To feel it’s a motherhood penalty… AIBU?

This isn’t a motherhood penalty and it’s why WFH gets a bad rap. You need to utilise before and after school, use a childminder, hire a nanny etc

I work from home and I feel that you should treat it as you do an office. That means not caring for children whilst you’re meant to be working. If your child is old enough to travel home on their own and be home for an hour without you, then by all means you can work when they’re home. However if you wouldn’t leave them home alone or they need picking us as they’re too young, then they’re too young for you to work whilst caring for them

I assume you knew the conditions when you accepted the job. If not why not?They are being perfectly reasonable not to expect you to have a break in the working day.
If you want the 95k you will have to get a child minder to pick up. Many working parents do this.

not shocked, u were obviously taking the p of yr other employer, just get childcare for yr child or work the shorter hours.

No husband. Just her
So, she should get adequate childcare and work ft

Can you do flexible hour? 7am to 330 pm? Can your DH do the school run or perhaps use the breakfast club ? It’s cheaper than the after school club as it’s only for an hour?

why should they pay you to look after your DD? Can you send DD to an after school club? Or a child minder?

At the end of the day, there are all sorts of reasons why the employer might want employees in the office at 3:30 (and it sounds like it’s not just 3:30 but possibly the OP is expecting to be unavailable until her child is in bed and would then log on again.)

Maybe the last few hours of the day are a core time when issues crop up and need an immediate response. Particularly when working across time zones, there can be key things which aren’t totally flexible. Maybe there are meetings taking place. Maybe it puts an additional burden on colleagues if someone is out of action for a few hours at a key time.

believe it or not, most employers and managers want the job done as effectively as possible. As a manager, I’m quite happy with members of my team wfh at agreed times, when it works for the company and when they are equally productive as they are in the office. If it’s not viable for them to wfh on a particular day or at a particular time then they need to be in the office.

i really don’t see the OPs problem here. Take a 75k salary if you want to leave at 3:30 every day and do the school run. Or take 95k and use some of that extra dosh to pay for after school care

I hear you

So taking the 75k is a higher rate of pay than you are on now but would require less hours than you currently do so more down time - sounds like a bloody win in itself!

Or you can take the much higher paid role and work much longer hours and pay for childcare such as after school club or childminder, which most other people have to manage on wages much lower than 75k and probably still be 18k up.

I’m not sure what you have to moan about they are two great offers and you’re lucky they offered you alternative hours to the job stated rather than just turning you down for the role.

Big salary, big bonus high achievers wouldn’t get out of bed for £92k.

Funny on mn,men earn these £92k+ salaries they need a housewife as he’s just so busy at work. Too important,too busy to attend school event or do afternoon pickup. He’s so very busy,so very in work all the time.Yet here we are assured that big salary ,big bonus ,high achievers leave at 1500 daily and attend all school events. Aye?

A woman gets a £92k salary and it’s all oh no! What’s to be done
Do what everyone else does, throw money at the issue. That’ll sort it

Where did I say I earn anything like that amount of money? I don’t. I earn less than half that.

Is that what you tell yourself! That most of the country on a lot less than you are on is because they are not considered trustworthy! How insulting! Ever heard of quango jobs? High paid roles that are nothing to do with being trusted! Just ridiculous jobs that aren't needed and are absolutely not based on trust. Hospital trusts are known for blowing a fortune on high paid quango jobs that don't serve a lot of purpose!

We don’t know when the OP is starting, how long she’s out for pick up (someone upthread mentioned they were out and back in less than half an hour) or when she finishes in the evening. Though she did say that the job she’s applying for had the expectation of some evening work, which everyone seems to have ignored. We don’t know what sector she’s in. We don’t know how her job is measured.

The fact that this prospective job is are happy for her to stop at 3.30, indeed would rather she stopped at 3.30
and paid her less than paying her more to continue once she’s back, suggests it’s not stopping at 3.30 that’s at issue.

The benefit to the business of giving me the flexibility to, for instance, walk the dogs, do things with the kids etc during the working day is that I don’t mind doing calls at 6am with the folks in Australia, or working until after midnight with the team in California. My flexibility actually is better for the business than someone who worked inflexibly from 9am until 5.30pm every day, but had that green light on for the full 7.5 hours (not forgetting the hour for lunch!). Working flexibly doesn’t mean bunking off.

Yeah exactly

There's flexibility - which I totally agree is the norm for senior roles

And then there's only being available for meetings 9:30-3 (because I am guessing the OP isn't shelling out for breakfast club either)

And I am also guessing that the OP would also expect the more "standard" flexibility around school events, dentist etc

If in working day one is routinely finishing early eg 1500 and/or going to school events lasting hours I’d suggest you’re not pivotal or missed

Ok. But every single day? There isn’t anything that might require this person from 3-5pm any day ever? I can also go to sports days and dentist appointments and whatever (though nowhere near this salary I’m a manager at my place of work and have been there 20 years soon) but not every single day. That’s a flexible work request surely.

Actually, it does. You get paid that salary because the trust and responsibility in you is high. Not every job is measured by hours sat at a desk, thank god. In my industry the highest paid may well frequently work over the weekend and have evening requirements as well - so if they want to knock off for sports day or pick up, damn right they can. They’ve earned that level of trust.

I think if you’re routinely absent in core hours when meant to be working you’re not pivotal or that necessary, that you just nip off 2 hr early daily or to attend events . Interesting ,because if , it’s not formally agreed and written into contract it’s technically an unauthorised absence. It’s also not a good look if senior staff get perks and flexibility that aren’t available to all. Out of interest, do other staff get to leave at 1500 to collect child and retain FT pay

The op employer has declined her request, evidently it doesn’t work for the organisation

I’m merely offering a counterpoint to all those posters saying that flexible jobs don’t exist/ people who work flexibly aren’t valued. I’ve worked this way for 15+ years and wouldn’t take a job that didn’t offer flexibility.

It's something to get thought about if redundancies become afoot, the people that cost a lot of money to be off doing things with the kids regularly might be the first target.

Getting paid a huge salary isn't to let you take more time away from the desk than any other member of staff and work only when you feel like it! Most companies wouldn't tolerate that level of coming and going! I was getting myself to and from school by the time I was about 11 and you've got parents leaving work mid afternoon to pick up an adult child! It's a recipe to create workplace tension when people on far less money watch those on higher salaries coming and going at their leisure.

so,with all your experience and wisdom you’re advising a woman to take a pay cut and potentially put her career on a slower trajectory because you and your colleagues are all coaching,collecting,attending school events on a full wage. You’ve missed the key point,this isn’t about you. @Yudl is not getting offered FT salary to knock off from work to do a school run. Her work has said no, and adjusted her pay accordingly. Your example really has no relevance because you’re paid FT wage, and her employer will not accommodate that.

I mean how an organisation structures itself is going to vary. Some areas have more need for set structure, some can be flexible around performance and some require on site at precise hours. There’s no ‘once you hit 92K a year you have no one paying attention to your hours’ rule.

where I work there are core hours and everyone should be available for meetings and calls within those times. Or you put in a flexible working request and make a different plan. It’s not a place that’s based on specific targets, senior managers are there often to escalate issues to so need to be available for their staff 9-5