Woman yelled at me in public toilets

My two were both scared of the hand dryer for a while when toddlers. Wouldn't have dreamed of asking people not to use it though, a little fright won't hurt them and they need to learn that it's fine.

My daughter is scared of hand dryers. I would never even dream of asking someone not to use them though!! There have been a few times some kind people have started to use them and then stopped when they’ve seen she’s been scared which I’ve appreciated. This woman was totally out of order in my opinion.

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/01/us/hand-dryers-children.html#:~:text=Do%20hand%20dryers%20pose%20a,or%20an%20approaching%20subway%20train.

Possible explanation:

Both she and her daughter are neuro diverse, and on top of that, she was having a terrible day.

Who knows?

But I wouldn't give it a second thought.

Then move on or report the post.

Constantly accusing someone of lying is tiresome for other posters and this is a site primarily aimed at supporting women.

The kind of hectoring that you have indulged in too often leads to a pile of.

Have I missed something?

She sounds like a weirdo. No wonder the child was distressed with a mother like that. Sorry about your experience, OP.

Going to play devil's advocate here and suggest that her child is ND (many have a terror of public toilets because of hand driers) and that this mum was having a really bad day and stressed because of the child's condition generally. The mental health of many parents at this stage isn't good. Doesn't justify her shouting at you which was awful.

She shouldn’t shouted at you. That was not warranted.

Interestingly though hand dryers admit a frequency that is painful to young children.

Also if the mother shouts at people every time a drier goes off that makes it more scary for the kid no?

Oo you’re so edgy and cool. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

Pot, kettle, black.

Ridiculous. My Dd was terrified of hand dryers but that was our issue - didn’t cross my mind that the wider public should notp use a hand dryer in our vicinity!

And shouting at strangers is only going to make her dc more scared and make it an even bigger issue.

As the parent of a 3 year old who screams the place down when she hears a hand dryer, you did nothing wrong and that mum is being absolutely ridiculous!

I have, in the past, been sensitive to this and checked before using 'extreme' dryers if there's been a small child in the toilets.

YANBU though, as I (imagining myself as the other parent) would consider such an enquiry a bonus, not a right. She should have been proactive if her DD is that bothered, and there was no need to have raised her voice.

Ah OP all you need to do is develop your psychic skills and you'll be able to predict these things! DS is autistic and hand driers never bothered him as a child.

Isn't it good for these kids to hear the noise and see that nothing bad happens and therefore become less scared of it over time? I mean, it's impossible for the whole world to be quiet and no-one to do anything in case a kid is scared right?

Maybe She’d had a very bad day with a child who, by the sound of it has sensory processing disorder.

I was commenting to a specific poster, not the op

She was being unreasonable.

Dd has autism and was absolutely terrified of hand driers until around age 7. Full meltdowns and refusal to go to the toilet at all when out.

So I started taking her into the disabled toilets where we could control whether it was turned on or not.

I told her that people liked to use them to dry their hands, and that we cant control what other people do just because it makes us scared. But that in this room it was her choice whether it turned on or not.

Eventually around age 7 she started turning it on herself and found it hilarious.

My 3 year old hates the noise of the hand dryer too but I'd never tell someone not to use one, or get mad if they do! That's ridiculous. I avoid using it myself when he's with me but that's as far as I go. He gets over it quickly when someone does (just puts his hands on his ears). The only way to get over the fear of a loud sudden noise is to experience it and get used to it.

Do you actually mean that she had to speak louder than normal over the awful noise of the hand drier? Lots of children find those unpleasant, so I make a point of avoiding them these days, unless there's no other option. Paper towels are much better.

Well stop commenting then. Nobody actually cares if you believe the op was shouted at or not.

Obviously YANBU OP. There’s one of two scenarios here, either she’s an entitled twat who thinks the world revolves around her and her little darlings or she’s someone having a bad day who is going to be mortified at how she’s behaved when she gets home and calms down.

She may well be a complete knob but I try to believe most people aren’t.

I know it's not the point of the thread, sorry, but I couldn't pass by this one..
Was always taught in nursing that if you don't dry your hands properly, you might as well not bother washing them!
Wet hands pick up and transfer bacteria so much more than dry hands do. Drying is just as important a step as any other part of hand washing. So I'm afraid I will be that person driving you nuts making sure my hands are bone dry🤣 That's why I much prefer tissue paper in a public bathroom!