To take separate holidays from now on

I think with children apartments are so much easier than hotels, as with kitchens and living rooms there’s more space.. and you can eat or prepare sandwiches when you like..

It sounds like the trip your DH wanted did not match with his needs and energy levels and his grumpiness spoiled the holiday for you. It would have worked fine, possibly, if he was not needing so much sleep and rest. His lie ins scuppered everything. I'd be pissed off, given he chose this trip and you organised it based on his wishes. Is this unusual for him? It doesn't sound like much fun for you.

A 6 month old baby won't care where they are as long as with parents. No need to base holiday around then.
Seems the issue isn't actually the child but the DH feeling unwell, being grumpy and moaning

I find going abroad much easier with little ones - much better than staying at home, but we both love holidays!

Why do you have to sit inside everyday for so long? Go for a walk, look at the architecture, have a drink in a cafe/bar, you don’t need to wait for things to open.

I’d make the most of seeing the sights now as it gets more tricky when they are older as they’re more vocal about being bored. Then beach holidays are great, they seem to be able to spend hours on the beach playing and we mix it up with a bit of sightseeing and days out. Self catering is so much easier at that age. Go out for lunch all together, do whatever activities, then you can have a nice relaxed meal when they’re in bed.

You can still both take it in turns to have a lie in, go out for an early lunch instead of breakfast, then go and have a look around outside.

You are throwing the baby out with the bathwater. Instead of just not holidaying together, sit down, reflect on this one, and learn from it. That's it!

Exactly this. So for a few years you will be having holidays that you will not necessarily enjoy as much as the ones you did when child-free. Little kids often just love splashing in a pool for example. But that will change. It's one of those things that you just have to get to grips with as a family.

FWIW we really had to persevere longer than most with family holidays as our now 15 year old has autism and really found a change of locale very difficult to deal with. So there were a few trips to Centreparcs or to AI hotels in Spain and Greece. By the time he was 10 he was a seasoned traveller and now absolutely loves travelling. This year we are going to the Great Barrier Reef and plan to do things like whale watching. 5 years ago he would not have coped, but we took things at his pace and developed his adventure muscles, so to speak.

The thing I learned about having a child is never plan your life around the stage they're currently in, especially under a year old as they change constantly. Yes holidays will be different but that's to be expected, my husband and I are keen hikers for example and always had week long hikes in remote places - on hold til our toddler is older. Your husband is being short sighted, things will change fast.

You're in a different era atm and it'll pass, my husband and I missed eachother and our life and lamented the prospect of not doing our hikes and city breaks anymore, but tbh now our son is a toddler, we would miss our little buddy if he wasnt with us so happy to have different breaks now, and to have really lived it up with ehat we enjoy in our twenties and early 30s together before parenthood.

This is largely what I came on to say, but I have mostly enjoyed our holidays, having significantly adapted my expectations.

It's great if you've got the budget to do a mix of solo and family trips (wish I had!).

Kids change your life. It can be hard to adjust. For years we did sun holidays in hotels with separate bedrooms or dividers. Ones that had splash parks/beaches and did a few day trips to ruins or cities e.g. Greece/Italy/France. Trying to do a bit for everyone.

School really limits flexibility and adds huge cost to trips. Now the kids are tweens, we've added city breaks staying in aparthotels and have done a Norwegian fjord cruise. We've had a really great time.

Talk it through with your DH.

You need to find a compromise and adjust your holidays and expectations.

Holidaying solo comes accross as quite selfish to me. Does your child never get to travel then?

I love travel. Used to do crazy itineraries travelling through exotic places. We now have a child, we've adjusted. Rather than 1 or 2 nights in places we now do 2 or 3 locations per holiday max. A slower pace. Rather than cheaper hotels or even nice hotel we tend to air bnb it. If in europe we eurocamp in carvans. We focus our travel arpund your child. Make sure theres a pool if possible, cook food more, find fun child friendly things to see and do. Travel is different now for sure. But i enjoy it just as much, if not more. The joy of being a travel loving parent is i now get to share it with my child and see her joy in exploring and finding new places and things. Yes sometimes this means experiecing playroungs around the world. But that's part of being a parent.

This makes no sense. Was it too busy or not busy enough?

I couldn't imagine leaving my dc for a week at that age and you make it sound like it's a punishment for him. Very odd.

We did as others have said, booked a holiday they would like but added things for us to make it nicer.

It sounds like maybe he underestimated how different things would be with the baby and how tired he would be! Rookie mistake basically 🤣 I know it's really frustrating, but try not to blow it too out proportion, he may well feel a bit silly and defensive for getting it wrong. It sounds like he'd be more open to the kind of holiday you suggested now he's actually done a holiday with a child!

But is that anything to actually do with the baby though?

It does sound a bit full on ( and I'm a traveller who likes seeing lots of places) . Maybe slow down a bit and intersperse sightseeing says with a couple of chill out ones

Sorry should have read this first. Your husband is being a bit of a knob and reality of having kids hasn’t fully caught up with him yet. I do think it’s normal to grieve a bit for your life before, but this is getting a bit out of hand.

You need to go somewhere that has a lot to look at and explore but doesn't require multiple hotels and moves. That way he can stay in and chill every other day while you wander around villages being Shirley Valentine.

Try again with the overseas holiday when the little one is 4-5. It gets a lot easier then. I think travelling around and having such a packed itinerary doesn’t suit babies. Either go for a self catering villa holiday or just do separate holidays until she’s a little older.

Getting up at ten is the biggest issue isn't it. That's a rubbish strategy in a place where everything is closed in the afternoon.

You could have one solo trip each & then do a family trip each year. To be honest that’s why places like Center Parcs, caravan parks, Eurocamp type places were invented - because they are geared towards families. There are plenty of other child friendly places that are probably nicer than those (Kinderhotels are supposed to be nice). I would also try to split the workload while you’re away so you both get a lie in, some time for a swim etc.. I think men cope less well with the disruption of babies. I think you both need to accept that you have a few more years of a less relaxing holiday.

The child wasn't central to his planning. As a PP said, learning experience. For holidays to be enjoyable with a child, their needs must be factored in from the beginning. Chalk it up to experience, talk about it properly when you get home, consider more carefully what you plan and book next time.

So you learn from what has happened this time and plan with it for next time. Don’t just give up on taking your baby away!

He is being an arse. If he's the one who wanted to do all the sightseeing then he needs to get out of bed early enough to do it!

So if I read your post correctly, DH chose the destination and arranged the itinerary but forgot to factor in DC's needs and is now a little frazzled. Parenting is a learning curve, you both now know for next time and can adjust accordingly.

For context, I’m a mum of 2, now aged 9 and 5. Before kids, we used to take a month off work and ‘do’ South America, Asia etc. not backpacking but not far off. Crazy itineraries, weird transport, last minute hotels, sketchy situations!
Then we had kids. It is hard to adjust. The fact you guys have jumped to ‘we must holiday separately’ is strange to me. Your daughter is probably just being weaned and that is hard. We did our first family holiday when our first was 6 months and yes it’s a right pain in the butt - finding food they’ll eat, nappies, still doing bottles, naps, the buggy, car seats.
In all honesty, we have changed the way we travel. We have done family hotels with pools in Mallorca, Greece and Tenerife. Yes it’s a bit pedestrian compared to proper travelling, but it’s the best way for us to make it enjoyable.
i do understand coming home and feeling like you need a holiday from your holiday! I promise you it gets easier. Last year was the first year we started to do ‘travelling’ travel with the kids, when youngest was 4. She will eat pizza, grilled chicken and pasta and that will take you most places! No nappies, no bottles, no changing mat. We do still need the buggy!
Last year we did a trip to Seville and a separate trip to Cannes/Nice/Montecarlo, but all based from one hotel in Nice.
Big mega hotels with a pool might not be your taste, it’s not our preference either, but don’t miss out on the family memories, and someone else going all the cooking and cleaning! And I promise you, by the time she’s 4 or 5, you’ll be able to do so much more with her.