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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DH forgetting conversations

58 replies

UseTheBigLight · 22/05/2025 14:01

I know people forget things and this is trivial.
We’ve had the same chat many times for ages. We agreed that TV doesn’t work before school with 2 similar age kids to get out the door (by me). It might for some but not us as we don’t have time. I’m trying to sort food/chivvy them along etc and don’t have time for arguments about who wants to watch what and for how long or them being zombies and not wanting breakfast etc, yet he still puts it on for them most mornings when they ask him to, right over breakfast time.
He keeps saying he forgets ‘my rule'. It's not my 'rule'. We've talked about it and agreed it together.
This morning it’s a film on so I took myself off to the bedroom with a cuppa and left him to it.
He's said sorry but is put out. I mentioned it by text (though at least a text is written down).
He's an intelligent man in a job that requires following strict rules & regs with time-related transactions.
I make sure they don’t have screens as they are getting ready for him to take them to rugby practice. AIBU to bring it up?

OP posts:
Codlingmoths · 22/05/2025 15:11

I think you’re taking the right approach. He wants to choose to make it harder to get them out the door, you step out. Text him that if he turns the tv on in the morning, you will go for a walk/ back to the bedroom and leave him to it with the kids, you will not continue to parent in spite of him. He can be a team or do it on his own.

EuclidianGeometryFan · 22/05/2025 15:03

so I took myself off to the bedroom with a cuppa and left him to it.

Which is exactly the right response.
Can you follow through even further? Such as go out for the day and leave him to take them to school, so he can do the explaining to the school if he is late.

Dunnocantthinkofone · 22/05/2025 14:35

Strategic incompetence
Which in my mind isn’t trivial at all

skkyelark · 22/05/2025 14:31

I agree, it's unlikely he's actually forgetting. If you've already spoken about it, unfortunately you probably need to make it his problem before he'll 'remember'.

If he turns it on, he's taking responsibility for getting them out the door. You might be conveniently unavailable.

Lurkingandlearning · 22/05/2025 14:27

The previous posters are spot on. Put a post it note on the TV screen before you go to bed as an aid for the feeble brained fuck wit

grumpygrape · 22/05/2025 14:21

HenDoNot · 22/05/2025 14:04

He doesn’t forget, he just can’t be arsed parenting his children.

This has my vote

Orangemintcream · 22/05/2025 14:14

HenDoNot · 22/05/2025 14:04

He doesn’t forget, he just can’t be arsed parenting his children.

^^ this.

I bet he’s not forgetting things at work.

HenDoNot · 22/05/2025 14:04

He doesn’t forget, he just can’t be arsed parenting his children.