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What’s your opinion on adults telling children their emotions

62 replies

Yolomy · 16/05/2025 10:23

Not said in jest or in a silly way, said seriously, to child regularly. Variations of the below phrases, parent to child after not seeing them for a few days:

I missed you so much all I did was cry

I cried the whole time I didn’t see you as I missed you

I have been crying every day when you weren’t here

I cry when I am not with you as I miss you so badly

OP posts:
PurpleThistle7 · 16/05/2025 10:38

I don’t know which vote is which but this is a terrible amount of pressure to put on a child

Bodonka · 16/05/2025 10:37

I think it’s emotionally abusive. My mum said this kind of thing all the time and I grew up feeling a) responsible for her emotions and b) guilty for ever wanting to do anything without her. It stunted me socially a lot.

FreezeDriedStrawberries · 16/05/2025 10:37

BallerinaFall · 16/05/2025 10:24

That would be emotional abuse

This.

unlimiteddilutingjuice · 16/05/2025 10:36

It's not OK.

Instead, the parent could have said something like:

"I was thinking about you and hoping you were having a lovely time"

Happyinarcon · 16/05/2025 10:35

There’s a difference between sharing emotions and guilt tripping

WokeMarxistPope · 16/05/2025 10:32

If it's the parent, it's an awful way to talk to your kids. If it's a grandparent, the parent can react to show the child that this isn't a good idea.

Grammarninja · 16/05/2025 10:31

SnowFrogJelly · 16/05/2025 10:26

It’s over the top but not emotional abuse

It is emotionally abusive but hopefully not intended to be.

Squarestones · 16/05/2025 10:28

With just that info I'd say this is not a healthy/appropriate way to talk with kids. If nothing else it's surely not true - presume the parent isn't actually crying all day.

However I do think fine to discuss emotions in an appropriate way - appropriate both in terms of their age and in terms of healthy boundaries/relationships between you

Tourmalines · 16/05/2025 10:26

that’s abusive and does nothing but cause anxiety for the kids .

SnowFrogJelly · 16/05/2025 10:26

It’s over the top but not emotional abuse

Size222offToHonolulu · 16/05/2025 10:24

Inappropriate and manipulative, very immature behaviour.

BallerinaFall · 16/05/2025 10:24

That would be emotional abuse

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