Am I misreading tone?

I think we can see who has the issues here!

All this “cods wallop”?

I suggest you discuss your inability to be wrong in therapy.

I also go to work, as do a lot of people including your therapist.

Hooefully, this post has been a reminder that you needed, that you owe her money (she sounds like she deserves it!).

Again. You asked for feedback. About your situation.

It is not the fault of MN that you disagree with every response you've had and can't accept you're wrong.

If you didn't want honest answers, why ask the question?

I’ll forget can you just ask again later

Are you this arrogant in all your dealings with other people?
Why are you so much more important than others that it’s OK for you to know beforehand that you’ll forget to pay them, and just assume in a lordly way that they will run around to service your life and clear up any mess you leave?

I hope your therapy helps you get to the root of your sense of entitlement.

Her reply was very friendly. She was just pointing out that it's your responsibility to remember to pay your deposit and you didn't like being in the wrong. You still won't accept it. 🤷‍♀️

What's that, Skippy?

You're in therapy, you say?

Speaking of tone, this is a pretty disrespectful way to dismiss the dozens of people who've offered the feedback that you asked for.

12 pages of Absolute Codswallop 😆🤣😆🤣 or maybe 6 posts of codswallop 🤪

Do you think she's been held hostage and this is some sort of attempt to communicate with the outside world?

@ThePerkyCoralPoet Blink ONCE for YES and TWICE for NO.

Are you okay?
Do you need us to send help?

Weird, right??

Of all the things on this thread to reply to

Reminding a client who’s overdue is basically calling them out for being a dick. Not the same.

I call that auto-incorrect!

Cha cows don't actually exist (to the best of my knowledge), so I think it's an issue with that bottom row of letters being so close to the space bar and not looking at what ends up on the screen.

Anyway, I digress.

@ThePerkyCoralPoet I hope you are deep in contemplation. It's tough to learn that we're thoroughly in the wrong. It requires emotional intelligence. If you've managed to take it on board, give yourself a pat on the back.

If not, keep contemplating.

So she sends you a reminder in 3 days asking for payment....and your bank is still frozen, so you ask her to remind you again a few days after that....etc etc.

You'll know when your bank is unfrozen, she won't. How about when it's unfrozen you think to yourself "Now what payments did I miss making? 🤔" and catch up with them there and then? It's not her job to mother you.

I don't see anything wrong with her tone at all. But if I was her I would quite irritated by you asking her to remind you about payment. The responsibility is wholly on you to pay her and it would take seconds for you to put a reminder on your phone. Plus what you are asking makes no logical sense - you are the one with the banking issue so you are in a position to check when that is resolved. She could send you a reminder in say 3 days but then what? Would you expect her to keep sending you reminders until your issue is sorted out? That would be ridiculous!

So you can remind your clients but are apparently incapable of reminding yourself??

Also just to add on to my previous post – she is rightly sending you a message that she is not fussed if you don’t book the slot because you’re not a reliable / ideal client. Not in any moral way but just a practical sense. That’s what deposits are there for – to screen out who is actually a paying client and who is just a time-waster! (Time wasters also include people who require reminders, follow ups, etc to pay)

If you’d paid the deposit you’d have secured the slot and would then actually BE a client of hers, so she would probably follow up with you for remaining payments (the actual fee). Again as it stands, you are currently a non client with no current business relationship with her, so she’s rightly not willing to go the extra mile.

If she really needed every drop of business she would of course, but good for her that her business is doing okay enough that she can set her own reasonable terms.

I find your tone rather snarky and unpleasant.

Well.... I can see why you need a therapist. What you do or don't do in your business is up to you, but this therapist isn't your mum to chase after you. think of it as part of your therapy to set your reminders, which incidentally would have taken less time than to message her to ask her to remind you, then log in here and bother us with your nonesense.

Personally if my bank account has frozen I'd be making a note of all my due payments to make sure I didn't forget any when it was unfrozen.
Her tone was fine. I dont see how on earth she can set automated reminders for an issue that was yours. She probably doesn't have an automated system that scans her account for payments related to upcoming appointments. So YABVU.

It took me a little while too so I’ll join Team Old! 😂

Thanks! I am particularly old today! It happens sometimes!

The only 'tone' that is wrong here is yours. As a businesswoman, you set boundaries when you ask for payment for services rendered. She is doing the same. YOU owe HER money. Set a reminder and deal with it. If someone didn't pay you, you would be withing your rights to cancel your contract with them. With your attitude, should she do the same to you, you could hardly be surprised. Your debt is YOUR responsibility.

What are you like?? I can’t work you out, but thankfully, I don’t have to! Unhelpful? You? Yes!
Hasn’t anyone ever heard of a good old-fashioned desk diary? I am not tech-shy and I have all the usual stuff stored on my laptop and phone and work from those. However, I also have an A4 week-to-two pages diary open on my kitchen worktop and all my appointments are there. I just check it when I go to bed at night to see what my appts are for the next day. It’s never let me down yet!