Unfair to defer summer borns

That's good to hear, thank you.

I agree with you op. Someone has to be the youngest! If a child is genuinely behind developmentally then I can understand....but I think too many who defer are just competitive middle class types who can't bear the idea that their little darlings won't be top of the class.

What does happen with bus passes etc when they reach year 11? It's only for 16 year olds and they would have already turned 17 ...

Also, imagine if you were doing 6th form when 19... And having to wear a school uniform....

That’s just life. He can do it when he reaches the age!!

I'm July and also would have benefit a lot from being deferred I think.

I still remember being kept back from going to lunch with the other kids, just because I didn't really understand some kind of maths puzzle we'd been sent. I had turned 4 only a few months earlier ffs.

The Education Act 1996 allowed children to start school the term after their 5th birthday. But it’s become more common in the last 10 years or so with awareness growing.

There is another thread running on this topic and there are so many people saying they would defer so there child has an advantage.

Whislt it may be an advantage in the early years, what about when the child is in Yr 10 at school? They know they should really be in Y11 now and leaving, but instead they are staying on another year. It's all well and good having an academic advantage, but children notice these differences and it could be a reason for bullying , or your child thinking they were not clever enough to start in their own cohert . Especially those born in May/June who are deferred.

Unfortunately being the biggest and strongest in her class is not the reason this boy has injured her - if anything if he thinks it’s ok to injure other kids it shows poor level of maturity to me so he might be behind his age group.
the big issue is making sure she is protected so if not done already I would insist she is not near him during any activity

I wished I could have deferred DD1 very late August born - I think though she did okay in end at Uni - it would have been less stressful for her and us and in end extra year would have meant little.

At time though only way to defer was to go into Y1 - and school wouldn't keep the place. We since moved to Wales and many GCSE exams are sat or even finished in Y10 so did feel she was at a disadavtage.

DS is just summer born though and actually felt he was more behind socially and academically for many years - more so that DD1.

Though 16 + was an issue getting gov bus passes just at peak time for college as her brithday was so late and then her feeling left behind as not old enough to work post GCSE - wanted 16 + - felling left out of pubs clebrations as they truned 18 much earlier in year and being just 18 and then off.

About 10 years ago

My eldest was born early August and we didn't defer, and while a bit emotionally immature at certain points throughout primary, is now thriving in secondary - predicted to do well in his GCSEs, you couldn't pick him out of a line-up of his mates as a summerborn. You know your child best, deferring is not for everyone.

Size is a poor way to determine school groupings. Someone will always be the tinyist.
Those deferred need to be deferred based on social and physical maturity not weight and height.

does anyone know when this deferring became so common?

I was at primary in the 90s and nobody deferred. I can’t think of a single person in my schooling that was held back, including August borns.

This has always been the case in Scotland, Easily 15 months between children or more in any year group. It is not an issue. Tiny 4 year olds starting formal learning is way more of an issue.

I've had posters on this forum telling me that I have disadvantaged my summer born child by not deferring.

Well then, unfortunately for them, they are in for a nasty shock if they think it will remain that easy. The pressure for them to skip a year in primary will start soon, and if they resist that they will have to navigate the secondary deferment process. I'm dreading it.

@ICantPretend op wanted opinions. Otherwise Mumsnet would all just be saying ‘ You do you’ and ‘ it’s whatever is best for your family’ yawn.

A tall / big child doesn't always hurt shorter/ smaller children.

Are you suggesting that only short or sleight children get to defer?

Not all choices are equally valid especially when they impact other children and families. If I wanted my 10 year old to join Reception then would you have the same ethos?

It’s not a popular opinion op, but I agree with you. There has to be a line drawn somewhere and then if individual children have specific needs, that should be accommodated on a case by case basis. I know a child who has been put into the year below due to additional needs and it’s been written into the EHCP for them. That’s how it should work imo.

My ds is summer born, now in y7. He has always been head and shoulders taller than the autumn born kids in his year, he looks so out of place that when he moved schools in y5 and was sharing sweets for his birthday, a parent I’d just met asked if he was deferred. When I looked at him among the kids in the year below, where he could have been placed, it was ridiculous.
The reality was that aged 4, he could already read fluently, was doing his sisters maths work, and was 99th percentile for height. It would have been completely wrong of me to defer him just because of when his birthday was. Another year at preschool would have been a nightmare.

Not to mention that there is already a problem in finding childcare for younger children. If the places are full of kids who should be in school it’s not helping! I see too many kids being babied, when they are perfectly capable of doing things. This is just another example.

I chose not to defer my ds who is aug 29th birthday and now he has to repeat the whole reception year (which I didn’t know was possible till the HT called us for a meeting).

In my country it’s far more common for summer born children to be deferred. I’ve known people with children who turned four in January that have been deferred until the following year. If a child has a birthday after March they are usually deferred where I am. Some schools don’t take children unless their 4th birthday is before 1st April on the year they are due to start school. I personally don’t think it does any harm for children to be a little bit older starting school, I believe the research suggests the positives outweigh the negatives but haven’t seen much of it myself just have heard from others that have looked at research on the subject. I think it is better to move towards deferring being the norm rather than the exception.

If you're jealous, OP, just defer your child. Otherwise just let others choose what they are legally do for their own children and crack on with yours.

Well, then you made the best decision for you and your child. Other families make different decisions - so what?

They certainly don’t need medical evidence everywhere. My friend’s son has no medical needs, he’s neurotypical and had no ‘need’, she just wanted to defer him so she did. Wasn’t hard work at all.