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AIBU?

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Original poster

Would you complain?

89 replies

Galaxyca · 15/05/2025 16:28

I took my baby to a GP appointment today regarding a rash under their chin after beginning weaning. Baby was lying on the bed and we needed them to look up so the doctor could see. I dug my keys on phone out my pocket and dangled them in the air, and tapped my screen so that the screensaver photo came on (baby smiled and looked up, so this worked.

He glanced for half a second under her chin and said straight faced, ‘parenting tip here for you, do not let them look at your phone’. I laughed thinking it was a joke but it was obvious from his expression that it wasn’t. I’ve thought on it and I feel a bit annoyed to be honest. Even if I were playing cartoons, he is there to look at a medical concern and not comment on anything else. I am a younger mum and left DH in the car and wonder if either of that was different perhaps he wouldn’t have said it.

AIBU to feed it back? I don’t want to be that person but I do think it was out of order and an arrogant thing to say, however minor a comment

OP posts:
Soyfinger · 16/05/2025 08:00

purpleme12 · 16/05/2025 07:57

I'm not sure what you mean when you say 'I didn't say the initial post' but I'm not pissed off any huge amounts no

And no I didn't say 'very'

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Ok to be clear

you said “wow” you’d be “pissed off” and found it “patronising”

my view and the other of another poster is if you get worked up and pissed off about this, life must be tough (and a bit depressing!) because you must go around feeling pissed off about quite a lot in life

understand?!

PansyPottering · 16/05/2025 07:59

I really feel that if you complain you are going to probably end up feeling worse rather than better.

The practice is going to have to respond to the complaint, provide with evidence of why an eight month old baby is should not be distracted and entertained by phones. And your ‘defence’ is going to be that you weren’t.

And they are going to say that in the opinion of the doctor you were.

purpleme12 · 16/05/2025 07:58

Ellejay67 · 16/05/2025 07:57

How is a comment such the one the poster has commented, tough?

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What do you mean, I haven't said anyone's comment is tough?

purpleme12 · 16/05/2025 07:57

Soyfinger · 16/05/2025 07:54

I didn’t say the initial post

but if you find this patronising and you’d be “very pissed off”, you must be very pissed off a lot in life! 😂

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I'm not sure what you mean when you say 'I didn't say the initial post' but I'm not pissed off any huge amounts no

And no I didn't say 'very'

Ellejay67 · 16/05/2025 07:57

purpleme12 · 16/05/2025 07:50

Only when tough things happen in life. Which is pretty standard for everyone

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How is a comment such the one the poster has commented, tough?

dointhebestwecan · 16/05/2025 07:56

‘Twas a good bit of mansplaining - you need your response prepared for the millions of times this happens - thank you so much for your advice - how would I ever have managed without it’

Soyfinger · 16/05/2025 07:54

purpleme12 · 16/05/2025 07:53

No I didn't say it was a tough time in life at all. You mentioned having a tough life. And equated it to having a tough life. Tough times in life are very different from things that might piss you off a bit in life every so often.

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I didn’t say the initial post

but if you find this patronising and you’d be “very pissed off”, you must be very pissed off a lot in life! 😂

purpleme12 · 16/05/2025 07:53

Soyfinger · 16/05/2025 07:51

And you regard this as “tough”?

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No I didn't say it was a tough time in life at all. You mentioned having a tough life. And equated it to having a tough life. Tough times in life are very different from things that might piss you off a bit in life every so often.

Soyfinger · 16/05/2025 07:51

purpleme12 · 16/05/2025 07:50

Only when tough things happen in life. Which is pretty standard for everyone

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And you regard this as “tough”?

WomenInSTEM · 16/05/2025 07:50

The doctor was right.

Look up the affect of screens on developing eyesight.

purpleme12 · 16/05/2025 07:50

Ellejay67 · 16/05/2025 07:48

Blimey...life is tough for you

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Only when tough things happen in life. Which is pretty standard for everyone

Ellejay67 · 16/05/2025 07:48

purpleme12 · 15/05/2025 16:36

Wow I'd be pissed off to be honest

I'd find it patronising

Don't know if I'd be pissed off enough to make a complaint

Blimey...life is tough for you

Soyfinger · 16/05/2025 07:23

CheFaro · 16/05/2025 06:45

He’d be more able to ease the baby’s discomfort if he didn’t stop to deliver unsought parenting lessons, based on his perception of the OP’s inadequate parenting,

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Goodness, drama llama 😆

BurnoutGP · 16/05/2025 07:17

Really? Complain? Sigh

GravyBoots · 16/05/2025 07:01

Anyway, has the rash cleared up?

GravyBoots · 16/05/2025 07:00

My first thought was that it was lighthearted, as in - once baby has clocked that it's entertaining, you'll never be able to use your phone in peace again.
I only thought this because of the mention of keys... Nobody had a mobile phone when my eldest was born, but all babies wanted the keys! Not their own colourful safe plastic ones no. They had to be the foul tasting, filthy, gum splitting house and car keys that jangled so wonderfully together!

Maybe he was being a patronising arsehole, but either way, don't give it any more headspace and don't stress yourself over complaining.

Once you become a parent, everybody thinks it's their right to voice their opinion, asked for or not 🙄

CheFaro · 16/05/2025 06:45

Soyfinger · 16/05/2025 06:38

Can’t imagine being like that towards someone I’m hoping can help ease my baby’s discomfort

each to their own

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He’d be more able to ease the baby’s discomfort if he didn’t stop to deliver unsought parenting lessons, based on his perception of the OP’s inadequate parenting,

Soyfinger · 16/05/2025 06:38

CheFaro · 15/05/2025 18:24

I’d have suggested he stuck to the medical side of things and got on with diagnosing the baby’s rash.

Can’t imagine being like that towards someone I’m hoping can help ease my baby’s discomfort

each to their own

CheFaro · 15/05/2025 18:24

I’d have suggested he stuck to the medical side of things and got on with diagnosing the baby’s rash.

butterpuffed · 15/05/2025 18:20

Maybe the GP thinks the bright lights on a phone are bad for babies' eyes .

LoveBecomesaHabit · 15/05/2025 18:16

I think that’s one of those things where you either say something at the time or just let it go. I would find it irritating too. Unfortunately I’ve had much, much worse from GPs. Some of them seem to think the majority of their patients are the scum of the earth.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 15/05/2025 17:51

I agree with the doctor it’s nothing to do with age.

TinyTempest · 15/05/2025 17:49

he is there to look at a medical concern and not comment on anything else.

Oh is that right?

Can you link to this rule please?

RoseofRoses · 15/05/2025 17:48

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

ilovesooty · 15/05/2025 17:37

ItGhoul · 15/05/2025 17:20

Possibly a reformed attitude to interactions with parents and caregivers and an awareness of when to say something and when not.

I can 100% guarantee you that the only reaction it would get would be a shrug. At most, perhaps he'd say to the practice manager 'What an odd thing to complain about' and then forget about it.

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Or get you marked as a patient who makes vexatious complaints.