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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Just found a used condom in our bed...

109 replies

miniworry · 23/05/2025 19:40

Well actually my DD aged 4 found it just as we came up to bed. 🤢 Literally just sat there in the packet at the top of the bed, still fresh liquid inside it.

Husband has been working from home today and has gone out on a works do for a few hours so I'm doing bedtime with the kids. I messaged him straight away saying WTF and he's just replied saying 'posh w*nk but I know that really doesn't help the situation I'm sorry babe'.

I don't think he's cheated because a) we have ring cameras on all 3 doors, there's been no gap in streaming all day and no one else in, and b) our bedroom is an absolute s* tip, the sheets are full of my fake tan from last night as I was changing them today and it looks just as much like Beirut in there as it did this morning.

We've got 2 young kids, one who is 1 and still isn't sleeping through and haven't had sex for about 3 weeks because quite frankly I just cba as I'm so tired..

But AIBU to be absolutely livid at the fact he's pleasuring himself whilst I am at work and b) that he left it there for my daughter to find!

Any advice on how I act when he returns home in a couple of hours would be greatly appreciated!

OP posts:
babystarsandmoon · 23/05/2025 19:46

There is nothing wrong with him sorting himself out but to leave it in bed is disgusting.

milkhoarder · 23/05/2025 19:46

No issue with him having a wank while you're at work, but I'd have huuuge issue with a used condom being left anywhere for kids to find. He does sound sorry, though!

MissMoneyFairy · 23/05/2025 19:45

Tell him to use the bathroom next time

roseymoira · 23/05/2025 19:45

YABU to be annoyed he’s had a wank, not to be annoyed he’s left a condom.

Phunkychicken · 23/05/2025 19:45

I'd be relieved as would take the pressure off

I would, however not be thrilled at DD finding it but as long as your weren't hysterical she'll be none the wiser

Hankunamatata · 23/05/2025 19:44

Well who cares if he is pleasuring himself. It's perfectly natural.

However used condom on the bed - grim, grim, grim

TheyreLikeUsButRichAndThin · 23/05/2025 19:44

Pretty rank not to chuck it but sounds like he’s telling the truth.

Createausernameplease · 23/05/2025 19:43

Genuine accident it seems, maybe just remind him to clean up. Don’t see the issue with him pleasuring himself?

Whyx · 23/05/2025 19:41

Tbh he sounds like he is actually sorry. Ask him to make it up to you 🤷‍♀️

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