To veto a double-barrelled first name

I agree @londongirl5 double barrelled first names sound really tacky imo. If I meet a child with one, it does give me an immediate preconception about them. Plus, I do think the name is something both parents have to agree on. Irrespective of who is carrying the baby, no-one should get to unilaterally decide a name that the other isn't happy with.

I think it depends on the name and if it properly hyphenated. I'm in my 50s and went to school with 3 girls called Sarah-Jane, an Anne-Marie, and a Polly-Anna. All went on to good universities and are very successful in their chosen careers. The current hyphenated (and not hyphenated) names tend to be copies of 'celebrity' names and are so much more prevalent than the more traditional names which I think is why some people see them as common. When my own DC were in school Neighbours and Home and Away were huge on TV and the number of children called Shannon, Charlene, Libby and Paige was hilarious- 4 or 5 of each per class....

In the 1970s there was a little flurry of double-barrelled names. I have a Katy-Jane, an Emma-Jane and 2 Anne-Maries in my circle.

Only the Anne-Maries are still double-barrelled. Both the others dropped the Jane decades ago.

Fundamentally though, the issue is that both parents have to agree on a name. So, if you can't make this work, you both need to agree on something else.

As a compromise measure, you could use Sue as the middle name without the hyphen, but let your wife treat it like a hyphenated name.

I have a name like this. My mother wanted me to be called, say, Mary-Lou, but I insisted from a young age that I wanted to be just Mary. I was delighted when I saw that on my actual birth certificate I was Mary Lou Smith, not Mary-Lou Smith. So I've never had any problems going by just Mary Smith, and only mentioning Lou as my middle name when absolutely necessary.

If I'd wanted to be called Mary Lou, though, I could have been. I wouldn't use this style of name for a child myself, but Ellie Sue Surname gives you that bit of flexibility with it - you can call her Ellie, your wife can call her Ellie Sue, and she'll develop a preference eventually and choose for herself.

Those are far classier than current trends though

I had school friends that had hyphened names and in school no one bullied them for it. All of them did drop the second part when they were older though. I don’t know how it affected applications, but considering the vast amount of unusual names now days I don’t think people would think much about it.

I don't disagree. Double-barrelled first names are the epitome of "chav". But despite what is on the birth certificate you can just continuously call her Ellie rather than Ellie-Sue. Most people will follow suit and eventually she will just be Ellie.
When she is older, she can legally change her name.

I know someone with three boys who all have double barrelled names, but the second part of the names is the same for all three. It's SO tacky and quite embarrassing when she reels them off, but they are a very immature couple.

Yes me too although lots of people have taken it upon themselves to.try and use only one name over the years and I really don't know why
If you introduced yourself as Patricia for example of would be very rude someone ,to decide to call you Trish

Given the child will have her surname I think you shouldn't have to be stuck with a first name you have doubts about. FWIW, I think everyone subconsciously judges names (even people who claim they don't)but once you meet someone and get to know them their name becomes irrelevant.

Double barrelled names are so over done.

I work with children and they all seem to be Lexi-Mai, Darcie-Mai, Evie-May, Ella-Rose, Isla-Grace, Mia-Rose, Ava-Grace, Daisy-May, Ivy-May, Mila-Rose, Olivia-Rose, Ellie-May.

So dull.

I also have a double-barrelled name (very close to the ones mentioned). I am over 50 and never had any issues (been through university and have a professional job). I use both names (mainly because I dislike the first one).

When naming my children, both parents had to agree.

I have one of the former double barrell type name and agree there is a difference with the former ,and Lexie-May, type .

I’m not a fan of double barrelled names - it just seems to make things more complicated than necessary.
My eldest is 19 and there were a quite few name-Mai/May or Rose-name his age or a bit older during his school years. Not come across very many in under early teen age though.
You really can have a good guess at someone’s birth year from their name - Sharon and Tracey, Kevin and Wayne were my school cohort!

Agree with double first names sounding a bit common. I’d be more worried about her view as she’s carrying the baby she should get more say. She wouldn’t say that if you were a man, and how often will she say that in the future?

I don't really understand this name = a certain class thing. So to me it doesn't sound common and as a teacher I can safely say nobody I've taught ever got bullied over a double barrelled name, not even the girl that had a double barrelled first name and surname and had 10 syllables in her name! So if that's your only reason for vetoing it then you are being unreasonable!

Your wife is being unreasonable to play the "well I'm carrying the baby" card. Honestly I'd try nip that one in the bud. You don't want that to become a thing when the baby is here "well I carried the baby so...."

As long as she gets into Cambridge!

As Pandora Braithwaite one said:

Go to Oxford or die.
Go to Cambridge and live.

It's really not only on MN.

Like it or not, names say something about you. It's not all hyphenated names...Marie-Clare or Anne-Marie are not in the same category as the endless Gracie-Mae or Ellie-Rae.

Omg the disappointment when Eleanor Suzanne ends up having a gavel free occupation.

My type of gal then! 😎

Eleanor Suzanne also has something of the rebel in her.

Double barrelled first names are as common as muck, (as my mother would have said.) So many poor girls were lumbered with names such as Lacey May etc in the past few years, people rightly or wrongly judge people by their names and would never would be expected to succeed in school.

A girl I grew up with suddenly decided to double barrel her first and middle names towards the end of high school. They were really typical names too, think Anne as the middle name and Holly as first name.

She just started putting a hyphen in and signing cards as Holly-Anne, I felt a bit embarrassed for her 🤣 I didn’t even know what her middle name was until this point.

These days, even her mum puts Holly-Anne when talking about her on social media etc, when she’s the one that gave her a normal first and middle name which were used as such until she was a teenager. Weird!

There’s quite a few double names around these days and I find a lot of them quite jarring. Names that just don’t even go well together. Like Layla-Violet or Tina-Daisy. As though parents just both liked a different name so stuck them together regardless of how it sounds.

We don't use the gavel in English courts.

I agree with you OP.

I also think both parents have to at least like the name