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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU being against my neighbor having a party on the same day as my DC’s?

162 replies

Mocha0202 · 07/05/2025 13:39

its my DC’s first birthday and I sent out invitations a month ago. I also invited my neighbor.
i will have a few babies over and about 12 adults.

A couple of days ago my neighbor told me she’s planning on having a party in her garden (that’s over the hedge from mine), with a big bbq and about 20-25 adults. They will be outside from the morning until the night, alcohol obviously involved.

I am concerned about the noise and the smoke overstimulating the children and basically ruining my party.
AIBU for thinking that it’s a very inconsiderate thing to do and asking her to change the date of her party?

OP posts:
Pinkl · 07/05/2025 14:06

Its very easy to get caught up with these special milestones - especially for your first! But It will be fine. Please don’t make a big thing of this. I have an ex friend who hasn’t spoken to me for about 15 years as I missed her daughters 1st birthday as my own child was in hospital. She was frosty when I cancelled and didn’t return any of my calls after that.

HoppingPavlova · 07/05/2025 14:06

Oh dear OP, this is one of those stories you will tell with much hilarity in 10 years when you realise how batshit you were. There is absolutely zero problem having events at the same time. Your neighbours probably having the biggest chuckle.

vodkaredbullgirl · 07/05/2025 14:02

How dare they 🙄

4pmwinetimebebeh · 07/05/2025 14:02

OP you’re having a really hard time here but I get it. We’ve lived in a terrace with tiny gardens and a party next door makes a big impact! It’s fine and obviously they can do what they want but music, chatting etc form a lot of people is noisy and if you’re trying to play games or speak to people it will impact. It’s not you being selfish but if you’re worried ask her which day and maybe move your party if possible.

This is a mother with a less than 1 year old baby be kind everyone jesus

MargaretThursday · 07/05/2025 14:02

😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

In about 5 years time come back to MN and look out for a "silly things I did with my PFB" thread.
You'll have at least one thing to put on it.

godmum56 · 07/05/2025 14:00

Get. Over Yourself.

WhyamIinahandcartandwherearewegoing · 07/05/2025 14:00

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Original poster
Mocha0202 · 07/05/2025 13:59

No, of course I don’t own her garden.
both gardens are really tiny, I can’t even change the time of my party to earlier because she said she’ll be there from early morning until the night.

I get everyone’s point of view, it’s just my babies 1st birthday and maybe I’m being overprotective and worry too much. I know I can’t dictate what she does but if I could avoid them being on at the same time it would be great.

I said earlier that I asked her to change the date of her party. Actually she said she will have hers on Saturday or Sunday, so I asked her to tell me which day exactly so that I can change my party.

OP posts:
menopause59 · 07/05/2025 13:58

Mocha0202 · 07/05/2025 13:39

its my DC’s first birthday and I sent out invitations a month ago. I also invited my neighbor.
i will have a few babies over and about 12 adults.

A couple of days ago my neighbor told me she’s planning on having a party in her garden (that’s over the hedge from mine), with a big bbq and about 20-25 adults. They will be outside from the morning until the night, alcohol obviously involved.

I am concerned about the noise and the smoke overstimulating the children and basically ruining my party.
AIBU for thinking that it’s a very inconsiderate thing to do and asking her to change the date of her party?

What has BBQ smoke got to do with overstimulating children.

Is this something i'm not aware of my neighbours love a BBQ and it has never ever crossed my mind

JHound · 07/05/2025 13:56

You are being massively unreasonable.

babystarsandmoon · 07/05/2025 13:54

I’m sure a 1st birthday party will be over and done with before theirs really kicks off.

SnowFrogJelly · 07/05/2025 13:52

YABVU your neighbours can do what they like in their own garden!

MattCauthon · 07/05/2025 13:51

I imagine she figured it was a great day - you'd be having a party yourselves so noise and general busyiness wouldn't be a problem.

YABU to even think, for a second, tht your neighbour has to take youru plans into account when making her own.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 07/05/2025 13:50

Hopefully this is a reverse, if not the world does not revolve around your plans!

Shockingly people have lives outside yours!

ZoggyStirdust · 07/05/2025 13:49

It’s not often a poster jumps the shark in the first post but this has done

lazycats · 07/05/2025 13:47

Assuming this isn’t a wind-up thread, yes, YABVU

lifemakeover · 07/05/2025 13:47

Didn't we have this a few weeks ago?

FunnysInLaJardin · 07/05/2025 13:47

lol

Azandme · 07/05/2025 13:46

Overstimulated?

🤣🤣🤣

PinkyFlamingo · 07/05/2025 13:46

I can't believe you even have to ask! Your party is not important to her and it's not your garden so if course she can have a BBQ

ThePoshUns · 07/05/2025 13:46

Haha oh dear

yeesh · 07/05/2025 13:45

Batshit 🤣

Octavia64 · 07/05/2025 13:45

Seriously? No, you can’t do this.

dogcatkitten · 07/05/2025 13:44

A good time I would say, you won't be annoying them and their party won't be annoying you as much if you are also partying. Are you not offering alcohol to the adults?

I thought you were going to say their party had pinched half your guests.

nomas · 07/05/2025 13:44

That’s ridiculous, you are not her boss. Either move your party date or wrap it up early before their party gets going.