To report driving instructor to police

Doubt the police will do anything. But would report him to relevant people. I assume he will have some sort of social media advertising his service? I would call him out on there so other clients will see.

CCTV of your son is his personal data.
He can probably ask for a copy of that.
There are rules relating to subject access requests.

Absolutely all this.

Also, it may or may not be an issue to use a mobile phone but you're meant to tell someone that you're recording otherwise it's not done with consent. Add that into the gaslighting and general treatment of someone neurodivergent and I think there's a reasonable case of someone being unsuited to their job.

I was sexually harassed by a driving instructor, too, but such things were barely talked about back then ('70s), so I just changed instructors. I wish I'd reported the fucker.

He was an ex-copper too, which makes me wonder if he'd abused his power to abuse other women in the course of his career.

This does seem like a good way forward. Would your DS feel able to make the complaint himself with your support? It might help him feel better about having been a target. There's an email address for complaints so you could start by finding out about the complaints process if you are unsure. They say there's no obligation to also take it to the police.

I can appreciate your concern about getting on the wrong side of this man and his family, but most people in his situation would be cautious. Any evidence of him retaliating would mean further risk to his livelihood (CCTV ringbell etc). He needs stopping from causing further harm to young people. Obviously, if you can get hold of the video he's sharing then you've a much stronger case. Could you ask the friend to forward it to you without saying how you plan to use it? Ooch, I know, but maybe ends justify means sometimes. This is appalling!

How awful! What a horrible bully! I would report him to whatever body governs driving instructors and I'd also make sure I warned every person I knew about his disgusting bullying behaviour! Does he have a Web page you could post a very honest review on?

I would report . Just so it's on record. You never know he may have other reports made against him already.
Can you leave a review about him anywhere? Warn others who may suffer the same from him.
Your poor ds. Learning to drive is stressful enough

He must be registered as part of a professional body - you could get him struck off (which he deserves) .

I feel for you OP, this moron has abused his position of trust and treated your DS appallingly. How cruel to film your boy like that. The new instructor sounds no better - there is no minimising this.

He’s a lousy teacher if your son didn’t understand the meaning of lines on the road after six months of lessons, yet readily understood when this was explained to him. Also using his phone while supposedly teaching.

Definitely point out these things in a review. You may not want to ruffle any feathers while your son still needs a local instructor. I hope your son soon passes his test, now that he has a better (even though unsympathetic) instructor.

As soon as he’s passed, I would post a scathing but factual and unemotional review of the disgusting first instructor.

Alternatively perhaps you could tell us what town you are in & hope the Daily Mail pick up this thread. I doubt your son is the first person he has done this to.

Utterly vile behaviour. I’m furious on your son’s behalf. Also really sad to think of this nasty behaviour.
The DI is an utter c**t and I don’t use that word lightly.

of course I am not.

and I think everyone should have the opportunity to participate fully in society.

but not everyone can/should drive. and sometimes it only becomes apparent during lessons.

As the driving instructor is legally supervising a learner, I’m pretty sure it’s against the law for him to be on his phone at all. The same as if he was driving himself.

If you could get hold of the video, surely this would be a police matter. Otherwise, your son has seen him on his phone in the car, so possibly could report him.

We reported a driving instructor who was a far right dick. He told our 17 year old son that it's fine to drive at Muslims and tried to get him into Andrew Tate websites.
He is still teaching.

https://www.gov.uk/complain-about-a-driving-instructor

You should report the phone use (which your son saw) if nothing else.

This is deplorable and this man shouldn't be working with young people at all, specially vulnerable ones.

I voted YABU only because of thd police element. If what you say is correct (snd whilst I don’t didbrlieve you, I don’t think you have any actual evidence?) he is an appalling bully. However, surely the best steps going forwards are: (1) change instructors (2) report to DVLA and his employer (3) leave a bad review online (eg Facebook if that’s where he or the company advertises). I think jumping to the police is not the appropriatd way to go, unless you actually can show tgem the film.

It’s a real shame that you don’t have a copy of the video. But I’d be telling the police about his use of the mobile whilst supervising a learner if he was filming whilst the car was actually being driven at the time .

How did your friend who told you about it react to it? Would they step up to confirm what they’d seen if you pursue this further?
I’d definitely report the driving instructor - via the link you’ve been given several times upthread
if nothing else it can start a record of complaints and that may build a profile for them to take action is others add to it

For all you know your complaint may be the one they need to take action

@bloodredfeaturewall

Excuse me? Are you suggesting the DI was stress testing his client rather than bullying a young autistic person? Unfortunately, filming him on his mobile phone then sharing the footage and laughing at the discomfort he has caused very strongly suggests otherwise.

Those of us who are NT have a responsibility to help protect those in society who can't do it themselves.

I would report him to the governing body if he is a member of one and would certainly be posting something on SM to name and shame him.

It's disgusting behaviour

That's awful behaviour.

A driving instructor is not allowed to use a mobile phone during lessons, they are just as much in charge of the vehicle as the learner.

It is illegal for him to use his phone whilst teaching, please report to the police.

This is the criminal offence you are looking for. A driving instructor cannot use their phone when supervising pupils.

You don't have any evidence and he's said it isn't true. Unfortunately, I can't see this going anywhere.

I'm glad to hear that some cars have CCTV now, I'll definitely be checking on that when it's time for DD to have lessons. My driving instructor use to talk to me about sex and put his hand on my thigh. I didn't have the confidence at 17 to tell him to fuck off.

My husband was a driving instructor for 30 years OP and what you describe in terms of bullying isn't uncommon behavior. I think many think they are untouchable and to a certain extent they are. I don't think the police will give you the time of day. I would definitely make a complaint to the DVLA - deliberately making a learner distracted and distressed is dangerous and shows a real lack of common sense.
The other things I'd consider although I don't think you'll get particularly far it might put the wind up him.... factual, scathing reviews all over social media - hit him in the business and a small claims pursuit of a refund - you probably won't win it but for £30 you'll get the satisfaction of making him jump through annoying court hoops and perhaps he will think twice before fucking around with his pupils again