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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think it's unacceptable to say you don't like children?

584 replies

BirdPlanet · 17/05/2025 09:23

Increasingly I've heard people saying some variation of the statement 'I don't like children'. I don't see why this is in any way acceptable. You wouldn't say that you 'don't like' any other category of person. If I said I didn't like the elderly or middle-aged women as a group, I'd get slapped down, yet somehow people think it's okay to talk about children as if they aren't human beings. Is it because they can't speak or advocate for themselves? Children aren't some kind of homogeneous entity. They have personalities and different temperaments, just as adults do.

Inevitably people will say that it's used as a shorthand for disliking the behaviour of some children, but even so, that’s more of a reflection of poor parenting than anything else.

OP posts:
Catladywithoutacat · 17/05/2025 22:58

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 17/05/2025 22:55

Its not that I don’t like them, I just find children boring. I have to make a huge effort with nieces and nephews. I genuinely have no interest in them.

I think this is fine though it's more those people who say they hate kids or dislike them having no interest in things isn't an issue

Catladywithoutacat · 17/05/2025 22:56

It's weird like people who dont like animals, just because you choose to not have children or animals saying you dislike them or hate them is just weird and a massive red flag

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 17/05/2025 22:55

Its not that I don’t like them, I just find children boring. I have to make a huge effort with nieces and nephews. I genuinely have no interest in them.

RFRose · 17/05/2025 22:51

It’s only when you travel abroad, or spend time with people from other cultures that you realise how weird the British views towards children are.
It’s as if Brits would prefer a fully grown adult to pop out at birth, and anything before this is unacceptable.
We’ve all been around those types who ‘tut’ at just the mere sight of a child, and this seems to be more and more common sadly.
I love visiting countries which have a more accepting view of kids and families - it reminds me that the UK is abnormal on this topic and that it’s not the norm in most other places.

Snoringdogsfarting · 17/05/2025 22:42

I don’t really like cats . I also don’t really like children.

JohnAmendAll · 17/05/2025 22:00

YABU, Who are you to police what people say?

Livelovebehappy · 17/05/2025 21:44

There are so many ‘adult only’ places - hotels, cruises, that I guess that means there’s also a lot of people who don’t like children in their spaces. I wouldn’t say I dislike children, but I dislike them being in my personal space, which is maybe what some people mean when they say they don’t like them?

MsCactus · 17/05/2025 21:40

AzureOtter · 17/05/2025 19:32

You are seriously suggesting that someone saying they don't like children is in any way similar to Nazism? and could lead to genocide?

It's not derogatory to say you don't like children or any group.

You are so offensive, and so ridiculous and need to get the hell off the internet because you have no idea about history or anything else.

I'm embarrassed for you.

No - I'm saying that saying derogatory things about an entire group of people changes how people think about them and how people treat them.

This is a fact - there's countless examples throughout history. And children are a vulnerable group - unable to have power or make their own choices or live independently, reliant on others to survive. They're very vulnerable.

I think I've struck a nerve because you've started just insulting me rather than actually arguing the point that it's apparently fine to say you dislike an entire group of vulnerable people.

user1476613140 · 17/05/2025 21:40

DH's sister doesn't like children. She doesn't have any herself. And is single.

BonBon20 · 17/05/2025 21:36

Vivi0 · 17/05/2025 21:32

Maybe she just doesn’t like childless women.

That’s the impression I’m getting 😆. I’ve never stood around complaining about pregnant women nor have my childless friends. Not sure why that group has been pulled into it!

Vivi0 · 17/05/2025 21:32

BonBon20 · 17/05/2025 21:10

What’s that supposed to mean? You think childless women (note childless not childfree, not that the distinction should matter either way) stand around bitching about pregnant women? Or have I misunderstood you?

Maybe she just doesn’t like childless women.

proximalhumerous · 17/05/2025 21:29

BonBon20 · 17/05/2025 21:10

What’s that supposed to mean? You think childless women (note childless not childfree, not that the distinction should matter either way) stand around bitching about pregnant women? Or have I misunderstood you?

Yes, I think that childless women occasionally make less than flattering remarks about pregnant women as a group, when in a "safe space". Garfunkel and Oats even have a song about it.

I also think that women sometimes make less than complimentary remarks about men, younger people sometimes make less than complimentary remarks about middle-aged people, older people sometimes make derogatory remarks about young people, etc.

It might not be particularly laudable, but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

LimitedBrightSpots · 17/05/2025 21:27

Grunochre · 17/05/2025 21:16

I don’t enjoy being around kids no matter how well behaved they are. I get bored around them.

I feel the same about old people.

Grunochre · 17/05/2025 21:16

I don’t enjoy being around kids no matter how well behaved they are. I get bored around them.

BonBon20 · 17/05/2025 21:10

proximalhumerous · 17/05/2025 20:47

You've obviously never been to a gathering of childless women...

What’s that supposed to mean? You think childless women (note childless not childfree, not that the distinction should matter either way) stand around bitching about pregnant women? Or have I misunderstood you?

proximalhumerous · 17/05/2025 20:47

dijonketchup · 17/05/2025 09:28

Agreed, and posted a variation of this on another thread recently. People without children seem to forget that they are just small people? No one ever says “pregnant women, they drive me mad” or similar in public about humans in a different life stage. FFS, you were a child yourself.

You've obviously never been to a gathering of childless women...

Rumbley · 17/05/2025 20:20

ohyesido · 17/05/2025 20:18

@Rumbley here, have the last word. My gift to you Grin

Thank you

ohyesido · 17/05/2025 20:18

@Rumbley here, have the last word. My gift to you Grin

Rumbley · 17/05/2025 20:17

ohyesido · 17/05/2025 20:14

@Rumbleythanks bestie

Unfortunately I read your thread where you say you “care about no one” (sad given you have a child and grandchild) and manipulate people and “pretend“ to be a good person, to but actually “everything I do is calculated to benefit me”…. So… sob😥… i doubt i really am.

ohyesido · 17/05/2025 20:14

@Rumbleythanks bestie

Rumbley · 17/05/2025 20:13

ohyesido · 17/05/2025 20:12

@Rumbleywhat’s it to you? I liked my own child fine, I like his child my grandson too. Do I need to specify that to you or can something go without saying?

Phew! (Even if you describe your own child as “even more self-serving than me”!)

ohyesido · 17/05/2025 20:12

@Rumbleywhat’s it to you? I liked my own child fine, I like his child my grandson too. Do I need to specify that to you or can something go without saying?

Psychologymam · 17/05/2025 20:11

TheMeasure · 17/05/2025 09:28

Well, I don't much care for badly-behaved (or rather, badly-brought-up) children.
But then, I do see a lot of them in my line of work.

I don’t care much for badly behaved adults either but I see a lot of them in my life.

AllPlayedOut · 17/05/2025 20:09

I don’t normally tell people that I don’t like kids unless they’re bothering me about not having them but this afternoon I’d have happily told the parents of the 8 or 9 year old boy who trampled all over my front garden and plants, that I don’t like children or shit parents.(They didn’t say a word to him) My tolerance for children grows thinner by the day thanks to parents and children like that.

Rumbley · 17/05/2025 20:08

ohyesido · 17/05/2025 20:06

@Rumbley you do that, do it twice if you want

Sweet Jesus

You have a child

did you at least like your own child @ohyesido

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