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Original poster

Colleague reported me for phone usage - awkward!!

158 replies

AmyRuby · 14/05/2025 17:34

I work in a fairly large office and there’s a very much ‘common sense’ approach to personal phone usage. No one sits at their desk and takes lengthy personal calls, but management accept there will be times people need to check/use their phones briefly and that for anything longer, they’ll step away from their desk or wait for breaks and lunch.

I had my 1:1 with my Manager today who told me that someone has reported to her that I’ve conversed with delivery drivers using my ring doorbell whilst at my desk - I simply say ‘please leave that round the side’ if no one’s in. I try to schedule deliveries for my WFH days but can’t always control that so it’s only a handful of
times this has happened.

My manager was clear she doesn’t have an issue with my phone usage and obviously she can’t tell me who reported it, although I have an idea.

This person will have known our manager will have had to say something to me - am I wrong to find them reporting this a bit pathetic? It just risks an awkward atmosphere when we are generally a fairly harmonious team.

OP posts:
Zezet · 14/05/2025 19:46

Zone2NorthLondon · 14/05/2025 17:58

The manager has to raise it if a complaint was made. Justifiable to do so

They really don't. They are a filter, not a voicemail recorder.

MaryBeardsShoes · 14/05/2025 19:40

You’re obviously doing this enough for people to notice. Stop answering your door at work and concentrate on what you’re supposed to be doing!

TeenLifeMum · 14/05/2025 19:38

As a manager I would let my team know if someone was reporting them to me just so they could be aware someone is behaving like that. But I would also say that I told the person it’s not something I’m concerned about as their work is excellent and not affected.

Cucy · 14/05/2025 19:36

TBF a handful of times is quite a lot.

I think it’s the fact you’re sat at your desk doing it and it no different taking a quick personal call.

Can you not just leave your desk and say it?

LadyLapsang · 14/05/2025 19:36

I have never heard a member of staff talk to a delivery driver. If we receive or make a personal call we would step into a meeting room. The only personal calls made at desks are usually brief calls at the end of the working day when people are confirming the time / place they will be meeting for drinks, meals or the theatre, but usually half the staff have left already as it will be early evening. Perhaps you take more calls than you realise.

MargotB · 14/05/2025 19:35

loobyloo1979 · 14/05/2025 17:43

I think your manager sees this as more of an issue than you do, or else they wouldn't have mentioned it and shut it down when the complaint was made.

I agree with this.

Some managers can't manage effectively, and hide behind others as their reason for raising things. In this instance OP, I'd hazard a guess that may be the case with your manager.

Peaceandquietandacuppa · 14/05/2025 19:34

RickiRaccoon · 14/05/2025 19:33

I usually get up from my desk to take a personal call so my colleagues wouldn't know what it's about. I have to take calls in case it's about my kids -- and my work could care less as long as I get my work done. Maybe just start walking away as you answer a call and no one will snoop/ overhear.

This, I think it’s more about interrupting people if they are concentrating - they don’t need to hear about my life admin, nor would I want them to know how many parcels I get 🤣🤣

ForRealThisTime · 14/05/2025 19:34

If your manager actually didn’t have a problem with it they wouldn’t have said anything. Your manager does have a problem with it and has issued a light warning hoping that you’ll take the hint and they can still be the good guy.

RickiRaccoon · 14/05/2025 19:33

I usually get up from my desk to take a personal call so my colleagues wouldn't know what it's about. I have to take calls in case it's about my kids -- and my work could care less as long as I get my work done. Maybe just start walking away as you answer a call and no one will snoop/ overhear.

MargaretThursday · 14/05/2025 19:31

I'd think that either:
The manager has an issue and is trying to gently warn you that they don't want to make it a bigger issue
or
The Op is on the phone for a lot longer than they think (and a lot of people do think they've only been on for such a short time, when in reality they've had far longer) and the conversation was along the lines of "I'm really struggling to concentrate because Amy had six conversations today along the lines of: Hi, is that my delivery? I was expecting it at 11:32 and it's 11:37 so that's really good timing, I'm so excited to get it finally.. just leave it down the side. No, there's no one in but if you go right to the end, then there's a green box, if you leave it behind there... yes that's right. The green box is our safe place. Can you just tell me if the cat is still there... it sometimes forgets how to use the cat flap..."

The responses on here of "snitching", "policing other behaviour", "petty" "pathetic" tells you exactly why if the phone calls are annoying people they've gone to the manager rather than having a quiet word.

Peaceandquietandacuppa · 14/05/2025 19:29

Hmm. I wouldn’t report it but I would find it annoying if someone was talking to delivery drivers at their desk.

I was in the office for the past 2 days and was not aware of anyone else taking personal calls or talking through their Ring doorbell. So even once would have stood out.

If I get a personal call, I step to a side room or hallway. Can you not do that when you get a ring notification? What do you do if you’re in a meeting and the delivery driver comes? I bet they still manage to leave the parcel don’t they, so why do you have to talk to them? Just a bit confused. And potentially seeing where it could annoy others.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 14/05/2025 19:27

MyDarlingWhatIfYouFly · 14/05/2025 18:53

My last few roles have been on the leadership team of small companies, there are always one or two of these who like to snitch on every little thing - it annoys me so much.

I’ve ended up telling people to focus on their own work and only come to me if there’s an issue that disrupts other people significantly or if they are aware of serious misconduct like fraud/theft. I don’t want to hear that employee x took 15 minutes extra for lunch or someone is looking at their phone. It’s often the snitchers who are more damaging to the company, rather than the people being snitched on 🤨

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In my experience it's the "snitchers" who do all the work while nothing is ever done about the ones taking the piss and eventually they get pissed off and say something. Usually because the "snitchee" is friendly with the boss, or does them a personal favour now and again or their kids are friends or whatever, they get away with murder.

I'm not saying all "snitchees" are swinging the lead. But far too many times they take the piss and nothing is done cos line managers don't want to be arsed dealing with it.

Loulo6098 · 14/05/2025 19:26

HenDoNot · 14/05/2025 19:23

Then you are a really poor manager.

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Sure. Enjoy.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 14/05/2025 19:24

Does the Ring ding dong noise disturb others if you have it on too loud? Are you shouting into the phone to the delivery driver so that everyone can hear? If not I'm not sure what the problem is.

HenDoNot · 14/05/2025 19:23

Loulo6098 · 14/05/2025 19:15

I usually tell my staff stuff like this not because I have an issue, but because they need to know someone is watching them and taking issue with them. I would never say who reported them, but you'd be surprised how quickly these things escalate if I don't promise to 'have a word'.

Show quote history

Then you are a really poor manager.

Loulo6098 · 14/05/2025 19:15

Stickortwigs · 14/05/2025 17:39

But why did the manager have to say something? If that was me about an employee I’d have internally rolled my eyes and not bothered raising it.

I usually tell my staff stuff like this not because I have an issue, but because they need to know someone is watching them and taking issue with them. I would never say who reported them, but you'd be surprised how quickly these things escalate if I don't promise to 'have a word'.

Kevinbaconsrealwife · 14/05/2025 19:14

The miserable fecker !!

SanctusInDistress · 14/05/2025 19:12

I manage people. Unless it is an issue, I wouldn’t have mentioned it.

It’s your manager.

godmum56 · 14/05/2025 19:03

Stickortwigs · 14/05/2025 17:39

But why did the manager have to say something? If that was me about an employee I’d have internally rolled my eyes and not bothered raising it.

my first thought as well.

GabriellaMontez · 14/05/2025 19:00

Why has your manager passed this on? If she's genuinely not bothered?

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 14/05/2025 18:59

There's no reason your manager would have "had" to say something. They chose to, and its worth questioning yourself on why that would be.

MyDarlingWhatIfYouFly · 14/05/2025 18:53

FenywHysbys · 14/05/2025 18:46

I’d be more concerned at the member of staff who had taken it upon themselves to police everyone else’s behaviour rather than getting on with their own work. I worked nearly twenty years with colleagues like this, it was exhausting

My last few roles have been on the leadership team of small companies, there are always one or two of these who like to snitch on every little thing - it annoys me so much.

I’ve ended up telling people to focus on their own work and only come to me if there’s an issue that disrupts other people significantly or if they are aware of serious misconduct like fraud/theft. I don’t want to hear that employee x took 15 minutes extra for lunch or someone is looking at their phone. It’s often the snitchers who are more damaging to the company, rather than the people being snitched on 🤨

Luckywithchildcare · 14/05/2025 18:48

there are two possibilities here as I see it,

  1. a colleague has reported you so either they have a problem with you generally or your phone usage is problematic or
  2. your manager made up an anonymous reporter such that they have a problem with you or your phone usage.
Either way, you can be sure that someone either dislikes the amount you use your phone or has a problem with you. In my view it would be wise, if you like the job and it is harmonious to lower my phone usage and closely monitor my relationships in case you are unaware of someone potentially looking to cause you difficulties. So in many ways I’d be pleased in the longer term to have this info in a way that hasn’t, currently, caused you difficulty at work.
FenywHysbys · 14/05/2025 18:46

I’d be more concerned at the member of staff who had taken it upon themselves to police everyone else’s behaviour rather than getting on with their own work. I worked nearly twenty years with colleagues like this, it was exhausting

IttttttssssME · 14/05/2025 18:42

Everything is pathetic when you get told you are taking the piss. The person who reported you obviously feels this is you.