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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to take my dog everywhere I go

187 replies

Loopylouloves · 16/05/2025 12:35

After several posts recently about dogs in public spaces I wanted to add another angle. For context I wasnt a dog lover and never thought I would own one. However I am now the owner of one but with a difference. I have a serious medical condition which causes me to become very unwell quickly and my dog is being trained to detect when this is about to happen so I can take action promptly and get help. She goes everywhere with me including supermarkets, cafes, friends houses etc.

The issue is that shes a puppy (12 months) and is very much in the training phase so sometimes she doesnt behave when we go out. But its so important that she lives my life with me so she learns to alert me even when we are out and about. Once fully trained she is going to change my life and give me so much freedom and peace of mind.

Because she doesnt always behave like a service dog should, aibu to think that people should be more understanding and tolerant of her.

OP posts:

Original poster

Loopylouloves · 16/05/2025 14:41

amigafan2003 · 16/05/2025 14:30

Do you ask your friends first?

I wouldn't be very impressed if one of my friends turned up at my house with a dog (and they wouldn't be coming in or even in the back garden).

Show quote history

She's well behaved in people's houses. It's mainly when outside with lots of distractions.
Most of my friends have visited me in intensive care so are really supportive of me having something that could prevent that. If my friends were not impressed by needing her to be with me then I would question the sort of person they were.

OP posts:

rosemarble · 16/05/2025 14:41

Surely the charity have advised you on what you should be doing when the puppy is with you.

Original poster

Loopylouloves · 16/05/2025 14:36

WhereYouLeftIt · 16/05/2025 13:13

YANBU to take your dog everywhere you go. But neither is anyone else BU if they refuse to allow your dog in. When it's a service dog, by law public places must permit it. But it isn't a service dog yet - and "sometimes she doesnt behave when we go out", so when she doesn't behave do you remove her from wherever you are? Are you upholding your end of the social contract?

I understand that and always ask if it's OK to bring her in and explain she's training. With regards to the behaviour, actually I'm not supposed to remove her but teach her what she should be doing. But based on comments here it seems she's actually very well behaved, which makes me feel better.

OP posts:

Original poster

Loopylouloves · 16/05/2025 14:32

Doveyouknow · 16/05/2025 12:40

Probably depends what you mean by doesn't behave. A relative is incredibly allergic to dogs (carries an epi pen). It would be a problem for them if your dog jumped up at them. So I would say if you can't stop that happening you shouldn't be taking them everywhere. Similarly if they are not toilet trained clearly indoors spaced are not acceptable.

I can sympathise completely as carry a few myself. No she doesn't jump up at people and if someone let me know they were allergic I would move away from them and if this wasn't possible I would leave.

OP posts:

amigafan2003 · 16/05/2025 14:30

Loopylouloves · 16/05/2025 12:35

Because she doesnt always behave like a service dog should, aibu to think that people should be more understanding and tolerant of her.

Do you ask your friends first?

I wouldn't be very impressed if one of my friends turned up at my house with a dog (and they wouldn't be coming in or even in the back garden).

Original poster

Loopylouloves · 16/05/2025 14:27

Just to clarify a few things, the charity can train a dog for you so would be fully trained and ready to go, they will also train your dog. I chose that route because having never had a dog before I was worried I wouldn't bond with the dog. As I said before I'm not a dog person so this felt important to me.

The charity are amazing and work very closely with us. They are impressed by how well behaved and how quickly my dog is learning. She goes to their training centre and is doing really well. There are certain targets she needs to hit and she's doing well with these.

Most people who meet her are impressed with her behaviour and when I compare her to other dogs I can see she is. Maybe I've just been unlucky that the few times she's gone rougue it's been around people who don't like dogs.

Her 'naughty' behaviours are not settling in public spaces as in laying down quietly. This mainly bothers me. Apparently this is one of the hardest things to do in a very young dog and I'd say we are 60% there. She's never been a barky dog but if something scares her or startles her she will bark, only once and is quickly settled. There are just a few niggly issues I'm working on and again the charity are amazing with their advice.

OP posts:

Botanybaby · 16/05/2025 14:10

Never heard of a service dog being trained by the person. They are helping

Melsy88 · 16/05/2025 13:55

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Lets just hope you pick the wrong dog to do that to and they react appropriately - you vile person

Gymmum82 · 16/05/2025 13:51

You can’t just pick a puppy and decide it’s a service dog. Do you know how many dogs the guide dogs fail because they are not able to meet the standards (it’s a lot)
This may well happen to your puppy, it sounds like you’re not really aware of how t train a dog to be a good dog. You’re just taking her everywhere and hoping for the best.
Maybe you should get additional services from a dog trainer as well as the charity so your dog is less of a PITA when you go out

BangersAndGnash · 16/05/2025 13:51

It depends.

Into church during friend’s wedding vows or baby’s Christening, probably not.

Ditto into the cinema, theatre, the V&A, dinner at a new friend’s who has cream carpets and sofa, Michelin starred restaurant.

Bbq of good friends and family who understand your situation, park cafe, fine.

Even people who take their dogs into John Lewis and dog friendly restaurants don’t take partly or untrained puppies.

Deploy common sense.

DysmalRadius · 16/05/2025 13:45

Surely the specialist charity training the dog is best placed to advise on where to take it at each stage of the training journey aren't they?

I'm allergic to service dogs as much as any others, so if it's not yet trained not to jump up at strangers, then I would stick to places where that can't happen for now.

MaidOfSteel · 16/05/2025 13:43

As long as it’s clear that she’s a service-dog in training, then most people will cut you some slack. Even dog loathers like me!

Wolfiefan · 16/05/2025 13:43

So she isn’t yet a service dog and won’t act like one but you want everyone to treat her as if she is. YABU

Springtime43 · 16/05/2025 13:42

Toddlerteaplease · 16/05/2025 13:40

since she’s not a proper service dog. Yes YABU. I know people who use the service dog excuse to take their dog everywhere.

This. So many dog owners insist on taking their dogs everywhere, and making it everyone else's problem.

Viviennemary · 16/05/2025 13:41

The dog obviously needs more training so it can behave properly when out and about. Or else perhaps it just isnt suitable for this kind of role. USually service dogs are very well behaved.

Toddlerteaplease · 16/05/2025 13:40

since she’s not a proper service dog. Yes YABU. I know people who use the service dog excuse to take their dog everywhere.

CoubousAndTourmalet · 16/05/2025 13:38

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Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Great idea! You'll either be sued, or you'll get yourself smacked in the head with a stick 😏

CoubousAndTourmalet · 16/05/2025 13:35

Pyew · 16/05/2025 13:21

Sounds like your dog identifies as a service dog, rather than being one. Just stick to the rules hun.

Have you read the full thread, "hun?". Might be an idea 🙄

LoveWine123 · 16/05/2025 13:33

What does she do that you feel people should tolerate more? Can you provide examples?

TwoTailFly · 16/05/2025 13:27

I think YABU only because legally an assistance dog in training has no more rights than a pet dog (I used to work at an assistance dog charity). It's why charities like Guide Dogs will work with cinema chains or theatres etc to host trainee dogs for specially put on events. So yeah, just because your dog has a vest, it doesn't give you the right to go in non- dog friendly businesses and if you do then you need to be okay with being asked to leave.

PiggyPigalle · 16/05/2025 13:27

Did you buy/choose your puppy or did the charity acquire it for you?

ThinWomansBrain · 16/05/2025 13:23

@Ablondiebutagoody name change probably appropriate - goody? really?
if it happens hopefully you'll be arrested, charged and imprisoned.

Dearg · 16/05/2025 13:23

I think if she’s genuinely in training then you will have been given the rules to stick to by the agency .

However, in my experience, it’s good for all dogs to be trained to be comfortable being left alone.

Plus , training or not, if the dog misbehaves, you should remove it from the situation.

Cherrypies · 16/05/2025 13:21

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You are anything but a goody, smack a dog in the head with a stick, that's called animal abuse.
I dont agree with untrained dogs running around, and it causes a lot of issues for my leashed dog at all times, unless in an enclosed field.
But hurt a dog, who is not at fault, it's the owners, borders on psychotic. Why dont you smack the owners, oh, they could hit back.

Pyew · 16/05/2025 13:21

Sounds like your dog identifies as a service dog, rather than being one. Just stick to the rules hun.

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