Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Do phalloplasties actually work?

562 replies

SilverTapz · 11/05/2025 22:38

After wondering about this for a while, I ended up searching phalloplasty online and ended up on a Reddit page where people post their progress. I had never seen one before an was curious, I guess. It was actually quite shocking. People with what looks like no muscle left on their forearms, someone with a necrotic 'scrotum', someone where the stitches were wide open and the tip has turned black and left a gaping hole etc etc. People seem to be commenting saying that they look great, they've made the right decision etc, but honestly they look absolutely butchered. It's scary. And I guess my question is, do they actually function? Some of these people are so young and it's scary what they've done to their bodies. I can't help but think a lot of them will regret the decision. Is it mainly cosmetic? Can they orgasm? Honestly just very shocked by what I've seen!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
14
Bazinga007 · 12/05/2025 02:15

Some of those reddit frankindick images are grim.

Chickensky · 12/05/2025 02:06

ThatOpenSwan · 11/05/2025 22:52

Mumsnet is such a sensible place to ask this question, well known as it is as a bastion of level-headed, well-informed trans healthcare advice. I'm sure you'll get some illuminating answers coming from a place of genuine knowledge, OP, which I'm also sure is what you're looking for with this wonderfully good faith question.

(Yes of course they work, trans men aren't mindless idiots and are capable of weighing up risks and benefits.)

Updated.

TheOriginalEmu · 12/05/2025 01:55

SilverTapz · 11/05/2025 23:10

I've found women on Mumsnet to be incredibly well read and informed about this type of thing. It clearly differs from your opinion, however my question arose from what I have seen, and it isn't pretty. It's scary. I would be incredibly concerned if my daughter was considering it.

Well they might be informed on some issues, but not this one.
Sometimes with the aid of pumps etc you can get an erection after phaloplasty. Does it work the same as a cis man’s penis, no. But they CAN be functional.
Would you be this concerned if your son had need of reconstructive surgery after cancer or an accident?

It’s interesting because as a person who lost a leg at the hip as well as pelvic muscle. my body looks very different to the norm. If I was to have reconstructive surgery I still wouldn’t look ‘normal’ but for me it would be fantastic. Who is anyone else to judge what I want my body to look like? Same goes for trans men.

JIMER202 · 12/05/2025 01:46

I feel terribly sad for anyone who is so unhappy they go through such serious and painful surgery. The complications sound horrific.
Having had so many painful essential surgeries myself, I would be devastated and so worried if my children felt the need to go this extreme. I’d be happy with them having any age appropriate partner, dressing however they want, going against gender norms etc but I would be gutted if they did irreversible surgery. It’s why I emphasize to my sons they can be whoever they want to be, dress or like whatever, but they will always be male.

Gettingbysomehow · 12/05/2025 01:11

moogdroog · 11/05/2025 22:45

No, they never work. The goal seems to be standing to pee, which very few of them actually achieve.
Without complications, it's a multi- surgery process (maybe 5?), but of course, it's riddled with complications and many of these women get stuck in a surgery doom-loop.
There have been deaths associated with phallo, and many are left incontinent or with fistula, not to mention the necessary sacrifice of arm, leg, back and cheek tissue.
It is monumental self harm.

This is why it pisses me off when children are told "you can be whatever gender you want". No you can't and they are never told about the awful risks.

Hwi · 12/05/2025 01:10

I can't believe allegedly grown-up allegedly sentient people can debate for real if 'people can create a functioning organ just like that'. FFS.

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 12/05/2025 00:50

Kate8889 · 12/05/2025 00:47

Sorry, just catching up and haven't read all the replies, are these people who needed something removed because of penile cancer? I would hope just like for women with breast cancer, they can make their own choices but be empowered with honest information about potential results

Edited

No, they're female people who have undergone surgery on their bodies with the hope the procedures would create functioning facsimiles of male genitalia.

Kate8889 · 12/05/2025 00:47

Sorry, just catching up and haven't read all the replies, are these people who needed something removed because of penile cancer? I would hope just like for women with breast cancer, they can make their own choices but be empowered with honest information about potential results

SALaw · 12/05/2025 00:47

@493ruth“Do you often worry about whether strangers can orgasm?” Isn’t concern for the wellbeing of strangers part of being empathetic and also necessary for a functioning society? Isn’t that the entire basis of the charity sector?

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 12/05/2025 00:46

Oh, and one reason I object to young women being influenced into thinking they need cosmetic labiaplasties is the potential of irreversible damage to the clitoral nerves.

See: www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/clitoris-sexual-health-surgery-jessica-pin-b1938751.html

SALaw · 12/05/2025 00:44

glittercunt · 11/05/2025 23:24

Most work. Might not be organically done, but most work.

Some experience recovery issues.

You're more likely to hear about the ones which didn't have the desired result, as people in those groups are more likely to talk about something they need support or reassurance over, than things which have gone right.

They don't remove muscle feom arms. Just skin. It's effectively a skin graft.

The important thing here is, it's a person's choice what they do or don't do with their body. You might not like it but it's not your body.

It’s not just a skin graft. They remove fat, blood vessels, nerves etc. if it was a skin graft it wouldn’t have to come from such a visible part of the body as the forearm and wouldn’t result in the massive indentation in the entire forearm that is very noticeable.

HelenaWaiting · 12/05/2025 00:41

glittercunt · 11/05/2025 23:24

Most work. Might not be organically done, but most work.

Some experience recovery issues.

You're more likely to hear about the ones which didn't have the desired result, as people in those groups are more likely to talk about something they need support or reassurance over, than things which have gone right.

They don't remove muscle feom arms. Just skin. It's effectively a skin graft.

The important thing here is, it's a person's choice what they do or don't do with their body. You might not like it but it's not your body.

Surely if the NHS is spending hundreds of thousands of pounds on surgeries that have neither a medical nor an ethical basis it is every taxpayer's business? There has never been a meaningful debate about whether taxpayers should be asked to fund what are at best cosmetic procedures and at worst grotesque mutilation. Successful outcomes and medical necessity are important factors when decisions are made about whether or not to fund other complex surgical procedures.

SALaw · 12/05/2025 00:39

With both phalloplasty and vaginoplasty threads on Reddit I have seen repeated mention of multiple corrective surgeries being needed. Why is the “failure” rate so high and why are people putting up with it? It seems to be relatively accepted that this would happen and people are left needing years and years of corrective procedures. It’s very upsetting to read.

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 12/05/2025 00:25

493ruth · 12/05/2025 00:18

Do you often worry about whether strangers can orgasm?

Yes. I'm passionately against FGM- Female Genital Mutilation- which is a vile mutilation done of female children and adolescents to limit their capacity for sexual pleasure in adulthood. I also donate to charities which help women physically recover from life-altering birth injuries.

Next question?

493ruth · 12/05/2025 00:18

SilverTapz · 11/05/2025 22:38

After wondering about this for a while, I ended up searching phalloplasty online and ended up on a Reddit page where people post their progress. I had never seen one before an was curious, I guess. It was actually quite shocking. People with what looks like no muscle left on their forearms, someone with a necrotic 'scrotum', someone where the stitches were wide open and the tip has turned black and left a gaping hole etc etc. People seem to be commenting saying that they look great, they've made the right decision etc, but honestly they look absolutely butchered. It's scary. And I guess my question is, do they actually function? Some of these people are so young and it's scary what they've done to their bodies. I can't help but think a lot of them will regret the decision. Is it mainly cosmetic? Can they orgasm? Honestly just very shocked by what I've seen!

Do you often worry about whether strangers can orgasm?

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 12/05/2025 00:15

ThatOpenSwan · 11/05/2025 22:52

Mumsnet is such a sensible place to ask this question, well known as it is as a bastion of level-headed, well-informed trans healthcare advice. I'm sure you'll get some illuminating answers coming from a place of genuine knowledge, OP, which I'm also sure is what you're looking for with this wonderfully good faith question.

(Yes of course they work, trans men aren't mindless idiots and are capable of weighing up risks and benefits.)

In that case, read this essay on the subject from someone who is very happy with the results of a phalloplasty procedure.

https://nymag.com/intelligencer/article/gabriel-mac-essay.html

My Penis, a Love Story

I didn’t need a penis to be a man. But I needed one to be me.

https://nymag.com/intelligencer/article/gabriel-mac-essay.html

Apao · 12/05/2025 00:06

I can’t imagine they feel much, I had a skin graft on my face and I have numbness and weird nerve type feelings, not something I’d want on my genitals.

BrianaBlessed · 11/05/2025 23:59

That Reddit thread is actually one of the most shocking things I’ve ever seen. These women are butchering themselves and the results are repulsive. They look nothing like a penis. And there’s so many surgeries gone wrong. Honestly, I didn’t know this extreme existed and it’s appalling. It’s taking advantage of mental health issues with extreme outcomes

Outofthebluemonday · 11/05/2025 23:51

Some years ago, my Uni professor covered “sex change” very thoroughly in lectures. He had some videos of interviews with sex change patients. First hand discussions of expectations and actual outcomes. The focus was on the surgeries of genitals … not so much on hormones, facial changes, voice.

Very much doubt this could be discussed in this manner today.

Im certain there have been many miraculous improvements in surgery since my Uni, but the images of female to male surgery with details was not comfortable viewing. Many surgeries required. The penis could only become erect with a pump or other mechanics (obviously). Incontinence and leakage/dribbling can be an issue. Was left with the impression it was a symbolic penis & not a magic-wand “real” one. The clitoris is moved to penis and hopefully still works.
The male to female … they get a vagina, but it needs maintenance and lube.

It’s not like having a my vag, nothing like my dude’s penis. It’s a whole different lived experience.

Heavily discussed was expectations and outcomes. Living with new medical issues, infections, urinary incontenance & upkeep of new parts. It was noted that rates of depression and suicide were quite high post surgery.

The panel was “Average” people, and a clinical discussion - not the influencer types you would see today.

Mrsbloggz · 11/05/2025 23:48

FionnulaTheCooler · 11/05/2025 23:27

I believe there is an alternative surgery called metoidoplasty that uses existing clitoral tissue to create a sort of micropenis which is capable of becoming erect and would actually have some sexual sensation, unlike the flesh tubes created with phalloplasty.

Androgens alone are generally enough to create a sort of micro penis ime

Lardychops · 11/05/2025 23:45

Lovelysummerdays · 11/05/2025 23:32

I have heard trans men used as a gotcha, would you want a trans man with a erection in the next hospital bed type stuff. I ‘d think with the complication rate being so high they are probably in due to neo penis being infected or failing in some way.

It’s pretty rare that it goes ok and not everyone goes with the inflatable option as thst can cause complications too.

It sort reminds me of playing blackjack and going for a five card trick. Odds aren’t great and have to decide whether to stick or twist.

I certainly wouldn’t feel threatened by a trans identifying man in a hospital bed next to me as they are 100 percent female in my view and therefore welcome in my spaces- skin graft penis or no skin graft penis.

Lardychops · 11/05/2025 23:40

NaiceBalonz · 11/05/2025 23:29

Erectile devices were created for men who lost the ability to gain an erection due to age, or medication. So the vast majority of people with erectile devices are 'cis' men.

But they are males ( no need for the word cis thanks- I know what men are - all women and men for that matter do) that have erectile dysfunction

Not females who have undergone (arguably dangerous surgeries) to make them look male and are attempting to inflate a flaccid skin graft?

I mean there is a difference no?

JHound · 11/05/2025 23:38

ThatOpenSwan · 11/05/2025 22:52

Mumsnet is such a sensible place to ask this question, well known as it is as a bastion of level-headed, well-informed trans healthcare advice. I'm sure you'll get some illuminating answers coming from a place of genuine knowledge, OP, which I'm also sure is what you're looking for with this wonderfully good faith question.

(Yes of course they work, trans men aren't mindless idiots and are capable of weighing up risks and benefits.)

😀

glittercunt · 11/05/2025 23:38

SilverTapz · 11/05/2025 23:27

I don't know. People detransitioning who had surgery in their 20s have different opinions, especially if they had major surgery to alter their bodies. I don't think it's as simple Z 'your body your choice'. There's something seriously wrong here.

The only complaint I've heard from someone I know who had phallo, was that they were not prewarned of every single negative aspect which could occur.

It's something which needs to be super transparent.

The procedure is likely to improve greatly over time as medical knowledge and tools etc improve. But it currently works for most.

There are other choices besides phallo. I wouldn't choose it. But then I also wouldn't have chosen the current shitshow that is premenopausal whatthefuck that I currently have.

I'm super pissed off that I was never warned what happens to labia during peri. Oh and we weren't told peri existed either.