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AIBU?

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Original poster

Is this too much to eat in a day?

216 replies

SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:10

I’ve lost all perspective. So many hormone triggered gastro issues since having my kids and my daily diet has gone out of the window. I feel nauseas a lot but regardless of what I do/don’t eat. I wake up early (5am) and finish eating for the day at 4/5pm.

Today I’ve had:

Small porridge with banana and oat milk

slice of toast

a small plain chocolate cupcake (homemade) & a Kit Kat chunky

a salmon fishcakes with a couple of new potatoes and garden peas

a digestive biscuit AND about 3/4 of a bag of twirl bites!

I’m done for the day now but honestly feel awful (and a bit sick at how much sweet stuff I’ve had)

I will caveat this by saying I’m rather slim and definitely in the ‘a few extra pounds wouldn’t hurt’ category and I’m pretty physically active.

OP posts:
Original poster
SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:47

SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:44

So I only drink water and one instant no sugar coffee per day. Sometimes I justify chocolate to myself In my head because I see others drinking super calorific Starbucks/sweet drinks and I think ‘I don’t ever do that’. When my friend ordered a crazy frappe I’ll eat a brownie and drink my water. I drink a fair bit of water tbh.

I’ve been to GP and gastro and had investigations. I cut so much out of my diet the nhs Dieticians’s told me to stop and ‘just eat anything!’ Because my bmi hit 16 and they were going to hospitalise me. Eventually gastro said my stomach issues were hormone driven (potentially endo) but didn’t want to investigate it so just diagnosed IBS and told me to try to keep my bmi above 18.
I probably sound nuts but honestly this has just been since I had kids. 7 years ago I was normal

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But the long pregnancies of HG (awful awful condition) followed by baby stages of digestive issues, low body weight, food allergies (DS but I had to follow to breast feed). It’s just absolutely ruined my concept of ‘normal’. I don’t have a clue what’s a regular amount or variety to eat per day anymore.
I feed the kids super healthily and then binge sweets In my car.

OP posts:
SloppyThePoodle · 15/05/2025 16:46

Not enough food. If you are overeating chocolate and could do with gaining a few pounds, that sounds like you aren't eating enough. You need dinner! Try and stick to 3 meals a day with 2 small snacks if you're hungry (fruit, cheese, maybe a bowl of cereal?), and that may help you find a better balance. And you're not disgusting, you sound stressed out to me. Also to add, others are saying add protein but in my opinion you need to add more fibre 🙂

Original poster
SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:44

tearocket · 15/05/2025 16:30

You're not disgusting! It's bloody hard when you have kids etc, I'd give yourself a break. It takes a hell of a lot of discipline to stick to healthy foods at all times. Are you drinking much water? If you're feeling sick a lot and have gastro issues, maybe you should see the GP to discuss?

Show quote history

So I only drink water and one instant no sugar coffee per day. Sometimes I justify chocolate to myself In my head because I see others drinking super calorific Starbucks/sweet drinks and I think ‘I don’t ever do that’. When my friend ordered a crazy frappe I’ll eat a brownie and drink my water. I drink a fair bit of water tbh.

I’ve been to GP and gastro and had investigations. I cut so much out of my diet the nhs Dieticians’s told me to stop and ‘just eat anything!’ Because my bmi hit 16 and they were going to hospitalise me. Eventually gastro said my stomach issues were hormone driven (potentially endo) but didn’t want to investigate it so just diagnosed IBS and told me to try to keep my bmi above 18.
I probably sound nuts but honestly this has just been since I had kids. 7 years ago I was normal

OP posts:
Peclet · 15/05/2025 16:42

Go easy on yourself.

A kitkat chunky isn't going to make you sick!

You might feel better with some healthy swaps, and you have been given a tonne of good advice already. Enjoy the kitkat! Bounce on the trampoline!

tearocket · 15/05/2025 16:39

I will add that it might be an idea to have a supply of dark chocolate, dates, nuts, raisins in. Then you can reach for these if needing a sweet fix. And also to pay attention to protein sources which will keep you fuller for longer. Greek yogurt /eggs for breakfast, chicken or tuna salad lunch, etc. I have seen that you are Mum to a disabled child so please cut yourself some slack.

Soyfinger · 15/05/2025 16:39

SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:24

No we don’t. DH works very late and DS is very profoundly autistic and spends all evening naked on his trampoline in the garden. So no, no family dinner here.

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You have a profoundly autistic child and manage to be UPF free?

OP you have had a difficult day and indulged in some chocolate. You now feel a bit shit. It will pass and you’ll wake up tomorrow and will have a fresh day ahead of you

TheHouseofGirth · 15/05/2025 16:38

Why not keep some nuts and cheese slices ( not processed cheese) to snack on? Will fill you up.

IButtleSir · 15/05/2025 16:38

You definitely need more 'proper' food so that you are getting all the nutrients you should be. Prioritise increasing your fruit and vegetable intake- a banana and some peas is woefully inadequate for a while day.

Instead of having so many sugary snacks (one or two a day are fine if you're slim!), eat an early lunch and then dinner at about 4pm so you're done by the time your son gets home.

Nina1013 · 15/05/2025 16:38

Starlight1984 · 15/05/2025 16:33

You feel sick every single evening regardless of what you've eaten?

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I suspect this is stress and anxiety related as the time coincides when when her very high needs child arrives home from school.

HeddaGarbled · 15/05/2025 16:37

It’s all snacks and side-dishes, no mains. The small amount of salmon you get in the fish cakes and that’s it. Do you eat meat? Are you avoiding dairy?

If salmon is your only source of protein in the day, you need a piece of real salmon not fish cakes.

Senzaunadonna · 15/05/2025 16:36

OP I get from your posts that you are possibly stressed, overwhelmed, exhausted, etc?

Be kind to yourself. Your diet isn’t perfect but that’s fine. You’re doing great.

Do you get any time to yourself for self care?

Also, I wouldn’t declare yourself a UPF-free household (unless you need to be for DS’s needs). I think it’s just unhelpful language that can foster temptation and lead to binges.

3pointmountain · 15/05/2025 16:35

It's not too much food, but it's too much sugar and not enough actual nutrition.

Original poster
SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:34

doodleschnoodle · 15/05/2025 16:29

‘Enough’ is hard to quantify: enough calories? Probably. Enough nutrition? Probably not.

Personally I would add more protein. Choose between the porridge or toast, if you’re doing toast have some eggs or something.

Snacks, instead of the UPF biscuits and chocolates, find stuff that will keep you fuller and stop you reaching for chocolate and sugary processed stuff: Apple and peanut butter, some cheese and oatcakes, cooked chicken, some nuts, veg sticks and houmous or cream cheese etc. Dark chocolate is less bingeable than Kit Kats and Twirls.

Change mindset to nourishing your body.

Edited

That’s really helpful thank you

OP posts:
Starlight1984 · 15/05/2025 16:33

SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:13

@Soyfinger

i tend to feel awful and sick on an evening regardless of what I do/dont eat.

You feel sick every single evening regardless of what you've eaten?

Original poster
SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:32

Arrivederla · 15/05/2025 16:24

Exactly what I was going to say.

It doesn't sound like you are eating too much, but I would feel pretty sick with that much chocolate. Is that a fairly normal day's food for you?

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No, it’s one of my worse days usually I wouldn’t have the twirl bites. Without those it’s pretty representative.

OP posts:
Anotherparkingthread · 15/05/2025 16:32

That is so so sugary. Everything is a carb(sugar) and half of it contains actual sugar.

Id feel like dogshit if I ate that as well.

Starlight1984 · 15/05/2025 16:32

SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:16

We are actually a UPF free house which is the ironic thing. I made the cupcakes, bread and fishcakes myself … I bought the Kit Kat and twirl bites from the petrol station and ate them in the car… because I’m disgusting!

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😐

tearocket · 15/05/2025 16:30

SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:16

We are actually a UPF free house which is the ironic thing. I made the cupcakes, bread and fishcakes myself … I bought the Kit Kat and twirl bites from the petrol station and ate them in the car… because I’m disgusting!

Show quote history

You're not disgusting! It's bloody hard when you have kids etc, I'd give yourself a break. It takes a hell of a lot of discipline to stick to healthy foods at all times. Are you drinking much water? If you're feeling sick a lot and have gastro issues, maybe you should see the GP to discuss?

doodleschnoodle · 15/05/2025 16:29

‘Enough’ is hard to quantify: enough calories? Probably. Enough nutrition? Probably not.

Personally I would add more protein. Choose between the porridge or toast, if you’re doing toast have some eggs or something.

Snacks, instead of the UPF biscuits and chocolates, find stuff that will keep you fuller and stop you reaching for chocolate and sugary processed stuff: Apple and peanut butter, some cheese and oatcakes, cooked chicken, some nuts, veg sticks and houmous or cream cheese etc. Dark chocolate is less bingeable than Kit Kats and Twirls.

Change mindset to nourishing your body.

Original poster
SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:27

LittleMonks11 · 15/05/2025 16:24

Why do you finish eating for the day at 4/5pm? Are you on a restricted time diet? I would feel sick going to bed on a tummy full of chocolate.

Sweet treats are fine now and then but not as part of the daily routine. More proper food needed!

I don’t go to bed until about 9/10 but my DS comes home from his specialist school around 4:30 and I just don’t eat after that really. He’s very very high needs and I find it so stressful trying to eat on an evening I just don’t bother. It’s routine now. I’m used to it

OP posts:
Original poster
SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:25

its2025 · 15/05/2025 16:21

So It looks like you're having two daily meals and then a load of snacks in between? That's possibly not too many calories - but you might be nutrient deficient.
I'd try to get rid of the snacks and have a proper lighter meal instead perhaps as your last food of the say at 4/5?

That’s great advice thank you I’ll take that on board. I think I eat too much sugar and it makes me feel rubbish.

OP posts:
WhySoManySocks · 15/05/2025 16:25

Soyfinger · 15/05/2025 16:17

i can tell you Op with confidence that you are not a UPF “free” house

Edited
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I think the OP means there are no UPFs in the actual house because she eats them in secret in the car. We all know calories eaten in the car don’t count.

OP, the whole thing sounds disordered - not real dinner, a very healthy lunch and breakfast, lots of secret snacks eaten in hiding, a lot of shame associated with food.

LittleMonks11 · 15/05/2025 16:24

Why do you finish eating for the day at 4/5pm? Are you on a restricted time diet? I would feel sick going to bed on a tummy full of chocolate.

Sweet treats are fine now and then but not as part of the daily routine. More proper food needed!

Original poster
SENSummer · 15/05/2025 16:24

Soyfinger · 15/05/2025 16:18

So you never have a family dinner?

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No we don’t. DH works very late and DS is very profoundly autistic and spends all evening naked on his trampoline in the garden. So no, no family dinner here.

OP posts:
MargotB · 15/05/2025 16:24

A good percentage of your intake is sugar and carbs, so it's no wonder you feel awful and sick. It might help to remove the biscuits/cakes/toast/chocolate and replace with protein and veg/salad, and have a piece of fruit as a snack.