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AIBU?

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Original poster

To never invite them again.

291 replies

PatrickDog · 10/05/2025 19:21

We have just come today from a holiday with my parents, me, DS and his girlfriend.

Just to add DS and his girlfriend asked to come and everyone had their own space, they had their own room and were able to do whatever they wanted and when so not tied to us.

Neither DS nor his girlfriend paid to come bar their spends as my parents wanted to do something nice. Previously to this I have spent limited time with the girlfriend and thought she seemed nice. She stays over a couple of times a week but I just leave them to it.

On holiday DS girlfriend complained about absolutely everything!

We stayed at a resort. On site the entertainment ended at 10.30pm and last orders was 11pm. DS girlfriend complained every single night how she couldn't believe it. We were very near a major nightlife place they could have got a taxi for less than a fiver and stayed out late.

Some of the on site attractions only opened in the afternoon. She complained. Again there was lots just off site.

DS and his girlfriend went to a paid for attraction of their choosing. Girlfriend complained the entire way round that certain small sections weren't open. The main things were. She also moaned that they had been rushed out to the attraction they had chose (at 2pm, it shut at 5!)

On the last full day she had a complete strop about DS wanting to go to the pool for the first time and screamed at DS who then skulked about miserable.

On the flight and journey home DS was out of character really rude to one of my parents who is now (rightly) absolutely livid as they paid for something special for DS girlfriend to moan all week and DS to shout and be rude to them.

Between them they ruined my parents holiday and in turn mine because now I'm getting it in the neck from both sides because DS is angry at being called out for his behaviour and my parents are massively pissed by the behaviour of both.

Neither of them thanked my parents for their free holiday.

I'm pretty upset tbh.

OP posts:
IberianBlackout · 10/05/2025 20:15

YANBU and frankly I’d cut down her time round yours. She needs to get a grip.

Once upon a time my family offered my best friend a holiday abroad (just my friend and I staying with family friends) and it ended up being a shit show. She turned out to be rude and entitled and I was beyond mortified because I stayed with the family before, no issues.
Taught us to never offer anyone anything lol.

Never2many · 10/05/2025 20:15

I would be fuming and would make it very clear that she is no longer welcome in your house. In fact I would tell your DS and I would tell her directly if he dares to bring her round that she is no longer welcome so they’ll have to stay somewhere else.

My DS pulled a similar stunt once but not on holiday but during a meal out we took him and his GF to. They sat whispering to each other, constantly on phones, never acknowledged us once even though it was an expensive meal in an expensive restaurant he had chosen.

And when we got back he and the gf disappeared upstairs without even a thank you.

I was fuming, and in the morning made my feelings very clear.

She cried and pulled the “my mental health” card because I’d dared to pull her up on her behaviour, something which no-one ever did because she would be too fragile. But I wasn’t having it, and I told DS in no uncertain terms that if he was going to behave like that and allow his GF to behave like it he wouldn’t go far in life because no-one would want to put up with him.

Fortunately they split up not long after that. I’d like to say he saw the light but unfortunately she was shagging someone else and dumped him.

But he’s now with a lovely girl, and two years on is still embarrassed about their behaviour then.

YourLoyalPlumOP · 10/05/2025 20:12

PatrickDog · 10/05/2025 19:21

We have just come today from a holiday with my parents, me, DS and his girlfriend.

Just to add DS and his girlfriend asked to come and everyone had their own space, they had their own room and were able to do whatever they wanted and when so not tied to us.

Neither DS nor his girlfriend paid to come bar their spends as my parents wanted to do something nice. Previously to this I have spent limited time with the girlfriend and thought she seemed nice. She stays over a couple of times a week but I just leave them to it.

On holiday DS girlfriend complained about absolutely everything!

We stayed at a resort. On site the entertainment ended at 10.30pm and last orders was 11pm. DS girlfriend complained every single night how she couldn't believe it. We were very near a major nightlife place they could have got a taxi for less than a fiver and stayed out late.

Some of the on site attractions only opened in the afternoon. She complained. Again there was lots just off site.

DS and his girlfriend went to a paid for attraction of their choosing. Girlfriend complained the entire way round that certain small sections weren't open. The main things were. She also moaned that they had been rushed out to the attraction they had chose (at 2pm, it shut at 5!)

On the last full day she had a complete strop about DS wanting to go to the pool for the first time and screamed at DS who then skulked about miserable.

On the flight and journey home DS was out of character really rude to one of my parents who is now (rightly) absolutely livid as they paid for something special for DS girlfriend to moan all week and DS to shout and be rude to them.

Between them they ruined my parents holiday and in turn mine because now I'm getting it in the neck from both sides because DS is angry at being called out for his behaviour and my parents are massively pissed by the behaviour of both.

Neither of them thanked my parents for their free holiday.

I'm pretty upset tbh.

The fact they never even said thank you would be enough reason for me to never invite them or her again

Strictlymad · 10/05/2025 20:10

How awful to moan and whinge and spoil it but when you’ve been paid for! I’m not surprised your parents are livid. He needs to go round and grovel

LivingLaVidaBabyShower · 10/05/2025 20:10

ElfAndSafetyBored · 10/05/2025 19:48

I understand this entirely but it might cause a rift with your son. It’s just not worth it.

Sit them down and say how disappointed you are with their behaviour. Point out that you don’t like treating them children but that’s what they behaved like. Tell them that’s the end of it but they should apologise to the grandparents (meaning it), that you’ll leave that to them.

Then move on, continue calling out bad behaviour and don’t invite them anywhere for free.

They are from the snowflake entitled generation. But that’s not an excuse and they need educating out of it.

Show quote history

Agreed.
It's all good and well people telling you he'd be moving out, she'd be banned etc but realistically you need a calm clear the air chat where you can draw a line under it and move on.

Thisisittheapocalypse · 10/05/2025 20:08

I would be beyond livid at the sheer entitlement to take, take, take whilst moaning about everything. I'd also strongly suggest that he should move out if he felt his behaviour or his girlfriend's was acceptable at any level or no grovelling apology to your parents or you wasn't forthcoming.

Bunnyisputbackinthebox · 10/05/2025 20:01

Tell them you expect your dps to be reimbursed for their share of the holiday. And mean it.
We once took ds and his mate (both 15) to Portugal.. The mate was an utter shit.. Ds not much better.. Sent them home on a plane after the first week. Took me 3 months to get the flight costs back from his dps.. Never spoke to them again..
Oh and his trip cost them his passport fee and nothing else...
Vowed never take anyone again.

thepariscrimefiles · 10/05/2025 20:00

I certainly wouldn't allow stroppy girlfriend to stay over any more. Their behaviour was disgraceful and you should make your son apologise to your parents.

chatgptsbestmate · 10/05/2025 19:59

Gosh .....the girlfriend sounds awful but DS seems as though he might be a wimp (I was going to say whipped but that's quite rude) .....surely he should have realised how vile his girlfriend was being and asked her to stfu.

Obviously DS should send his grandparents a card and a gift to say sorry and thank you

Girlfriend should too, but you have zero leverage with her

AngelicKaty · 10/05/2025 19:57

PatrickDog · 10/05/2025 19:35

21 and 23 which makes it even worse. Both adults!

Show quote history

Heavens above OP, from your earlier posts I assumed they were teenagers! 😳 Well it's time these two learned there are consequences for their appallingly ungrateful behaviour, ruining yours and your DPs holiday as a result. Does DS and his GF know that she is no longer welcome to stay over with him at your house twice a week?

VirgosNeedGoals · 10/05/2025 19:52

I'd be absolutely fuming if anyone treated my parents like this. It sounds like you did everything you could and she's just a spoilt brat who has him under the thumb. Time he moved out.

ElfAndSafetyBored · 10/05/2025 19:51

Also, please ask your parent to accept any apology gracefully.

it is easier to apologise if you know you won’t be hauled over the coals all over again - no matter how bad your misdemeanour is.

Original poster
PatrickDog · 10/05/2025 19:49

Evaka · 10/05/2025 19:40

Fair play for calling her out OP. What an utter brat. Hope your son is having second thoughts, she won't be good for him as a partner.

I'd hoped so but he's dropped everything to go out with her tonight so don't think I'm that lucky.

OP posts:
ElfAndSafetyBored · 10/05/2025 19:48

PatrickDog · 10/05/2025 19:35

I don't want her in my house at all.

Show quote history

I understand this entirely but it might cause a rift with your son. It’s just not worth it.

Sit them down and say how disappointed you are with their behaviour. Point out that you don’t like treating them children but that’s what they behaved like. Tell them that’s the end of it but they should apologise to the grandparents (meaning it), that you’ll leave that to them.

Then move on, continue calling out bad behaviour and don’t invite them anywhere for free.

They are from the snowflake entitled generation. But that’s not an excuse and they need educating out of it.

Original poster
PatrickDog · 10/05/2025 19:47

Totallytoti · 10/05/2025 19:41

I’d be so embarrassed to have raised a child like this. Why didn’t you pull him up right then and there. And as for that horrible girlfriend why didn’t you tell her to be grateful and have some respect for everyone. They both sound a disgrace.

I absolutely bollocked DS in front of my parents and his girlfriend the second he was rude to my parents.
As I said it was out of character for him but I'm still livid.
I've also had words since we got back.
As I've said earlier I spoke to the girlfriend too.
He won't go near my parents currently because he knows how angry they are.

OP posts:
ThejoyofNC · 10/05/2025 19:47

Are you going to speak to them about it? And make them buy a thank you present.

BMW6 · 10/05/2025 19:44

Time he moved out I think. Certainly I would tell him that she is not to set foot in your house again. Their behaviour was outrageous and both owe your parents a massive apology.

Totallytoti · 10/05/2025 19:43

In my day if parents or grandparents were around and we visited a bf/gf place there wasn’t anything we wouldn’t do to show our gratitude or respect. It’s disgusting how children and young adults behave today. But then again my dp’s would have given you a smack for this behaviour and now it’s al wishy washy gentle parenting. Don’t allow her in your home and tell her why. If your ds doesn’t like it then he can go bugger off with her. Disgraceful pair

NineteenSeventyNine · 10/05/2025 19:42

Have you had a firm chat with DS about her (and his) behaviour? And has he apologised to your parents?

FiendsandFairies · 10/05/2025 19:42

Cripes! What a cow!

NoBiscuitsLeftInMyTin · 10/05/2025 19:42

Totallytoti · 10/05/2025 19:41

I’d be so embarrassed to have raised a child like this. Why didn’t you pull him up right then and there. And as for that horrible girlfriend why didn’t you tell her to be grateful and have some respect for everyone. They both sound a disgrace.

I suspect that DS is severely under the thumb from from his GF and hopefully this is the wake up call he needs. Ungrateful bitch.

Ponderingwindow · 10/05/2025 19:41

Do you think your son was happy to the the holiday? You may not have anything to worry about.

Totallytoti · 10/05/2025 19:41

I’d be so embarrassed to have raised a child like this. Why didn’t you pull him up right then and there. And as for that horrible girlfriend why didn’t you tell her to be grateful and have some respect for everyone. They both sound a disgrace.

Evaka · 10/05/2025 19:40

Fair play for calling her out OP. What an utter brat. Hope your son is having second thoughts, she won't be good for him as a partner.

IveGotAnUnusuallyLargePelvisISwear · 10/05/2025 19:38

Honestly, I’d read my child the riot act if they dared behaved that way. And like you OP I wouldn’t want that insufferable madam in my home ever again.

He needs to give his grandparents a heartfelt apology and to thank them properly for the holiday that they paid for.