Baby at fertility show?

There is so much wrong with your behavior here...it's difficult to know where to start.

That must have been horrific and I take a different stance to you. The NHS being crass and insensitive doesn’t give carte Blanche to anyone to do the same.

I was barking mad when I had IVF though, so the OP seems mild to me.

I think it’s tone deaf as well as practically inappropriate.

I was in the packed waiting room on a fertility clinic (we’re talking 20 women) and a couple brought in their toddler…dad could have just gone to a coffee shop round the corner, but nooooooo. We had loud performance parenting and this kid watching cartoons, no headphones, off the dad’s phone.

FFS. Read the room.

Some people will pick at anything 🤣 I’m not talking about the baby but the wider audience.

And some replies are unnecessarily twatty.

you can say you think someone is BU without being personal.

You've changed your tune slightly to your OP ...

I lost a baby in the second trimester and often babies and young children will be with their parents at her shared graveside. It doesn't get much more intense than that and I still don't have a problem with it. I see babies everywhere I go including on the ward where I lost mine.

Sorry if i'm being insensitive but I don't get it.

That baby might have been an ivf baby, and those parents might have gone through their own years of struggle to have the baby and be attending with a view for a future baby.

I think it's understandable that you would feel it's inappropriate and not like seeing a baby at that kind of event, but I think that's a you problem to deal with those feelings rather than police babies at an event like that

It’s a little insensitive I think.

Their first child could have been a long journey to conceive and they are facing that prospect again?

If the child is still a baby I don’t think secondary infertility is likely.

Problem is, fertility treatment isn’t just for the infertile.

It is also for secondary infertility, for same sex couples, for those with genetic disorders where they may need to use sperm/egg donors and single women.

So I do think YABU, although that’s said with kindness and a MN type fist bump, as I do get how gruelling it is 👍🏻 And I hope it works for you!

You said ‘fairly vocal’ during the conference

so to me that doesn’t sound too bad. It wasn’t a university lecture. You can’t really complain about a baby being a baby, during the breaks …

It doesn't always work.

Yes they are part of life, but if you are struggling with infertility, shouldn't a fertility show be the one place you can safely expect not to see babies?

Perhaps the baby is living proof that fertility treatment works and worth the expense. Yes, the baby shouldn't be disrupting talks, but it's harsh to complain about them entertaining a baby during breaks.

Some people think that being around babies will help getting pregnant, they love and want babies, and are happy for others who have babies …

then there are people like you, who don’t want to see any babies while they learn about infertility and think seeing a baby or being exposed to one is “insensitive” to your feelings.

You should ask the provider to organize special environment for you.

Whatever the event not removing a crying baby that's stopping other attendees hearing the talk is inconsistent and selfish, surely that goes without saying

Would you stay where you knew your baby was ruining a talk for others?

‘Quietly in a corner’

really?

Don’t think there was an issue with a baby being present, they are part of life whether you have one or not. But, as with any other event, if a baby or child is being disruptive they should be taken out.

I agree it seems odd, but they must have some sort of fertility issue because it’s not like it’s somewhere you’d choose for a fun day out with your baby. No one would go if they didn’t feel like they would benefit from the information.

They should have taken a disruptive baby outside. But I think attending with a baby is generally fine - some could sleep through the whole thing and that would be ok.

Your op said it was a ‘family building’ event

they did nothing wrong imo

I think saying they may have secondary infertility is a bit of a push as they can’t have had much time to even try for a second child if they only have a baby. Serious lectures are no place for a baby especially with the sensitive topics being discussed.

I don't really see the issue.

I haven't had fertility troubles thankfully but have suffered with miscarriages (late). I don't think i'd have a problem with a baby coming along to a discussion because people who are already parents can still be going through loss.

It might sound cruel but babies are everywhere you go.

I think fine to bring the baby if that’s what they had to do. Not fine at all to disrupt the talk - one of them should have taken the baby out.

Secondary infertility is a thing, and families that need support with that shouldn’t be excluded.