Men DO NOT have right of way!

We had an incident in Costco recently where a man barged into me with his trolley. I was facing away so didn't see him. No "excuse me" or anything. Shortly after he did the same to mum. She had a right go at him. No way would he have done this with a man. Little shit 😡

😞 awful behaviour.

I’ve just remembered the guy I witnessed years ago running around a park, plenty of space on the wide paths, but when he came to a group of women doing some sort of buggy fit, he shouted ‘fucking MOVE’ at the top of his voice. He didn’t shout at any of the male cyclists I saw him dodge round.

I had a guy walking diagonally across a courtyard actually try to race me to get to the point where our paths intersected first. He had to duck out at the last minute. He stopped and glared. I felt I’d made my point.

My elderly mum and I and my pushchair and baby being carried going down steps to the tube. Young man in suit, obviously professional and above us mere obstructions pushes past.hes obviously strong and fit, it would be nothing for him to move to one side or, goodness! Offer to take the push chair, but no, and elderly lady stopped to help.
he had a big roll of 50s visible in his jacket pocket. I hope someone pinched them !

I think the main point is to not look at faces, so maybe it would work to look ’through’ people and they will subconsciously note that you are not thinking about accommodating them. Maybe you could experiment and report back 😁

Splashy front crawl men are the worst. And I’ve noticed they seem to try and race me, even though I’m not a particularly fast swimmer.

You are quite right to stay out of the way of swans. Those bastards will win patriarchy chicken every time - male, female, alone, in a flock. They give no fucks.

I’m fat and 40 so men treat me like shit constantly anyway. Although a man did accidentally hit me with his elbow in the petrol station the other day and he said ‘sorry luv’ I nearly passed out with shock. Men in public are never ever nice to me!

Also totally agree re swimming @MayaPinion I'm the other end of the spectrum to your daughter, unfortunately. Just restarted swimming after 5 years, so am painfully slow. I do go in the slowest lane. Even then, one huffed me the other day, because he was stuck behind me! Sorry my existence and attempt to improve my health is inconveniencing you! Maybe go in the medium lane??

An able-bodied person without a pushchair should always make way for a person with a pushchair or holding the hand of a small child who can’t easily and safely go into the road.

You sound rude and part of the problem.

I'm stealing this. There are a few contexts where it would be most useful.

Absolutely this!

One day I'll have a head on collision no doubt, but I just can't bring myself to let them past. My Walter White moment would also be shunting one of them 😶

Yup.
Especially when I'm out running with my buggy they look furious at me for taking up space.
I get the dirtiest looks for saying "excuse me can I just squeeze past, thank you" when they are walking dead centre on the path or 2 abreast.

I genuinely will give way to everyone unless there is no other way. At the end of the day I've got wheels and I don't want to be a pain but if there is room, share the space!

Seems to be up to a point tho. Much older men seem to be alot more polite and actually say encouraging things to me.

Oh my gosh, I have noticed this too, in fact, I mentioned to DH recently, after a shopping trip that it always seems to be me that moves out of the way when a man approaches. I am going to stop in future.

I have also noticed how no-one seems to hold the door open for me, they seem to walk through it and let it swing back. If I hold a door open for the next person, they seem to walk through it, leaving me trying to walk but holding the door with my fingertips until someone takes it.

It feels like I never had the memo entitled The Rules Of Manners Have Changed.

What are they supposed to do, lug it into the road then up the pavement again?

I play patriarchy chicken. Sometimes you need nerves of steel.

Victoria St always provided offenders for me to play with. I tend towards the unobservant anyway so I've accidentally being playing for years, but once I realised it (via Mumsnet of course) I take great pride into leaning into it.

I'm too short to do that without hurting my neck Most women are about 4" taller than me (especially younger ones) and most men at least 8" taller.

I think most people are agrophobic which would explain their instinct to stop in pinch points like doorways/ by the stock trolley, or spread out maximum occupancy across a path.

Splashy-Front-Crawl men can't swim two abreast across a lane because they'd drown each other in their wake
I solve that issue by swimming in a lake. I do give way to the swans though!
I've admitted to my sons that I've kept them up to stage 8 swimming so they have good technique and are not going to drown everyone else in the pool with a sloppy arm-slap technique.

Elderly gentlemen (using that term specifically) never seem to do this, and when I’m with my dad he always walks roadside. DP has on occasion tried to push me in to the verge to avoid other people who won’t move, he has had very short shrift for it. I’m happy to move for those less able to, and I’m certainly happy to move if someone else indicates too (you can generally tell intention by how people look at you), but if someone moves in to my path deliberately or has that won’t move glint about them (which you learn to recognise) then I simply stop. Yes it’s generally men in my experience although not exclusively.
The very worst instance was when I was with my mum (elderly and on sticks because she can’t walk far or well), and I was lining up to get coffee and she was walking towards a near table, a mid 60s couple saw and changed their course to run and get to her table first (it was pretty empty and plenty of space), people can be absolute arseholes.

I didn’t know this is a legit game! I have days of being nice and other days of being a dick. I still find that most men are nicer about giving way. It is usually women that are problematic but none have as yet fought back my sharp elbow. Bicycles are annoying yes. And group runners, ffs some during midday weekends on the south bank! I don’t move for anyone I find annoying, looks entitled or is not paying attention around them. I admit I am judgey

I live in London and play this game everyday with f tourists! Completely not self aware or give a damn about locals going about our lives. They meander 2-3 abreast on narrow pavements and stop in the even narrower areas in groups. And then the large tour groups! I very loudly say “excuse me”
or “getting past” and in some cases “tw*”

One thing this thread has proven is that it’s not just men.

Yes, when there isn’t much space I always make way for women with prams and small children, because I remember how shit it is trying to navigate your way round with a fucking pram. I really hated my pram-pushing era 😁 Plus, it’s a kind of instinctive thing to make sure little children stay safe.

I've noticed my own husband does this. It's not through any sort of power play - he's genuinely just totally oblivious and, ultimately, selfish, because he's not thinking of anyone else other than himself.

As he (of course) strides ahead just in front of me, rather than walking alongside, I'm left trailing in his wake trying to figure out which way he's going to go as a last minute decision when he realises people aren't just going to get out of his way.

I'm only on the first page of this so far, so I'm going to carry on reading and hope that I come across a perfect retort/comment to say as he'll only otherwise think I'm criticising him rather than educating him!

Near where I live there is a famous boys public school. They are by far the worst IMO.

I pick the inside of the pavement, that way they can still spray across as they wish but one of them has to go in the road or drop behind, same with tow path

I just stop, as I'm not altering my line of movement in a subservient manner, as if im not there. Stopping flummoxes them as they have grown so used to people moving out of their way and there is not fault as I haven't bumped into anyone