Dad using individual ladies loo to change baby – what’s the etiquette?

I’m sure that Jersey airport only had baby shaming in the ladies toilets when we were there a few years ago. DH was completely baffled

If another woman is using the single cubicle then the waiting woman who needs the sanitary bin won't be able to use it until the cubicle is free anyway.

It's a single cubicle. No one else would be in there

If a man is in the women’s then a woman who needs that bin can’t access it because it a man is where he shouldn’t be.

Because of course a baby changing station in the gents will be set up in 5 mins

But what if someone else comes in while the daughter is on the loo (or even if it is a constant stream of men)?

We were in a restaurant with this exact set up yesterday, it’s a small place and there’s just two entirely self-contained single occupancy units, one tiny one marked gents and one spacious one marked ladies / disabled / changing and fitted out as such. DH changed DS so obviously he used the one with the changing table. It’s a self-contained room onto a general access corridor, by no stretch of the imagination is it ‘going into the Ladies’ toilets’ as some on this thread are suggesting.

Yes.

I don't get what the issue is with sanitary bins. Yes, men wont need them, but they wont spontaneously combust if they see one either. I mean, disabled loos are for men and women, and have them in too.

They’re not giving up their space to a man. They’re waiting a couple of minutes for a parent to change a child, just as they’d have to if a mother was doing the changing. It really shouldn’t cause so much angst imo.

As it's a self-contained cubicle with no communal space, there is no compromise of female safety or privacy to other users.

Ideally there should be a changing facility clearly avaliable to men, but I wonder if the ladies' toilet has more space to accommodate the table and bins and it might not be practical to put provision in both toilets.

A man knocked on ladies' toilet door in a pub and asked if there was a baby changing facility. I said yes and he asked if I could wheel it out to him. He took it into the men's toilets. That was how it should be imo. Although depends in whether the nappy station is fixed or not, of course.

Interesting that you don’t see a changing space within the men’s as an option - just women giving up their spaces.

Is your DH going to raise the lack of changing tables in the men’s with the cafe?

So what exactly would be uncomfortable about that? Man comes out of toilet with baby - ooh terrifying! Save me!!!

Nonsense.

In my workplace there are three self contained loos - one marked accessible, one marked men’s and one marked women’s. I would never use the men’s and I don’t expect the men to use the women’s (which contains the sanitary bin). That they are self contained is irrelevant.

Women are, of course, well-used to there not being enough facilities for them - just look at any theatre or railway station - huge queues for the women, men just waltzing through.

So I don’t see why they should have to give up their space to a man just because it’s self contained.

He can do what women did for years, and campaign for more changing tables in male spaces. This is my real
o section - that men simply won’t do the work needed but will hijack women’s work instead. And then it gets called equality.

Some women might because they aren't thinking of it as a baby change, they're thinking of it as the women's loo.

Not at all appropriate...
He can glance in himself and check if anyone is exposed and wait 10 seconds if need be.
How awkward to put your DH in that position he'll look like a creep that's using the DC as an excuse to go in.

Ah! I thought she meant individual closed cubicles in a shared bathroom. I mean, it wouldn't be great for a man to use a female cubicle, but with a baby I wouldn't be bothered I think.

There isn’t a forcefield on the door. The SC decision doesn’t protect anyone from an assailant.
Also the toilet in the OP isn’t a shared space anyway.

It’s self contained. He wouldn’t be in there with anyone. Yes, there should be changing facilities in both and you should complain but it’s no big deal.

For single occupancy ones I think it's fine for hin to use it to change the baby, but I too would be complaining (probably to myself because im pretty shy) about sexist facilities because men should be able to change the baby without going in the ladies toilets!

In that situation it would be fine. If it was in the main area of the communal women's toilets and he's alone with her in another situation then he could always lay the pushchair flat to change her in there instead. Usually if it's communal toilets then the changing table is in the disabled cubicle though.

Sweet fucking Jesus. It doesn’t matter. Would you refuse to go into an individually locked unisex toilet if it said, ‘Penguins only’ on it? It’s just a word. You’re being absolutely ridiculous. It will be THE SAME PLACE if the cafe owner labels it penguins, men, women, aliens or fucking idiots. It doesn’t matter.