AIBU to think if DS has suspected ASD at 1 year old it probably is?

You must go to the GP and ask for a referal to audiology. You will get one. This is the most obvious next course of action and your GP should recommend it. Also speak to SaLT and find out at what age they start accepting referals.

I am sorry you are so worried. Obviously nobody here can tell you if your son has ASD but I hope what you are hearing is that even if he does, it isn’t the end of the world. Kids with ASD have rich and happy lives, and often are more passionate about something that they enjoy than others. My advice is to enjoy your son while he is little and take each developmental step at a time.

So I recognised autistic traits in my son at 1 he had no language not even babbling . He had quite a sullen face and many many meltdowns a day. He hated being held (except for feeding) He was angry a lot of the time. Lots of head shaking/rocking. No pointing or showing me things, clapping or waving. No interest in other children . At around 20 months I contacted health visitor who agreed to come and see him, she did his 2 year review which he did badly on most areas except walking/climbing. She suggested speech therapy as a starter. Speech therapist agreed re autism and suggested referral to paediatrician which she put in. He saw the paediatrician at 25m (this was 7 years ago NHS wait lists were less dire) who agreed he met the criteria for autism pathway. Pathway was about year at that point , he was assessed and diagnosed by 3 years and 3 months.
He was in nursery at the time so they had him on their Sen register and applied for funding for additional support for him which continued on to school. We applied for his EHCP in reception, he’s in y5 now still in mainstream and has a full time 1:1. He started talking gradually from around 3 although a lot of it was repeating until age of around 7 now he doesn’t stop talking.

My advise if you continue to be concerned would be get your child seen by a paediatrician (or whatever diagnostic pathway your area has ) before 4. Once in school all decisions regarding asd referrals etc are made by school who will have their own agenda /funding concerns etc. early years pathway is also shorter than school age one.
Do get his ears checked and maybe consider speech therapy in a few months (whilst private is quicker you ideally want nhs if your asd referral would be NHS but obviously wait times need to be taken in to account) and see how he does at his two year review. It may be your concerns have gone by that point.

You absolutely do not need to go private for a hearing test. It's the first thing that needs to be checked when speech and communication are delayed. Ask your GP for a referral.

Obviously private will be quicker but you'll need a hearing test as part of any emerging needs assessment.

Sorry it mean to read ‘past 3 years’ in first part

Yes definitely can be this too (glue ear for example) it wasn’t for us but any child on pathway should have hearing checked

Hi there 👋 okay so, no waving clapping pointing (this didn’t happen until last 3 years) non verbal until 3.5/4. Stimming constantly (vocal stims loud grunts etc rocking back and forth). No eye contact. Would take to soft play / groups and would not engage with anyone S if they were ‘on their own planet’. Didn’t laugh or smile (this came at around 2.5 years ish)
would roll their eyes around the room as if having a seizure. Didn’t respond to any words or requests (ie go get a drink etc) until almost 4 years.
their play it was obvious- lining things up for hours opening closing doors for hours repeat repeat repeat 🔂
Their walking. / motor skills was always fine.

One of my children was similar. Turned out to be his hearing and once that was sorted out he was absolutely fine. He went from not talking at all to talking in sentences quite quickly. I would definitely get his hearing checked as a first step.

Can I ask what your child was exhibiting around the age of 15 months? X

Please have his hearing checked. They told me my youngest was developmentally delayed. It turned out he had glue ear and could hardly hear anything most of the time. He apparently was very good at spotting visual clues and seemed to have taught himself some lip reading skills. He fooled doctors, speech therapists, his nanny, creche staff and both his parents. He's a university graduate.

For what its worth, my eldest is on the spectrum. He's in medical school. He has lots of friends and interests.

Hi OP. I spent many an evening trawling MN and similar for those ahead of me in the journey to tell me there was a miracle about to happen… alas… my child was diagnosed at 2.5 years. Life has been stressful, upsetting, challenging and a constant fight. We sorted out benefits (DLA high for both) this has helped pay for some therapies our council doesn’t provide. We’ve had to change our entire life plan but our child is happy and loved. We planned for more children but can’t due to the care need level.
People don’t realise it’s perfectly normal to mourn the experience of parenting that child you thought you’d have. It doesn’t make you love them any less. I’d lay down and die for my child right now but do I see others having an easy and fun time with their children and get jealous? Yes. Do I cry myself to sleep? Sometimes. But the dark cloud does lift and the diagnosis actually brought me clarity and at long last someone else saying yes wait a minute it must be really difficult for you all, which sometimes is all you need to hear.
Sending you and your little one love.

My godson did not speak or walk until he was 2. He is absolutely neurotypical and brilliant. Currently studying to be an architect. At 13 months he did communicate a bit more than you describe, but not by much. He also had an older sibling and he was mostly content to let them do all the talking. So, I wouldn’t rule out any possibilities just yet. He is very young to be sure of anything much.

My baby is almost 15 months and like this except she doesn’t clap

This sounds exactly Ds2. He eventually started talking at around 3.5 and hasn’t stopped since lol. He got a diagnosis of ADHD with autistic traits when he was 11.

He’s now 22, thriving and about to start university. He’s extremely funny, has loads of friends and is a really happy young man. There have been bumps along the road and I’m sure there will be a few more to come, but overall his neurodivergence has given so much to our family

Has he had his hearing checked recently?

Both my DD’s were like your son. The ER lest has asd and was in an early intervention programme from 2.5, the younger was given early intervention from 14 months because she was on the same track , eldest was fully verbal by 4, incredibly clever (as in reading chapter books and able to do secondary maths aged 5) and plays 8 instruments, definitely autistic but deals ok with the world. Youngest learned to speak at 2.5 and has dyslexia and adhd, again very clever, masters educated… it’s a very variable situation

We were under the early intervention Speech and language team from 15 months and physio from 21 months, discharged from both earlier this year at 27 months, we're in Scotland though so pathways may be different. My health visitor was brilliant, keep reaching out to them.

Above all try to enjoy him, it's really too early to get the answers so we shouldn't torture ourselves looking although I know it's easier said than done!

I find my that with my DS and his brother too!

Also once Ds Sas diagnosed i realised my whole family are neurospicy, so he doesn't really stick out in our group!

Sounds like my DS, he's on the spectrum a bit and he has ADHD but he's fine really. He's got his challenges but he's doing great overall.

I found doing early SPL therapy (and OT would have helped) helped give him a boost. The main thing that helped was adhd meds.

Overall I find him easier to deal with than my NT child!

My DS was the same at that age in regards to speech and pointing. We received an autism and global development delay diagnosis when he was around 3. I was in bits. It felt like my world was crumbling and I truly worried for him. He’s 6 now and doesn’t stop talking, he has loads of friends and he is exceeding his age in reading and maths. He’s funny, kind and gives the best hugs. I wish I knew then what I do now. Sending lots of hugs x