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AIBU?

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To tell exH he can’t wfh in my house while daughter is at school

185 replies

ZebraPyjamas · 14/05/2025 08:30

I’ll try to keep this short - some background; exH and I are civil but he is not a good person, he lives with his parents and has never had the children overnight. I had to work to enforce firm boundaries after we split.

Recently our daughter was in hospital so he stayed in my house to look after the other children. I work part time so once she was home he came and wfh in my house the days I worked. Now she’s on phased return to school requiring a drop off in the morning, one visit for medical reasons 2 hours later and collecting 2.5 ish hours later.

He lives about 20 minutes from the school, my house is less than 10 minutes. He has spoken about his flexibility with work, when he signed on to work at 715 he’s been signed off by 3pm, with a lunch break of at least 30
minutes and coffee breaks etc in between. There will be no other children at home. He’s assuming he can use my house as a base during those in between hours so he would be there alone. This came up when I went through the schedule with him last night - he didn’t ask me if he could, but when I said you’ll have plenty of time to go home in between he said something along the lines of “hmmm your place is much closer, I’ll see”

I HATE him being in my space, I actually sage the place after he’s gone. Up to this he had never set foot in this house.

AIBU to say he can’t use my house?

OP posts:
ZebraPyjamas · 14/05/2025 08:36

Spirallingdownwards · 14/05/2025 08:32

How can "he see"? Does he have a key because if so take it back from him now.

No he doesn’t have a key but he knows where the spare key is. I thought about just moving that but he’ll be leaving the house with my daughter and son in the morning after I leave so could just take a front door key with him then (I’ve never let him do this but in theory he could do it)

OP posts:
Roodleyou · 14/05/2025 08:35

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Mulledjuice · 14/05/2025 08:35

Change the WiFi password

Roodleyou · 14/05/2025 08:35

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ZebraPyjamas · 14/05/2025 08:34

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Yes

OP posts:
FortyElephants · 14/05/2025 08:33

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She's called him XH and said he'd never been in her house before this so let's assume yes

hididdlyho · 14/05/2025 08:32

I think given you say there's been issues with boundaries in the past YANBU to stick to your guns.

Roodleyou · 14/05/2025 08:32

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Roodleyou · 14/05/2025 08:32

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Spirallingdownwards · 14/05/2025 08:32

How can "he see"? Does he have a key because if so take it back from him now.

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