Parents hate the Childfree

Huh? but you made an entire post OP, raging about childfree people being hated on, online, so the exact same thing could be applied to YOU couldnt it?- why do you care if people hate on the childfree?

You clearly do care because you made this thread so WTF are you lecturing others that they shouldn't care when you clearly do yourself.

Bonkers.

I think that if shit parenting affects other people they have every right to weigh in, regardless of whether they have children or not. If you want “the village”, it goes both ways.

I don't hate the childfree at all. I think not having children is a valid and logical choice.

I hate when some childfree people act as though they should be entitled to a childfree world, and I hate when some childfree people campaign against parents getting support to raise children (subsidised childcare, paid parental leave.)

Whether or not you have children, children are a vital part of our society, and we will all one day rely on the current generation of children. Everyone- childfree or not- should value them and want their best interests.

I don’t care what choices people make. But when people who don’t have children start weighing in on how people should parent their children, that’s a problem.

you are on mumsnet too much @Tupelobound if you think that

I agree there does seem to be a lot of bitterness.

I think part of it is ignorance - some parents can’t even comprehend the fact that others might not like or enjoy the company of their precious little angels and must therefore be jealous.

There’s a thread someone’s started claiming people shouldn’t even say they don’t like children now because it’s somehow offensive. 🙄

But it’s often parents doing the complaining. You know, the parents who only like their own children.

I feel anyway that mums are too busy arguing with each other - older mums vs younger mums, stay at home mums vs working mums etc to have the energy to be bothered about those that don't have kids!

It is a bit like walking into a church and slagging off Christianity though. Not all people in there will necessarily be Christian and they won’t only talk about Christianity but most people would think it was inept and insensitive in that space.

People really love their children and most parents feel more strongly about them than pretty much anything else. That is why complaining about children, as if they are a unlikeable group, on what is a predominantly parenting site, is likely to go down like a lead balloon. The name ’Mumsnet’ is a big help on how to read the room. I usually assume posters on here who say they hate children are here to wind people up.

And in a more honest personal perspective I try to avoid this feeling but I never envied someone without children . Quite the opposite I often pity them . Sorry if this offends someone it’s not my intention , but the love you have for a child is something I couldn’t feel for anyone else , no my husband , not my parents or siblings or nephews . It’s something only a parent experiences and in that sense I feel sad that others will never experience it .

Being angry enough to use ‘the fuck’ generally implies that someone does care

And some parents seem to want to remind childfree people constantly of how empty and meaningless and unfulfilled their lives would be if they didn’t have children.

Oh great! Yet another thread about the childfree who want to wang on about it. God you lot are like fucking vegans. Give it a rest love!

@ThatNimblePeer why would it suit parents to believe that? Why the fuck would we care? I can easily imagine my life if I'd not had kids, sometimes I wish I had that life, mostly not. I certainly don't need people to want what I want to make me feel good.

You are spot on !If people don’t want or like children it’s up to them , it’s their right to choose . But demanding children to not participate in things simply because they are children is crazy . And nobody would go about it with any other group like old folk or disabled . So children and all that entails should not be expected to pander for those who don’t like them . In flights babies cry , in restaurantes kids laugh and are noisy etc . It’s part of being a child and if someone wants to live a completely child free life then the brunt of knowing how to isolate themselves from children is on them. Although I would say this is mostly a U.K. , USA thing and not my experience worldwide .

Oh yes. There's no one more judgemental than other parents. I went out a while ago with a group of friends who mostly had kids. One was discussing their brothers new girlfriend and were being so judgemental about her parenting. I sat there and said nothing.

This is so dumb. Substitute another group of people - the elderly, husbands, people with disabilities. You don't have the option to "only tolerate your own" because kids aren't pets or a lifestyle choice, they are human beings with the same rights as any other. Slightly different needs, as many groups have, but still human.

The UK is so child-intolerant it's unreal. Most of the world is not like that. I sometimes get the message from childfree people that they think the world is organised around families with kids when actually they are so judged and policed in public places.

I don't hate the childfree but since OP's stupid poll makes it a dichotomy, yeah I hear plenty of stuff on here and IRL sometimes from childfree people about kids that makes my blood boil so if there's only two choices then sure, I hate them.

It seems pretty obvious that the OP’s post doesn’t refer to people who wanted children, or wanted them under certain circumstances, and are in pain about not having them. Those people aren’t threatening to parents because they allow parents to feel superior and think of themselves as ‘the lucky ones’. OP is referring to people who didn’t have children because they didn’t want them. Yes it’s more complex or ambivalent to some, but some of this quibbling smacks of ‘I don’t believe anyone is genuinely childfree, they’re all hiding some pain about not having kids’. I can see why it suits parents to believe that, but that doesn’t automatically mean it’s the case.

Couldn't care less if someone is childfree.

Some childfree people seem to need to constantly remind people how awful they'd find parenting as if to justify it which is slightly annoying. If they're happy with their choice i'm not sure why they care.

And more often than not people don’t have kids because they like children but because they want their own child.

What a load of baloney OP, about 75% of my friends are childfree. It makes no difference to our friendship at all! They are all absolutely delightful to my child. In fact the only people who have made downright rude comments about kids/having kids have been parents themselves, which is quite sad tbh.

Being childfree doesn’t naturally mean disliking children

Oh yes I've had lots of comments from people assuming I don't like kids. Admittedly I didn't used to dislike kids but think it was because I didn't have much experience with them. Totally changed my mind when I became an aunty 26 years ago. I was in love with my first niece as soon as I saw her. And when played with other people's kids they've said you're so good with kids considering you don't like them. I do like them! But the assumption is that I don't because I chose not to have them.

Parent here, and a lot of my very close friends are childfree by choice, including my sister whom I am very close to. I do not care who has kids or not and why. I do find the lack of tolerance towards children pretty obnoxious at times, and I do find the lack of consideration of some parents when it comes to their kids' bad behaviour really shitty at times.

Mm. I'm not sure this is as much hate for the child free as yet another example of hate for older women. The ageist misogynists are typically kept busy yapping on about older mothers, out of touch, judgemental, controlling, possessive, selfish, demanding, mothers in law from hell etc. Looks like it's accured to them this leaves a whole pool of older women they haven't maligned. So enter a new trope - the child free older woman bitter because she always secretly wanted children. Do child free men get a mention at all...?

This is true re many topics!