AIBU about the is feedback on my catering?

Next time OP make an enormous cake and make them eat it all like Bruce Bogtrotter in Matilda 😂.

Your guests remind me of Alan from the Scottish TV series “two doors down”. The main character Beth constantly has neighbours coming round expecting her to feed and water them.
On one occasion a neighbour “Alan” says yes to whatever is offered then when another neighbour comes round Alan nudges him and whispers “I’ve had a tea, a beer and a Sprite off her” or something similar, I couldn’t find the clip to post.

I like to cook for guests and do think it’s a compliment when they enjoy the food, your guests sound like they were just saying yes to anything for the sake of having it which is a bit odd.

I do think you need to take some of the comments you’ve had about feeding people up as appreciation or banter though, I often get accused of being a feeder but that’s better than my guests going hungry.
I used to visit someone who would make a sandwich and cut it into 4 between 4 people and put two bags of crisps in a bowl to share then we would all get a babybel and a single cream cracker for pudding, it was bizarre. We usually stayed for lunch and ate beforehand but on the one (and only) occasion we stayed for dinner we were offered a 9 inch pizza cut into 4 to share and one of the supermarket garlic baguettes between us. We weren’t offered the babybel as we “wouldn’t be able to manage it” as though we’d all eaten a large dominos pizza each.
They had plenty of money but had weird ideas about portion sizes!

Next time you have guests I’d offer less and if anyone mentions it then just say you don’t want to be responsible for them having diabetes. If the same guests visit then cut down on the portion sizes, cakes and puddings.
I hope you get offered the same hospitality back?

It’s generally considered tacky and ill-mannered to keep score of what others are eating.

you sound like a fantastic host!

What are you doing next weekend? Bagsy I stay at yours. Please.

You cooked offered amazing food.
They followed your lead but WERE gluttonous, I agree.

In future offer less. ie cake slices - no more than two each, on a plate, pudding after one meal one day, cheese after one meal another day, portion sizes the same for everyone and you serve. Breaky - choice of two cooked eggs, or tea and toast, or cereal. Food on hand for snacks to peck at - just plain biscuit, crackers and Marmite - not too many in jar and apples..

Do you have issues with food?

I'd find it really really strange if someone served a dessert by giving us each a hefty piece then splitting the same sized piece between two. Why not just cut it into how many serves it's meant to make, everyone takes one and can have more if there's any left over? You also seem very fixated on noting the quantity everyone eats, weirdly 'jokingly' offered scrambled eggs and half-heartedly offered cheese and biscuits then both times judged the guests for taking up your offer, and use pejorative phrases like 'pigging out'. Your OP reads as though you gazed at them open-mouthed all weekend, astonished that people could eat so much.

It's just a bit of banter. You obviously have a completely different sense of humour and take things literally.

It would probably be best if you didn't host people anymore as it's quite nasty how you are bitching about them.

Honestly reading your account of the food made me wonder if they had worms! They ate an obscene amount and it’s really rude to do that as guests! What is also really rude is to ask for your own cake when you stay with someone because someone else had it.

I think what you say about back handed compliments is a big issue here. I was wondering if you had an uneasy relationship with yourself and your food intake until you said about the bank handers.

Seems like you're really judging them for how much they ate, even though you kept offering them food. I think offering people dessert is completely normal but you sound really resentful of what they ate. I'm not sure why you offered to make them eggs after they had already eaten two helpings of breakfast, or jokingly offered them cheese if you didn't want to give it to them. When there is 5 adults eating, food does go quickly. Just dont host if you don't want people to eat food.

Are you a hobbit & your friends dwarves?

Learn how to take a compliment. They clearly loved your food, don’t get why you are twisting something positive into a negative. Be happy that they enjoyed themselves!

I had feeders in my family who would take it very personally if you didn’t eat everything they offered with OTT gusto.

If you didn’t finish your food you were deliberately insulting their hospitality. But if you cleaned your plate, they would forcefully insist you ate more, and wouldn’t take no for an answer, while also making it clear they thought you were kind of disgusting for eating so much, and bitching behind your back to relatives and friends about how you ran them ragged with all the cooking you expected them to do to service your insatiable appetite.

And if you said you liked a particular dish, they would serve it to you every single time you met for the next 40 years, alongside ‘joking’ comments like ‘DH begged me not to make yet another pavlova - he can’t stand the sight of them! - but I know they’re your favourite, so I suppose we all have to suffer!’ <angry tinkly laugh>

Food can turn into a horrendous catch-22 of martyrdom, and nothing you can do with this sort of host is right or enough. They see a veiled insult in every compliment. They want to stay in the position of perpetually wronged and resentful giver, while remaining a model of abstinent needlessness themselves. It’s exhausting.

Of course it’s possible OP just has the misfortune to be surrounded by people who are needlessly nasty her about her delicious baked goods 🤷‍♀️

It is as if I’ve just read a sequel to “The Very Hungry Caterpillar“ 😂
You come across as a very hospitable person, OP, while your guests are rather rude.

If course they ate what they did because they loved your food. Nobody would eat that much and go for seconds if they didn't like it or were a small eater.

If you found it stressful then just don't bake cakes and make puddings. Either don't serve any and tell them they're welcome to buy something for the next meal, or just make one cake and one pudding for the duration of the trip. Or literally just do jacket potatoes, salads or omelettes a couple nights and the rest eat out.

Over Easter, it's actually traditional to 'feast', it's the religious and cultural equivalent of Christmas. If someone said that they'd baked etc over Christmas, no-one would necessarily think it strange (personally I leave it to M&S).
OP, as said I think that you are taking it the wrong way. You've been a marvellous host. Just don't do as much, if it bothers you, going forward.

no need to twist the OP's word.

She says that she offered lots of food, but then got annoyed when she got negative comments about it. She never said the food was not too be eaten!

It just makes no sense at all that you thought they were eating too much and were clearly resentful about it but kept offering them more and more food!

Sounds like they have no self-control. They’re the kind of people who just say yes to everything and scoff whatever’s in front of them without stopping to think about whether they actually want it.
Then, when their stomach aches from being so distended, they can barely walk for feeling sick and can hardly fit into any of their clothes, it’s easier to make out they’ve been force fed than to admit they’ve been greedy bastards!

Don’t worry OP, it’s definitely them, not you!

The op loves to ‘joke’!

It’s still not clear why you kept offering them gargantuan amounts of food, including making three cakes over three days, and desserts after every dinner, and ‘jokingly’ offered them eggs and toast after they’d already had breakfast and again ‘jokingly’ offered them cheese and biscuits after their first dinner?

OP, sounds as though you’re a great cook, and I’d take it as a huge compliment that your guests polished off everything put in front of them. As far as lasagne is concerned, I have made huge lasagnes that I had thought might do two days, that are promptly demolished down to the last crumb on the first outing, together with copious quantities of garlic bread and an enormous salad - I think it’s just the nature of the beast. I understand why you’re piqued at being accused of overfeeding people, but in my experience men, particularly young men, have hollow legs as was clearly the case with your friends. I’d just be happy that they clearly enjoyed your cooking!

This thread is gold. 😂

Do peple also finish the entire pack of cornflakes - family size - and everything else on the table offered at breakfast? Just because "it would be rude not to"?