Child Benefit Rival Claim Ex Partner Earning Loads!!!!! part 2

Yes, I know that’s what they told you, but can you please understand that they were mistaken and that therefore your ex has paid money that he didn’t have to pay, which was unfair to him.

For now, until his next challenge is upheld which it likely will be. You’re only adding to the bill of what you’ll end up owing him back.

For God's sake, why are you not listening?!

You've been told over and over again to drop this silly nonsense and apologise to your ex but you are hell bent on making this situation as bad as you possibly can for everyone involved.

Join the real world OP, you knew you weren’t primary carer, you just wanted the £££. You’ve now been formally corrected, you should have to pay every penny of it back because you should never have received it in the first place.

Why should he be out of pocket? It’s money you shouldn’t have had and therefore don’t get to keep.

Just call him! He has sensibly opened a reverse CMS claim to stop that route for you. Call him, agree that neither of you will pursue a CMS claim against the other, agree that you will both write to the CMS and say it is resolved, then just manage on one lot of CB and no CMS, but him having them equal time and being reasonable about paying for health insurance, trips etc.

For the love of goodness. Go to meditation, make a private arrangement with ex and stop all the messing about

But how is it fair to him that he was paying when you were, in fact, equal carers?

An excellent example of Karma.

If that’s the decision made then you’ll be paying it back, simple as that.

The thing is when you had more than 50:50 his income was less.

If youd gone through CMS then you might have gotten it, but it would be less anyway.

And im assuming youd rather the current set up where your children benefit from 2 present parents than the cash?

Even now hes trying to avoid this. Id definitely go back and ask what his suggestion is so I knew before I decided

My god, OP is thick as mince. This whole thread (and the last) is the perfect example of fuck around and find out!

Its because when you claimed you got the child benefit for both so they used that as the measure. Now you each claim one child their view has changed.

Child benefit investigated before they deemed it appropriate to award one each so theyre following suit. If Child benefit have evidence, they accept that a standard of proof was met

OP and DP currently have 50:50 childcare split. ExP was voluntarily paying money to OP, as well as half of school trips and providing medical, dental, and mobile phone contracts for DC.

OP discovered ExPs income was higher than she thought and asked for more money but he said no because they have 50:50. (In fact when the child benefit people asked for evidence OP admitted ExP had, had DCs an extra night to her in the preceding period of about 12 weeks)

Because he refused to pay more she took him to CMS claiming to be primary carer. (There was another thread where MNs said this was a bad idea and risked a good coparenting situation) Which she states is due to doing paperwork for school trips, even though they pay half each, and the fact that when the kids were younger she had them more.

Because she gets child maintainence CMS recognised her as primary carer. So her ExP put in a rival child benefit claim because he disputes that she is primary carer because of all the reasons above. She felt this is unfair because he earns too much to get the money, he will be taxed on it. That hes only doing it to prove hes 50:50 parent (we all said good for him)

She then asked how we thought it would go and ExP has been awarded Child Benefit for one of the children and is taking the CMS case to tribunal arguing as they are 50:50 he shouldnt pay this CMS. Hes also said he wont give her a penny more than CMS amount going forward.

And were waiting to find out how this ends

Jesus wept this is painful.

But he paid you money when it wasn’t 50/50 and he carried on paying you some when it was 50/50 - you wanted more after he got a pay rise. If you hadn’t disrupted the status quo then you would have carried on getting money even though it was 50/50!

You were entitled to CM when it was not 50/50. Now it is 50/50 of course you are not entitled to anything.

How would it be fair to give you money for kids he has half the time?

@ProlongedAffair you have been told this several times by me and other posters you are choosing not to listen.

It isn't a case of IF the court finds in favour it is when. You will be ordered to pay back any excess CMS you were paid that you weren't entitled to, your ex could ask for compound interest to be added to this.

The two outcomes are CMS/court orders that no CMS is owed by either parent as it is 50/50 or they order that your ex pays you CMS for one child and you pay for him one child which likely means that they will cancel each other out or you may get a small sum of money as your ex earns slightly more than you.

You need to stop fixating on what was the past, and this petty notion of you doing more of the 'admin' for the children, it's not helpful to anyone in this situation least of all you and it isn't healthy. The courts and CMS aren't interested in the past, they work on the here and now.

It doesn't matter what people on here say - you'll only listen to the odd post that agrees with you...

Get proper legal advice, someone you'll actually listen to, before your ex drops his offer for amicable resolution and you damage your relationship irreparably

But when he had less than 50% care wasn't he paying you quite a lot more than what he was required to? So that has already been accounted for

And even after he took on 50% he was still paying you, even though he wasn't really required to. And you were getting the child benefit for both children.