Hello everyone.
Please hold my hand.
I'm 33.5. No kids. No partner.
Someone I was with for 7 months was a pathological liar and it all blew up this weekend. I ignored red flags and when I confronted him, he turned cold and left me. I literally told him I'd forgive him, but the lies need to stop. He ended it and refused to even alknowledge the reason we weren't together anymore. Just called himself a bad guy and said I deserved better.
I know it's only 7 months but when you feel time is running out to have a baby and you found your person (at the start)... this burns.
I tried to pace myself with him but he truly love bombed me.
I've spent the past few days an anxious, depressed, manic mess. Missing the good morning texts. Missing the cuddles. Missing the attention.
I believed for the past few days I'd missed out on someonething that I have every proof would have driven me insane....BUT he was already slowly driving me insane....The anxiety just became a part of me and my day...and although I know I'll be shaken up for a while...I've just had a lightbulb moment. I will be ok...surely?
I really want to be a mum and find someone. More than anything.
Happy ending stories after something like this are much needed and welcome. I haven't gone into detail about the lengths of his deciet but he made up people, friends, jobs, events, conversations, scenarios, where he was all the time, his living situation....all of it. Gaslit me in every aspect of the word.
I really am quite low but that glimmer of hope I feel deep inside is something I need some encouragement with.
AIBU to deep down believe that I'm still young, I will be a mum and find someone, and I will smile again? Or do I need to accept that it may just not happen?