ADHD in toddler girl

I've just realised who you are.
You must have started about 10 threads about your dd in the last couple of months.
On EVERY ONE, people start off reassuring you (as they have done here), then people gradually make the link to all your past posts.

I've no idea why you continue to start threads.
Nothing, in ANY of your threads suggests your dd is anything outside of a normal range of development.
You've been told that over and over again.
You've also had many posters suggest you get help with this obsession you have with trying to find something "wrong with" your dd.

She's two. And sounds like an average two year old.

Stay off social media and all of it's ND 'advice', it's damaging.

That's you stereotyping and an outdated view of ADHD. Girls with ADHD can be masters of masking, so might be super compliant and 'easy'. Hence why girls with ND, depending on the child, can fly under the radar so easily. Sometimes the ND kid is the quiet one in the background who is oh so well behaved.

Interestingly my dd has the opposite issue. She slept poorly for the first year ish, but after that, slept 12 hours every night and several hours during the day until she was 3. After that, always at least 12 hours a night. Even now as a young adult, she needs a ridiculous amount of sleep.

It’s so interesting how different traits show in different children.

Does she sleep? I think the only early indicator of ADHD in my DD (diagnosed at 12) was that she did not sleep. First time she slept through the night she was 5. Most of what OP has described are quite typical of 2 year olds.

Either way, it's far too early to tell.

But sounds like a completely normal just-turned-2 yo.

Is this a troll post? Some kind of stealth brag? Your child is clearly advanced, shows no signs of ADHD and I have no idea where you're getting that from.

I wonder this every single time this poster pops up- 2 of mine have ASD/ADHD. Having someone write a long arsed list of all the things their 2 year old can/will do/say/eat and then say “do you think my child has ASD/ADHD? I’m soooo worried!” Is a bit of a kick in the tits tbh. And pointless. The NHS trust my middle child was under when he was diagnosed with ADHD the youngest they’d diagnose was 7. They refused to even really discuss the possibility before that although he was already diagnosed with ASD by then.

Is this a troll post? Some kind of stealth brag? Your child is clearly advanced, shows no signs of ADHD and I have no idea where you're getting that from.

I have a 27 month old son. He's just started putting two words together and saying 'mine'. That's it. He doesn't give a shit about circle time, ignores the majority of other kids he doesn't know, and pretended to be asleep through his 27 month review (fake snores and all). Christ knows what you would think of him! I mean yes he's a bit odd, but I sure as shit wouldn't start saying there's something wrong with him.

Dump social media, it's full of self-diagnosed 'ADHD' and 'Autism'. Stop pathologising your kid.

I knew it would be you again. Please seek help with your anxiety. It must be stopping you from enjoying your daughter’s childhood.

Honestly, kindly, in a nutshell: You really need to get some help.

OP I think people are being unfairly dismissive here. It's definitely possible to spot early signs of ADHD in a toddler. DD was exactly the same at that age and it was researching the symptoms that led me to realise that I almost certainly have undiagnosed ADHD as well.

However in the bigger picture, it's really not a big deal. ADHD is a spectrum and many kids and adults can have perfectly productive and happy lives. DD could also never stay still for circle time and would wander around while the other children did the activities. However all of this improved significantly between ages 5-6. I personally don't believe she grew out of it, but she simply became better at masking and reading/analysing unspoken social rules. She has lots of friends, loves school and (so far) no issues with reading and writing. So I'm quite happy and don't think it's necessary to seek a diagnosis or support unless things take a drastic turn for the worse.

So yes, your DD may have ADHD but it really isn't anything to worry about. Make sure she has enough activities to burn off energy and give her space to unwind and "regulate" after nursery. Try to arrange playdates and help her get started with a good social life. The goal is to build her self esteem that she's great and lovable the way she is.

You say there isn't a family connection but health anxiety/rumination is an extremely common ADHD symptom. The restlessness often gets internalised as thoughts so instead of physically fidgeting, adults with ADHD have racing brains that don't shut off.

She is still young.

A diagnosis has done the exact opposite for my DD. It has allowed teachers to see her as a child with ADHD, rather than as the naughty child who isn't on task (admittedly, she's never been disruptive). They've put in place strategies that might help her.

And schools aren't looking for children to exclude. They only exclude in extreme cases.

I'll say it less kindly, you need to listen to everyone on here and on your previous posts that you need to stop focusing on this and just focus on raising her.

This obsession that you almost want her to be diagnosed is no good for you or her.

It's at the point now where I don't know if you're just making this all up for some twisted reason

@ToddlerMum312 I say this kindly....she is only going to be treated differently if you keep obsessing over things being "wrong" with her when there isn't.
She'll get the reputation of the "kid with that mum".
She's 2.
Let her be 2.
Please.

Please see your GP about your anxiety. It is not normal to spend this amount of time obsessing about something that is highly unlikely to be true.

There is nothing in your post which suggests neurodivergence. From the posts of others, this is not the first time you have posted about this.

Where exactly have you heard of schools and pre-schools kicking children out ‘just because they’re different’

You are talking absolute shit. That doesn’t happen.

Stay off the internet. Stop taking whatever you’ve seen on TikTok and Instagram as truth.

No, I wouldn't be concerned about a 2 year old like you describe.

But, even if (and it is a really massive IF ) she did later get an ADHD diagnosis, it won't be for years yet, so stop trying to measure and compare her all the time and enjoy spending time with her and encouraging her and giving her positive feedback.

She sounds exactly like my son, he’s just turned 3 and literally talks/moves constantly from the moment he wakes up at 7am until he falls asleep 12hrs later.

I have ADHD so it wouldn’t be a massive surprise if he ends up having it too.
However, at the moment he doesn’t seem dissimilar to other children his age (it’s normal for toddlers to have a short attention span, ask a lot of questions and be very active/chatty).
He’s happy, sociable with lots of friends and is ahead when it comes to developmental milestones so it’s not something I worry about too much at the moment (I’ve been happy and successful with ADHD so there’s no reason to panic). If he seems to be struggling more as he gets older then I’ll look into getting him assessed then.

I have read up on parenting a child with ADHD and all the techniques and tips seem like fairly sensible ideas for parenting any child so it doesn’t hurt to use them if you want to (I had a mum who didn’t really understand how my brain worked and it caused me stress and her a lot of frustration)
I also teach him some of the basic coping strategies that I use, again they’re pretty helpful for any boisterous, curious and bright child (e.g. prompting him ‘what’s your plan’ if it looks like he’s going to do something without thinking it through).

Hopefully hearing our diverse experiences will help OP realise that ND is diverse and doesn't have to be regarded as a terrible thing necessarily.

As parents, OP, we just have to accept our children as they are. It sounds like this issue is taking up a lot of thought time and anxious energy for you, so maybe talk to someone for reassurance? Even if your child is ND, it's not the end of the world and she is still her special, unique self.

Absolutely @PawsAndTails there are lots of children who present differnelty, I do get that- and also, things change for children as they get older as well.

I wouldn't usually be so black and white but this particular OP has been writing about an apparently NT child who does well in social situations and fretting about whether there is any way she could describe her as ND for ages.

Stay off social media

And my AuDHD child didn't do any of that and could sit still in the library and be very social. She'd be sitting still in the library at 3 actually reading the books herself because she could read at that age. (Offered just to show how diverse ND can be).

So here are my thoughts as a parent of a child who has autism and ADHD.

No, your tiny two or three year old is not ADHD because they struggle to sit still. That is COMPLETELY NORMAL for a child of that age.

My child at 3 years old didn't make eye contact, didn't engage with any groups; put her hands over her ears and screeched like a pterodactyl when there were other children around, didn't respond to her name. I don't want to be a dick but honestly I'd have been delighted if my only concern was that she didn't sit still in the library.