Why do men future fake?

Men and women are different (shocker!). Unlike women, where the long game of kids and stability is ever present (even if we don’t admit it) most men’s attitude to relationships is in the moment - I’m attracted to her and let’s see where it goes - no more than that. But then women will at some point be keen to secure the long term commitment and inevitably men will say yes of course they want the same thing in order to stop the “nagging” when in reality they aren’t sure either way.

I looked for a man who can cook amazingly and I got one!

Do you look for a man who can cook then?

Or do you just live on takeaways?

she could have cut ties sooner though and not sat around waiting, why is it always on the men? why cant women think more and if it is not working act and stop being so passive and leaving decisons up to others

For convenience, including, but not limited to, sex.

How is this a mystery to you?

This happened to my friend who was messed about by two different men one after the other. It was always "complicated". One was a freelance musician who blamed finances and lack of stability but didn't want her enough to change direction and one was entangled with his ex and kids and blamed the ex constantly for not being able to move in with her or she'd deny him access. Both together they wasted her 30s and 40s. In the second guy actually went back to his wife. She was so broken. Too late for children by then..ultimately she died of cancer a few years later. We all tried to help her get free but she just wanted to believe all the "soons" and "I just need to ...".
It's fine to change your mind, get married, then fall out of love, but don't promise x in the distant future when you have no.intention of following through

A university friend wouldn’t live with a man less she was engaged with church booked. How we laughed! She said her parents were old fashioned and she didnt want to upset them. Think she was pretty smart actually. If more of us did this it would deal with the issue. Some of the old ways protected women.

Not everyone has

marriage? yes/no
kids? yes/no

Life is not a tick box excercise

Do women really cook and clean for their new boyfriends? They're the mugs then. I don't cook and am not especially domesticated; I like sex so a boyfriend who also wants sex sounds ideal to me.

I don't think "future-faking" is a thing. Not in a malicious, devious way, anyway. Most people don't know how they'll feel about anything in 2 or 3 or 4 years' time, not with certainty. I never have, myself (and I've surprised myself in some of the ways I've changed my mind, and also not changed my mind).

But if you say you don't know what the future holds you get accused of being a commitment-phobe (which I was throughout my 20s). Commitment is a huge, scary thing - even committing to DP in my own head was terrifying and I was 35 when I did that. And even now, even after 12 years and even when both of us are now assuming we're in it for life - even now I know either of us might change our mind in 10 years' time because it's inherent to humans. And that wouldn't be future-faking. It's just that you can never, ever guarantee your future mindset.

Isn’t it obvious. It’s to trick you into thinking they are more committed than they really are. Future faking allows them to fast track a relationship/ situation so they get what they want sooner. The question you should be asking is why does it take some women years and years before they realise that’s what it is. If you want marriage and or children then you have to make it your priority.

Maybe because marriage is a serious business and you have to be 100% certain you are doing the right thing for the right reasons.

I can't speak for men but what I say at one stage is not what I will necessarily be the same in the future, I would not call it ;future fake; just things change or my feelings may change so I dont see why men would be any different nor need a label attached to it

same and being serious or not, having children or not, spending big or small on things, holidays, buying houses or cars people change

It'll be this. They're too comfortable.

The simple answer is they are waiting for something better.

Men and women do this all the time.

The grass is greener where you water it.

For sex, a cleaner, a cook. They don’t want to lose you, but they’re also selfish immature pricks who also don’t want to grow up and get married and have children.

What's especially annoying is that they probably will end up doing so, but later in life, whereas for the lady they’ve strung along for years, it’ll be too late for her to then have children.

Sex & having someone useful to cook his food and clean his loo.

Why give up that convenient person before someone he prefers comes along.

I think at the end of the day it's the biological clock. Women have a time limit to settle down with the right person (assuming they want kids), whereas men can stay with the person who's right for the moment and not worry about the future.

A lot of men think promise whatever they have to to get a woman into bed now. Cynical maybe but true nonetheless. Sorry about your goddaughter

Happened to me, 8 years.

They don't want you to go, they want you to keep being the girlfriend, but also don't want to get married/commit. They know you'll leave if you do, so they lie. Pretty straight forward, no big mystery.

For sex.