Evil MIL

This is like saying that ALL women get nasty when they age. Utter rubbish, unless you Op are also going to be an evil MIL?

Describing the mother of the man you chose to make a life with as evil, is a bit ott, dramatic, school yard etc

I had one of these MILs and I so desperately wanted to have a good relationship with her as my mum is gone ( when I was 10). She just used my vulnerability against me.

Examples include : asking for photos on our wedding day of just my DH and her family in case we split up; suggesting ( after 4 kids inc a set of twins ) that I get sterilised - my husband shouldn’t have a vasectomy in case he wants more children with someone else down the line; when we’d been married 25 still trying to fix him up with old high school girlfriends as he could ‘do better’; calling me DH ‘wife I SUPPOSE ‘ at our 20 th wedding anniversary to her friend ( who was horrified) ; lying to the DVLA so she could keep driving despite knowing she had blackout risks, telling everyone I was 50 when she knew full well I was 49 so I was inundated with 50 cards and she thought that was funny and on and on.

she’s dead now and none of us miss her at all. And it could and should have been so different.

solidarity OP x

I had one my daughters grandmother, she was absolutely horrid. She had a lovely sweet mask but underneath she was a very nasty woman. Glad I do not deal with her anymore.

I can remember the first time I met my exes mum, i asked him first (I was 15) what her favourite flowers were and took her them. She looked at me and said, “DH buys me these, not you”. And put them in the bin.
He is in his mid 40s now and I was his last “serious” relationship. I often wonder if that behaviour from his mother has put off all the potential relationships he could have had. She asked me was I pregnant when we met the second time we met, again, I am still 15, I said no because I wasn’t and she then calls over her son and says “stop taking HER the chippy”.

Set a tone for the future ones and now Im happily NC with Mr Lwreninem’s mother as are all the DiLs. We’ve all tried with her, individually and as a family and she just keeps threatening us all with anything she can and sporadically makes false allegations to different services.
It goes in cycles, so it’s SiL B’s turn next and she’s genuinely frightened. She’s gone Social Services prior with this SiL and it almost ended her marriage to BiL but it makes it easier there is 3 of us, we support one another through the whole crazy, none of her DS see her either.

My DM can be difficult, and my SIL (brothers wife) often used to make out to me that she was being completely outrageous but it was always exaggerated. My SIL can also be a completely self involved PITA. So I always take these threads with a huge pinch of salt!

Two sides to everything. From this less than tiny snippet, you sound rather hot headed and the fact that you say you've done everything to improve the situation and it's your mother in law that doesn't take any responsibility for wrong doings, is a touch ironic.

These MIL bashing threads are tedious.

There are some horrible people in the world, has nothing to do with them being a MIL or not. They’re just horrible people.

And in many instances there absolutely are two sides to the story.

And I assume that none of the MIL bashers have sons, because in 20 years time you can be expecting to be lumped in with the “all MILs are horrible” train of thought.

And do bear in mind that men have MILs as well.

You think MILs are awful people? Be careful what you wish for.

Sometimes there aren't 2 sides to a story, some people are just plain nasty for no reason other than you married their child. My MIL was awful and to this day I'm not sure why.

Nope, got a wonderful MiL.

My actual mother made Cruella de Vil seem like Mary Poppins though, so I guess it swings in roundabouts.

if you mean that the MIL from hell see themselves as victims for not being the centre of the world? You are probably not wrong.

The problem with IL is that you are stuck with them. Anyone else being a quarter as horrible as some of these stories, you just cut contact immediately and forget about them. But with an over-bearing unreasonable MIL from hell, it's not that easy.

She didn’t say that at all.

My lovely mil died. She was wonderful. I miss her all the time.

Only on page 1 so far, but do you think it's all about control? They ( ILs) can not control the narrative when their son or daughter moves on, but that doesn't stop them trying. Sad.

Ffs. Sometimes there really aren’t

That’s such a shame, I had the most wonderful late MIL, she was ace, miss her everyday.

My ex MIL was horrendous. She would smoke 60 a day so we'd leave smelling like ashtrays. Then in front of her own son she'd tell us in graphic detail what she'd been doing with disgusting men she met on dating apps.
One time she showed me her boobs and said these aren't too bad are they.
Revolting woman.