To think uninviting a child to a party is exceedingly rude

I don't know which is why I wouldn't comment on that. What I'm saying is there certainly is a reason, the inviter is providing the location, which is even more important as it is her HOME, dealing with the expense and whatever reason she has be it too many kids attending or a child that potentially could be a problem that is her choice.

So you excuse upsetting a child with “I made a mistake”, get over it? You don’t own it?

Says a lot about you.

I'm saying you are bring dramatic. If being disinvited from an event at 7 years old haunts you, I'm not surprised you are having this reaction to a post where we have very little information on the actual story of WHY he may have been uninvited.

I would never have anyone in my house I didn't want there. Adult or child, simple. And I would not be extending pity invites out of a mistake or courtesy.

We know what the inviter's side is. She invited OP's child by mistake and withdrew the invitation after OP had responded to the invite to confirm that he would attend. She then uninvited him. What more do you need to know?

Are you implying that OP's child is horrible in some way so deserved to be uninvited?

I think it's really rude. I accidentally invited an extra 5 children than I meant to to my DD's last birthday, because I put the invite in the wrong group chat. I sucked it up and paid the extra to have them. Turned out a great party!

I think we've got the host mum on here!

So then what happens after you’ve been petty? You just going to continue that until the kids leave school? You are also harming a potential friendship. What if these kids do become friends, but you’ve been a petty child to the other parent, do you think the kids are going to view you in any favourable light? You’d just look stupid.

It’s not rude it’s evil.

Not sure what you’re saying here?

Very rude indeed. I hope they get their come uppance. I would book something else for your little one for that day and tell him that mummy's sorry, she forgot that she had already booked xyz on that day and that he couldn't go to hid classmates party. I wouldn't tell him that he is no longer invited . I am so sorry this has happened to your little one OP.

Your son is a credit to you 💙.

If only all parents fostered this type of behaviour.

Some big issues yes... not a recinded birthday invite!

No, that’s what you think. She made a mistake. She never had any intentions of inviting him. She said sorry it was a mistake and uninvited him. Why you making a huge massive deal over this. Deal with it move on.

It's rock-bottom basic manners that if one accidentally invites someone to a social event, one never lets on, and graciously hosts them.

What lowlife those people must be, to uninvite a child.

Crass and cruel?! This child will go through far worse than a party he won't even remember in a couple of weeks. It's a birthday party, there will be plenty more, some he may be invited to, others he may not. You are defending something on a public platform that you have no idea the reasoning for. I'd love to hear the inviters side personally.

My youngest was left of off a few party invites from the same clique of parents and I was told by a mutual
friend is was because of the job DP and I do. 🤣

Not inviting him in the first place would be absolutely fine. Inviting him, even by accident, meant that he was told he was invited as his mum asked him if he wanted to go. Unless the venue is limited on numbers, which probably isn't the case as it is a party at home, it is rude and unkind to uninvite.

Is this a child your DC is friends with or did it feel like quite a random invite?

It might be uncomfortable for your DC to have turned up to a party if they’re the only one who isn’t part of the friendship group because they were a completely random addition through a name mix-up.

Do you not remember anything from your childhood? I'm in my 40s and I absolutely remember casual cruelties like this. They had a bigger impact because I was a child. As an adult, I expect some people to be a bit shitty. But not at 7.

Owing someone nothing doesn't make it the right course of action. It is crass and cruel. Sure, you can't change what she has done - but she should be called out for her awful behaviour.

Mumsnet is usually full of posters telling others to not be doormats and stand up against bullying and nastiness. This is nasty behaviour, even if it originated in a genuine error.

Agree it’s really rude, but your main focus now should be making up a white lie to your son to pretend you can’t go, so he doesn’t feel left out. You can’t demand he’s invited back or just show up. And it wouldn’t be nice for your son to have the other parent have to explain to your son that they made a mistake and he’s uninvited. Only real option to give the best chance of your son not feeling bad about it is to say oops turns out we can’t make x party date, never mind. Would have worked fine on my 7 year olds.

Rude!

Wow that’s just rude and mean of the parent, what is wrong with some people xx

N’ah! An adult who makes a mistake needs to take some bloody responsibility to put it right instead of brushing it under the carpet.

OP had replied to accept on the WhatsApp before some of the others replied so if it’s a question of numbers, the party mum should have rescinded one of the late responders invites instead.

At a minimum she should have apologised profusely and explained what went wrong.

Uninviting a 7yr old child to a birthday party without a decent explanation as if it’s no big deal is crap parenting 101 and she deserves to be called out on her shitty behaviour.