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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

That’s it really..

55 replies

GiggleWiggle246 · 22/05/2025 07:00

I’ll try & keep it short. Was on the phone to my mum on loudspeaker & my brothers GF was with her. I’d recently upgraded a home appliance and asked my mum if she would like the older appliance. She reminded me she already had it but then immediately asked BGF if HER mum would like it. A woman I’ve never met, my mum has a few times and they get on well. Before I could say anything she quickly said yes of course! It’s not a cheap appliance, £150+ and was recently replaced by the company and I’d used it once before getting the upgrade. My plan was if my mum didn’t want it I’d offer it to my MIL. Now that’s out the window and I feel obliged to give it to BGF for her mum.

Am I just being really unreasonable? My mum has form for things like this. She announced my pregnancy to family members before I got a chance to and cried on my wedding day because she didn’t know my IL’s.

OP posts:
Lactolove · 22/05/2025 07:09

GiggleWiggle246 · 22/05/2025 07:05

Because BGF was sat right there and my mum literally said “oh! Wouldn’t your mum like it?” And she immediately said oh yes please! I was awkward as I was on speaker.

I mean literally all it would have taken was “oh I’ve promised it to mil though if mum didn’t want it”

job done
no drama
no simmering resentment!

Oddsocksanduglyshoes · 22/05/2025 07:09

GiggleWiggle246 · 22/05/2025 07:05

Because BGF was sat right there and my mum literally said “oh! Wouldn’t your mum like it?” And she immediately said oh yes please! I was awkward as I was on speaker.

You need to stop people pleasing. You could have said do t worry if you don’t want it mil does. End of conversation.

GiggleWiggle246 · 22/05/2025 07:05

Because BGF was sat right there and my mum literally said “oh! Wouldn’t your mum like it?” And she immediately said oh yes please! I was awkward as I was on speaker.

OP posts:
Zanatdy · 22/05/2025 07:02

Just message your mum and say you didn’t realise your DH had offered it to his mum and he’s already taken it. Don’t give it a stranger as your mum has offered it.

TheyreLikeUsButRichAndThin · 22/05/2025 07:02

Why didn’t you just say ‘oh no actually I’m going to offer it to MIL’??