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Original poster

Ðaughter had £280 took off her from her Dad

162 replies

NimbleBee · 09/05/2025 14:55

Hi all, my 7yr old DD has been visiting her grandparents with my ex (her Dad) every Wednesday. Her Grandparents have been giving my DD £5 every week for a year so 52x5=£260 saved. DD saved it at grandparents house in a purse, hoping to spend it on her holiday.
Dd told me yesterday that grandparents had given her this money to bring home now with upcoming holiday.
Dds dad took the money from her and spent it in the Ladbrokes gambling and on alcohol and cigarettes.
I am absolutely fuming and will be having words with ex.
Aibu to tell grandparents what has happened?

OP posts:
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Vodkafairy99 · 13/05/2025 05:19

What an arsehat. Defo tell his parents. Poor wee poppet must be devestated 😔

rwalker · 12/05/2025 09:03

Tell the grandparents and step away from it . Let them deal don’t get caught up in that shit storm

ladydoe · 12/05/2025 09:01

I think this is just a troll post

XWKD · 11/05/2025 10:29

As a matter of interest, how does your daughter know what he spent it on?

AllThatGlistensIsntCold · 11/05/2025 10:05

Laurmolonlabe · 11/05/2025 09:11

Tell your ex unless he gives it back, and never does that again you will go to court and make sure he loses visitation rights-end of. Tell his parents.
That kind of trauma could scar your daughter for life and affect her attitude towards money-simply unacceptable.

Surely OP's daughter will tell her grandparents?

I would if I was 7 and my dad stole my £260 - £280 (OP can't decide which!)

Laurmolonlabe · 11/05/2025 09:11

Tell your ex unless he gives it back, and never does that again you will go to court and make sure he loses visitation rights-end of. Tell his parents.
That kind of trauma could scar your daughter for life and affect her attitude towards money-simply unacceptable.

Parmaviollets · 11/05/2025 08:37

@AllThatGlistensIsntCold bizzare op hasn't returned

AllThatGlistensIsntCold · 11/05/2025 08:17

Parmaviollets · 11/05/2025 08:06

Bizarre that in these circumstances she was made to keep her money there? Much better to open a little bank account for her in her name and get the money in there.

Bizarre that the child hasn't told her grandparents it's gone missing or her Dad has taken the purse and spent it.
No need for the OP to tell the grandparents as surely her daughter will!

AllThatGlistensIsntCold · 11/05/2025 08:15

This is a waste of time as @NimbleBee isn't joining in her thread but...the timeline here makes no sense.

The only people who know about the purse with the money are the OP, the grandparents, the DD and her Dad.

How was the money shown to be missing?

Did the DD find her purse and the cash was gone? If she did, she'd immediately ask her grandparents where it was.

Are we to believe that the Dad took the money from his daughter on their way home and immediately spent it - and she was there at the time?

It makes no sense. And IMO that's why OP is not coming back.

Rather than accusing him of stealing it might be a good idea to consider the reality of what's supposedly occurred.

Parmaviollets · 11/05/2025 08:06

Bizarre that in these circumstances she was made to keep her money there? Much better to open a little bank account for her in her name and get the money in there.

BlackCoffeeAndSugar · 11/05/2025 00:59

StupidBoy · 09/05/2025 15:08

I'm a bit confused about how a 7 year old knows for sure that he spent it on fags, booze and Ladbrokes bookies, though. Presumbly it was her who told ou this? She wouldn't have been allowed in there with him, so how would she know? I doubt he told her.

Can't comment on the OPs DD but in my experience from my line of work then yeah children know. They know when their parents drink /take drugs/are in fights etc. Generally when parents are doing these things they don't have the awareness to hide it from the children. The children are generally hypervigalent.

SD1978 · 10/05/2025 23:22

id tell them so they know that any future money should be handed/ sent straight to you and they have an absolute arsehole of a son

Pupinskipops · 10/05/2025 23:21

It's theft. They should know.

Mmoyo · 10/05/2025 22:30

Glad that he is now your EX.

SecondVerseSameAsThe1st · 10/05/2025 22:28

Another post and disappear. Waste of time and hard to believe. 🙄

DorothyStorm · 10/05/2025 22:24

GreenFressia · 10/05/2025 22:07

You can go a step further than this and report it to the police, if you so wished.

Yes. Absolutely.

What an awful man. But yes tell the grandparents.

Iceboy80 · 10/05/2025 22:20

As a father I find this absolutely disgusting, it's shocking tbh to think a father could do this.

GreenFressia · 10/05/2025 22:07

You can go a step further than this and report it to the police, if you so wished.

värskekapsas · 10/05/2025 22:03

How awful! She is so little and been saving that money for such a long time for him to just take it away from her. I bet she will remember this for life :( I would absolutely tell grandparents and insist he must reimburse her immediately. What a scumbag|!

Fernticket · 10/05/2025 21:53

Your ex is a cunt. Pure and simple

T1Dmama · 10/05/2025 21:46

ASimpleLampoon · 10/05/2025 20:33

@NimbleBee
Police and social services. Seriously . It's financial abuse.

Also if there's a court order for contact get legal advice asap and ask for limited/supervised contact

Do you get on with GPs? Are they safe people? Can you maintain the relationship without your ex.

Could you discuss with the GPS the possibility of setting up a child's bank account with you or one of them as the trustee to keep her money safe.

I am so sorry for you and your DD and the GPs too.

Agree with this.. maybe ask grandparents to give her cheques that can be paid into her own little account.
man’s yes it is financial abuse.. what a waste of space! I’d stop contact with him too and tell social services why

T1Dmama · 10/05/2025 21:43

AllThatGlistensIsntCold · 10/05/2025 21:12

£260 or £280 is a huge amount of spending money for a 7 year old child.

Does that matter? It’s still her money

T1Dmama · 10/05/2025 21:42

Where was DD while he popped in Ladbrokes and drank??
yes I’d 100% tell the grandparents!
Id be texting him too and telling him he’s stolen £260 off his daughter and you want it paid back into your account for her asap ! If he doesn’t I’d be tempted to report to police.. what a scum bag

TheHerboriste · 10/05/2025 21:29

Sickening. Of course you should tell them.

AllThatGlistensIsntCold · 10/05/2025 21:28

aylis · 10/05/2025 21:19

It doesn't even matter what he spent it on, he stole it. Absolutely tell them.

I'm puzzled. I doubt he told his daughter where the money had gone.
I cannot believe a dad would tell a 7 year old he's spent it a 'Ladbrokes' and on beer and fags.

If the OP knows, who told her?