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AIBU?

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Original poster

Full specialist or ASD unit attached to mainstream?

66 replies

Ricecakesaremyjam · 16/05/2025 14:11

5yr old DS, diagnosed ASD and ADHD. Has an EHCP and 1:1 in mainstream primary reception class, been a complete shitshow and he has been made to attend for just 2hrs a day the entire time. At annual review school will agree they can’t meet need and request a change of placement.
He is clever, kind, loves to make people laugh - but also shows huge impulsivity, total
lack of danger awareness and has outbursts at school when things aren’t as he expects them to be or during any moments of transition.
This is where I’m stuck - full specialist or ASD unit attached to mainstream?
There’s pro’s and cons of both.
If he doesn’t cope in a tiny village primary I can’t see it being easier for him in a larger mainstream school with a unit attached. BUT I keep getting warned that he could pick up behavioural issues if he attends a specialist school.
I just don’t know what to do - no specialist provisions allow you to visit without having already named them on the EHCP so I feel like I’m being asked to make a huge decision totally blind.
any advice would be so appreciated. Thankyou x

OP posts:
Mammia18283 · 16/05/2025 18:13

How is he socially?

Visit the school choices you have. Ask them what they can do to make things work for your child. Ask about other kids they have with similar needs, what worked for them. Ask how stretched they are for resources.

Jellycatspyjamas · 16/05/2025 18:12

My DD is in specialist provision which is good in some ways, it if I had my time again I’d aim for mainstream with a specialist unit. All of the kids she is friends with have some form of social or communication difficulties which really impacts her social skills. In mainstream the mix of kids means the communication difficulties are diluted a bit and she would learn through more common relationship dynamics, rather than every situation being complicated by the mix of additional support needs. It may not be an issue when he’s young, but in teenage years it’s certainly added colour to her friendships and not in a good way.

EilonwyWithRedGoldHair · 16/05/2025 18:11

Have you got anyone to discuss with what the options are and what the different settings can offer your child?

DS wasn't offered a place in a special school at primary because it was felt he was too academic for it, he ended up in a small unit for children with additional needs attached to a mainstream primary.

He's now in secondary and in a specialist ASD base within a mainstream secondary, where, as others have said, he can attend mainstream lessons if he's able/in the subjects that interest him most.

whynotmereally · 16/05/2025 18:10

Are you paying for this? If not you may not get a lot of choice and the school/local authority will decide. I’d choose a asd unit if it was my son but he’s boarderline for mainstream/sen school and academic. A lot of people I know who have children in Sen school say it’s been the best thing for their child.

BillyWind · 16/05/2025 18:07

Actually, I did go and look round a specialist primary school. I just called up and explained our situation and we were shown round by SLT. Have you tried that?

lanadelgrey · 16/05/2025 18:06

Go and see the proposed offers and you’ll be a better judge as to where DS best fits

BillyWind · 16/05/2025 18:04

BillyWind · 16/05/2025 18:01

Hi.
We are in a similar position: 6 year old DS in mainstream and he's out of class and has been since Xmas, so we're starting to look at different providers.
Has 1:1 and individual timetable but was unhappy hence us starting looking.... but... In the last 4 weeks he has really settled and starting to access more, been playing with others... And one of his biggest triggers is other children being emotional/crying which we think he may encounter more in a specialist provision.
It's so hard to know what to do for the best.

Sorry, no answers... but solidarity!

Original poster
Ricecakesaremyjam · 16/05/2025 18:02

@BillyWind 100%. I really don’t know what to do

OP posts:
BillyWind · 16/05/2025 18:01

Hi.
We are in a similar position: 6 year old DS in mainstream and he's out of class and has been since Xmas, so we're starting to look at different providers.
Has 1:1 and individual timetable but was unhappy hence us starting looking.... but... In the last 4 weeks he has really settled and starting to access more, been playing with others... And one of his biggest triggers is other children being emotional/crying which we think he may encounter more in a specialist provision.
It's so hard to know what to do for the best.

Original poster
Ricecakesaremyjam · 16/05/2025 18:01

Despite only being in school 2hrs a day and spending most of that time playing with Lego; he isn’t actually behind. He can read at the expected level, can write some words, can count etc. I don’t want him to lose his academic potential but I am also very aware that if he’s made to continue in mainstream his mental health would be at risk as he gets older. So basically looking for a specialist school for high functioning ASD kids. Getting him into one is another matter though isn’t it 🫣

OP posts:
FieldInWhichFucksAreGrownIsBarren · 16/05/2025 18:00

Personally I'd go full specialist. I say this as someone who works within education.

PurpleThistle7 · 16/05/2025 17:57

How is he getting on academically? My friend’s son is at a specialist unit within a high school and the benefit is that he can attend classes in the non specialist unit when suitable. As science is a special interest it’s really great to give him the opportunity to learn in different ways.

Original poster
Ricecakesaremyjam · 16/05/2025 17:56

Hi, thanks for your reply. Yes he is medicated - it wears off so quickly though. Just been given a 5mg top up for lunchtime. I think in view of his age they are reluctant to up the dosage too much.
He is becoming overstimulated, disregulated and lashing out and I’m so worried he’s going to start getting suspended etc

OP posts:
DrRuthGalloway · 16/05/2025 17:54

What type of curriculum is on offer at each? If he needs a mainstream level curriculum is that on offer in specialist? What is the peer group at each?

MrsKateColumbo · 16/05/2025 17:54

Is your child medicated for ADHD? DS was a bit "up and down" pre med but having the medication at school has totallt changed things... just something to consider.

What county are you?

You can view units before naming anywhere (i did this year)

Original poster
Ricecakesaremyjam · 16/05/2025 17:51

Anyone? 🫣

OP posts: