Child Benefit Rival Claim Ex Partner Earning Loads!!!!! part 2

It's not abuse. Maybe he does want to punish you because you put him through all this stress, but it's not abuse to be annoyed at someone who has treated you badly.

Yes, she had an excellent situation and she ruined it for herself. I don't think he's done anything wrong up to this point except that if he wanted maintenance he shouldn't have said he didn't. I would also say that OP has suffered enough but as she still hasn't acknowledged she's wrong, maybe not. She's had so many opportunities to apologise.

Because he said from the start that he didn't want maintenance from her and it does sound like he only wants it because he's annoyed at her. Which in the same circumstances, I would be too and all of this could have been foreseen. I didn't say he wasn't entitled, just that from what OP has told her this is him retaliating rather than actually needing that money.

Except that in this case, he is asking OP to provide support when she is obliged to do so but isn't.

Previously the OP was expecting him to provide (more) support when he wasn't obliged to do so but nevertheless was. It's not the same.

He's expecting you to fulfil your legal and moral duty to provide financial support for your children.

If you see that as "punishment" then I suggest you join Fathers 4 Justice as you'll likely fit right in with all the other members who see it as outrageous they are expected to pay what they owe.

Ye are practically a carbon copy of each other.

Was it abuse when you did it to him?

The wealth of the resident parent is entirely irrelevant. She owes financial support to her children, the same way he did when he was the NRP.

He paid her more maintenance than she was ever entitled to, yet she thinks she’s being abused because she’s required to pay the bare minimum. Laughable.

I have my daughter the majority of the time and I earn twice what he does. I still expect him to contribute. Why shouldn't he? We're both her parents.

🤣🤣🤣

I do think he's petty to go after you for CM when it sounds like he really doesn't need it and he said he didn't want it. But it sounds like you've refused to concede you were wrong to go after him so he's probably wanting to get his own back.

Once again, situations change. As it stands currently, you are legally required to pay him maintenance. You can’t argue with that. It doesn’t matter what he’s done in the past, he paid you maintenance when the children were with you (even when it was 50/50) and now the living arrangements have changed, it’s your turn to pay it to him.

Look, I get that you’re bitter about the situation, it can’t be easy, but it is what it is - you need to accept that and focus on building bridges with your children rather than getting one up on their dad.

Behold the results of your own efforts

Ever considered a tattoo, OP?

Of course you should pay towards your own children, whether they see you or not.

He may have been a Disney dad at one point, but he was also paying over and above what he was required to during that time. When he didn’t need to pay maintenance at all, he was still giving you hundreds and allowing you to claim both sets of child benefit. You were never without his financial support.

You were very fortunate to have the co-parenting relationship you did. You chose to blow it up. Behold the results of your own efforts.

Well, yeah?

You took the piss completely out of his generosity when he was paying you several hundreds every month, entirely voluntary as 50/50 and you tried to open a case to get even more. Of course he had to stop your greedy attempt. How dare you, frankly.

Then, he gave you a hundred opportunities (more than you deserved after the way you'd behaved) to address your own behaviour. But no, you kept on with your ridiculous "I believe myself to be right" greed.

He's done NOTHING wrong and been far more accommodating most people would have been. He hasn't turned the children against you, he's just told them what you did and they've formed the same opinion as the hundreds of people who told you how unacceptable and taking the piss your behaviour is.

Your choices and your consequences. He's done nothing and you can't beat to admit, even now, your greedy caused the whole situation.

Have you taken the time to consider that, at the beginning, he didn’t want anything from you? But then you pushed too far, tried to trick the system to benefit yourself, tried to take more from him than you were entitled to, and destroyed any good faith between you? Now he has the children and their day to day expenditure to shoulder alone, maybe he has realised he needs a contribution from you. Situations change and unfortunately you can’t just keep blaming him over and over and expect things to go your way.

This comment has hit the nail on the head!!

I mean… you did start this… you can’t criticise him when you were the first to put a monetary value of your children’s upbringing…

but that aside, you are legally required to contribute financially to raising your children based on the current situation. So, whilst it may not be something you agree with or want to do, he’s not done anything wrong.

That he and you are as bad as each other wanting money over your childrens happiness?

@ProlongedAffair do you think you are exempt from child support for children that don't live with you?

What was your "believed" outcome when you decided you didn't have to pay him?