Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ok yo become a Dad to a newborn at 57?

416 replies

WaterBed · 22/05/2025 15:23

Apart from being desperate to crack the joke

“i really hope so - I only live at 55”

in all seriousness - I personally think it’s fine to be a Dad age 57 when your OH has a newborn. Any thoughts ?

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Thegiantofillinois · 23/08/2025 20:43

MrMister82 · 23/08/2025 18:26

I think it is fine to be a father at aged 57. You have more wisdom and life experience for your son or daughter to draw upon as they navigate life.

Providing you live well into your 60s and 70s.

Personally, I think 40s is pushing it. And that's with dh being that age when we had ours. 40+ years is a big gap in experiences. No one cares what your school days/teenage life was like then... it's too far removed to be relevant.

MrMister82 · 23/08/2025 18:26

I think it is fine to be a father at aged 57. You have more wisdom and life experience for your son or daughter to draw upon as they navigate life.

twattydogshavetwattypeople · 30/05/2025 11:04

Hwi · 22/05/2025 16:13

Not up to us, it is up to God.

Show quote history

God's pretty gross then.

SalmonDreams · 30/05/2025 10:41

WaterBed · 30/05/2025 10:30

It is a pun about door numbers

Show quote history

But where does sex come in then?

Bbq1 · 30/05/2025 10:37

Bbq1 · 30/05/2025 10:33

Me neither. Can someone explain?

Show quote history

Just seen that the joke is apparently about door numbers.

Bbq1 · 30/05/2025 10:33

Redpeach · 22/05/2025 15:31

I dont get the joke about 55

Me neither. Can someone explain?

Original poster
WaterBed · 30/05/2025 10:30

SalmonDreams · 30/05/2025 10:29

What? I thought I understood the joke but now I'm totally confused. Are you sure it isn't just a pun about door numbers?

Show quote history

It is a pun about door numbers

OP posts:
SalmonDreams · 30/05/2025 10:29

WaterBed · 23/05/2025 17:06

No this isn’t the joke.

The joke is I hope he’s happy to be a Dad at 57 because I only live at 55 and therefore it was no distance to go for sex.

I’ve badly adapted it from a Bob Monkhouse joke

Show quote history

What? I thought I understood the joke but now I'm totally confused. Are you sure it isn't just a pun about door numbers?

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 29/05/2025 17:43

Wrong thread?

MinnieJumbo · 29/05/2025 17:41

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

BlueTitShark · 29/05/2025 16:48

This 46 year old slim, non smoking and non drinking woman with cancer is really enjoying some of the hubris on display here from people who think they can make themselves immune to ill health.

Yep. I think people who have been hit by ill health out of nowhere (and there are MANY people like that) or have an accident that made them disabled will agree with you there. Psychologically it’s a nice way to ignore the risks (like 20% of the population is disabled) but maybe not the best one when taking decisions like having a kid.

@SusanChurchouse i hope you are (or have) recovering well.
All the best to you!

SusanChurchouse · 29/05/2025 16:35

This 46 year old slim, non smoking and non drinking woman with cancer is really enjoying some of the hubris on display here from people who think they can make themselves immune to ill health.

In answer to your question OP, it wouldn’t be my choice but it’s not my life and the desire to be a parent is very strong and often doesn’t come with a side of logic. I became a parent in my early 30s and my own parents were not much older than your OH. They only had a few years of really being at full health and being active grandparents never mind parents before their health deteriorated. I’m really envious of peers who have fit parents who can play an active role in their grandkids’ lives. But some of that is luck. And genetics. I certainly didn’t expect to be hit with cancer when I had a kid at primary school but there you go.

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 29/05/2025 14:51

Firefly1987 · 25/05/2025 19:02

Please be kidding?

Show quote history

Sadly no. https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2025/may/24/were-totally-smitten-boris-and-carrie-johnson-welcome-fourth-baby

ihopeitsnot · 29/05/2025 07:07

Have NC’d for this, been on MN for 8 years.

DH(56) and I, quite a bit younger, are having our first and only next month. DH has two grown up DC and I have two primary school-aged children. Grown up DC don’t live with us (haven’t since I’ve known him) and being totally honest, this DC was an accident. I was very worried at the beginning, not because of DH’s age but because neither of us wanted any more and this means we will need to upsize which is very expensive where we live. The age isn’t ideal honestly but he is the best (step)dad to my DC, he couldn’t do enough for them and DS is closer to DH than anyone else in the world. So I know he’s going to be a great dad, despite the circumstances not being optimal. Life isn’t black and white.

whatisthegoddamnholdup · 28/05/2025 22:30

Far too old, he’ll have a 13 year old when he’s 70 fgs

BruFord · 28/05/2025 21:39

Praying4Peace · 28/05/2025 20:54

Disagree entirely.
People can take care of themselves and still become unwell.

Show quote history

@Praying4Peace I remember thinking that when Linda McCartney died in the 1990’s. She was known for her vegetarian diet and outdoorsy lifestyle, but she still developed and died from cancer in her 50’s. My Mum was also very active and healthy until she developed a chronic disease in her 40’s. Some people are unlucky despite their healthy lifestyles.

Anon501178 · 28/05/2025 21:13

My dad was 47 when I was born and died aged 80 when I had just turned 34.
He got to see me get married and my first DD for 4 years of her life, but that was it and he never properly met my second child who was born 3 weeks before he died.
I am an only child and now all my mum has as she was an only child too.
I obviously am glad they had me! But they were together quite afew years before I was born and think they held off abit too long really.
He was quite old fashioned in general so to be honest felt more like a grandad figure than a dad, especially as I got older, and we weren't that close really as we were on such different pages.But he gave me a good childhood and was involved and playful.
My best friend's parents had her young and her grandad was actually a similar age to my dad! And my dad was old enough to have been her parents parent!
Crazy stuff.

I think it's not ideal....but I think its unkind and unfair to write someone off due to their age and everyone's circumstances are different.
Age doesn't make someone a good or bad dad.

Praying4Peace · 28/05/2025 20:54

WaterBed · 22/05/2025 15:34

Because most 57 year olds who looks after themselves healthwise would be almost certain to see child to adulthood and bring wealth of experience

Show quote history

Disagree entirely.
People can take care of themselves and still become unwell.

Luddite26 · 25/05/2025 19:13

The joke means being a dad to a child at house no 57 when they live at no 55.
Lame even for a dad joke.

Firefly1987 · 25/05/2025 19:02

TheaBrandt1 · 25/05/2025 13:42

Very prescient thread with news about Boris fathering his (8th?) kid at 60!

Please be kidding?

Needmorelego · 25/05/2025 17:19

@TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne I don't think anyone quite understands the joke - even the OP 😂

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 25/05/2025 17:01

OnlyLittleOldMe · 25/05/2025 16:48

Pun

What?

OnlyLittleOldMe · 25/05/2025 16:48

Pun

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 25/05/2025 16:38

OnlyLittleOldMe · 25/05/2025 16:34

It's a punch on a door number

Show quote history

Still don't get it.

OnlyLittleOldMe · 25/05/2025 16:34

Redpeach · 22/05/2025 15:31

I dont get the joke about 55

It's a punch on a door number

Swipe left for the next trending thread