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AIBU?

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New neighbours complaining about our toilet

342 replies

Amanda98 · 16/05/2025 13:30

We’ve got a new build where one side of our house completely backs on to a neighbours garden - that’s the back wall/boundary of their garden essentially.

Downstairs, we have a toilet with a window which is on the side of the house where that wall is, and has a small window which opens at the top. Their garden is slightly lowered so it isn’t within reaching distance. It’s a fairly odd design but we’ve lived here for years with no issues.

The neighbours have recently changed. In one of the early weeks in April when it was warm, they put a note through the door which asked we keep the window closed when it’s sunny because of the smell. We don’t really open it much anyway so thought nothing of it.

We’ve since had a further note through this week asking it stays closed on Saturday because they are hosting a BBQ for a family members birthday. We also have family over on Saturday and the downstairs loo is the one they’d naturally use.

Are the neighbours being CF? They surely can’t expect us to introduce a rule where we only crap upstairs whenever they say so!

OP posts:
TatteredAndTorn · 17/05/2025 04:19

I don’t think they asking that it’s not used just that the window stays shut. Which tbh isn’t a big ask. I rarely open ours. And if it stinks, why would you want to share that with a whole garden full of neighbours and their guests! Keep it to yourself!

PickAChew · 16/05/2025 23:47

Our most used toilet is downstairs and faces our back garden. Never in 7.5 years have I noticed a smell from the garden.

TheHerboriste · 16/05/2025 23:43

doodleschnoodle · 16/05/2025 15:26

But yes honestly it’s horrible and for someone to get over the embarrassment to let a neighbour know, it must be pretty bad. Most people wouldn’t want to approach a neighbour about the smell of their poo unnecessarily. I personally wouldn’t want to use a toilet where my shit smells are wafting over neighbours.

Yes. Walk upstairs to use the toilet.

Especially if they eating.

PawsAndTails · 16/05/2025 22:47

DrPrunesqualer · 16/05/2025 22:42

If it was a drain issue it would be lingering all the time.
OP wouldn’t have got a note about a specific date then.

Plus
If it’s a drain issue from OPs toilet then it’s still OPs problem.

Yes, I'd want to know if I had a drain issue, but you're right, it would be a persistent issue rather than a specific date issue. Neighbour's must have very sensitive noses.

DrPrunesqualer · 16/05/2025 22:42

PawsAndTails · 16/05/2025 22:38

Depending if the issue is actually poo time (in which case the neighbour has to deal with it as how long can it last? A few wafts?) or something more persistent that is an actual plumbing problem.

If it was a drain issue it would be lingering all the time.
OP wouldn’t have got a note about a specific date then.

Plus
If it’s a drain issue from OPs toilet then it’s still OPs problem.

Todayisaday · 16/05/2025 22:39

Are they nuerodiverse? Potentially they have undiagnised sensory issues and have noses akin to a sniffer dog.
They might also be neighbours from hell, and next thing they will be trying to claim your toilet as their own land by smearing their own shit on your wall as territory markers.
I suggest you first call the police on them for slander and then move house immediately to a house with no neighbours in the middle of the country, not before taking a dump on their lawn. That will teach the CFs.

PawsAndTails · 16/05/2025 22:38

DrPrunesqualer · 16/05/2025 22:34

That would probably have to be timed with OPs family poo time though
For the full on effect

Depending if the issue is actually poo time (in which case the neighbour has to deal with it as how long can it last? A few wafts?) or something more persistent that is an actual plumbing problem.

DrPrunesqualer · 16/05/2025 22:34

PawsAndTails · 16/05/2025 22:31

I'd probably ask to go around and smell what they are smelling. Either they are nuts or there's something wrong with your toilet that you can't tell from your side, in which case you may need a plumber.

That would probably have to be timed with OPs family poo time though
For the full on effect

PawsAndTails · 16/05/2025 22:31

I'd probably ask to go around and smell what they are smelling. Either they are nuts or there's something wrong with your toilet that you can't tell from your side, in which case you may need a plumber.

Motheroffive999 · 16/05/2025 22:24

Go round and ask if it is a poo or wee smell?

WildflowerConstellations · 16/05/2025 22:08

I don't think they're unreasonable actually as you have multiple toilets and it must smell like someone endlessly shitting in their garden

Seamond · 16/05/2025 21:57

Our downstairs loo is right at the back of the house, what used to be the rear hallway, almost outside so DH is encouraged to use that one as there are two doors between it and the utility room, it is bit chilly in winter though. I guess a lot of downstairs loos are nearer the living areas so not used for poos so much

MamaLenny · 16/05/2025 21:57

With three sons my guess would be there's a urine smell.

So brazen of them to write notes though!

Emonade · 16/05/2025 21:44

spoonbillstretford · 16/05/2025 14:18

Simon and Garfunkel Earworm

Hello darkness, my old friend
I've come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of ...

😂😂😂😂😂

Foolsgold74 · 16/05/2025 21:35

Lucelady · 16/05/2025 18:14

I have three friends that use my downstairs loo each week for a poo, one doesn't check the flush properly and it's the size of something a Great Dane would leave. I have an extractor fan but the most successful pong purger has been an Aldi nectarine diffuser. The husband is not allowed the ensuite as he has an arse like a drain, it is for wees only. Do I get a MN badge?

How is this situation even occurring? Do they come round purposefully to poo at your house? I just simply wouldn't have people round who use my facilities to poo every week.

notprincehamlet · 16/05/2025 21:24

We know a farm who had neighbours complain that they didn’t like having ro
watch cows wee out of the dining room window

Cows can wee out of windows?? Every day's a school day!

Foolsgold74 · 16/05/2025 21:19

Oneday24 · 16/05/2025 16:09

Oh I’d be mortified if I received that note 😅I have to say though, I’ve always thought it was good etiquette to only use the downstairs loo for wee’s! If it was me I’d honestly leave the window shit or tell the family to not use it for no 2’s. I don’t think anyone buys a house and thinks that would become an issue even if the window is in a daft place!

No wonder the neighbours are complaining if they're doing a window shit...

BeavisMcTavish · 16/05/2025 21:07

Isn’t the question why your loo stinks? Shouldn’t smell at all - surely you can smell it inside too? 😷

Nikki75 · 16/05/2025 20:45

Ignore them.

SunnySideDeepDown · 16/05/2025 20:34

HoppingPavlova · 16/05/2025 13:56

Honestly, some people’s poo just really stinks. Our household has the same diet yet the smell that comes from the bathroom when DH has been there could clear a suburb. With the rest of us, it’s just a ‘normal’ poo smell. Nothing physically wrong with him though. However, even if it is a case like this, the neighbours are still out of order asking the window be kept shut, it would obviously need to be open to clear the smell faster!

Totally. I have a husband and three kids, all eat roughly the same. My poo stinks the most, followed closely by my sons. My husband and daughters is far less stinky.

One of my parents in far worse than the other.

It’s not a slight on the person - we can’t help our shit stinking, in the same way no one can control how pretty they’re born.

Having said that OP - if they have guests in the garden, I think it’s ok that they don’t want to hear or smell your family shitting while they’re trying to eat and socialise. New builds have loads of toilets, can’t you use another for 5 hours?

blubberyboo · 16/05/2025 20:32

Can you not build a fence up higher so that they can't see when your window is open?

Also the reek from their BBQ on Saturday will probably stink your house out so maybe best keep window closed for your benefit!

How about putting one of those battery sprays on the windowsill so that they get a whiff of roses.

Lifealittleboulder · 16/05/2025 20:29

We live on a farm, and one family who border one of our fields asked us not to spread slurry for a week because they were having a bbq and the smell is horrible.
my old farmer father in law informed in no uncertain terms them that possibly the countryside had been the wrong choice then…
people are nuts. We know a farm who had neighbours complain that they didn’t like having ro
watch cows wee out of the dining room window..

Tigergirl80 · 16/05/2025 20:29

notprincehamlet · 16/05/2025 15:38

It’s a power move by them
This! They've bought a house that's overlooked and they won't be happy until the window's bricked up. Time for some passive aggressive topiary.

Reminds me of them gnomes from B&M bent over showing their arses. I’m sure the arses are solar powered and light up in the dark.😂😂😂

Tigergirl80 · 16/05/2025 20:23

Get some VIPoo spray in toilet after a number 2. Gets rid of 💩 smell and tell your neighbours to get a life. 😂😂😂

Annascaul · 16/05/2025 20:18

PinkyFlamingo · 16/05/2025 19:57

It really isn't something that can be controlled!

It can be contained, though.
Why let it waft into someone else’s space?