How to handle sports day this year?

The problem is though, that with things like reading and maths, teachers make a big effort to try an minimise any possibility for public humiliation, and they're made as non competitive as possible (of course, children will often work out the 'good' or 'poor' groups).

You'd never have everyone stand up and read a book out loud to the whole school and their families, so you can see exactly which child still can't read Pat sat on the mat, and which is able to whizz through Shakespeare. But sports day revolves around finding out who is the fastest and slowest runner etc.

Different opinion but the kids who aren't good at Maths have to do it every day. Yes it's different but we can't always stay home on a day we might find difficult. My son on Yr 3 actually started worrying about his first Junior sports day the night before. The teacher said he could just do some of the fun events and not the running races but in the end he chose to do everything.

My mam used to let me have the day off and spend the day with my grandparents as long as I promised to do a few pages of maths and English books (simple sums and sentences) I loved her for it!

Sports day is utter shit.

Even if you take them to the supermarket and they have a go at mental arithmetic they’ll still have a better day.

Hey - my DD (10)hated sports day as well - every year was a struggle in build up to the day. Last year I asked the teacher if there was an alternate activity she could do to help with the event itself. Teacher was great and had her take pictures of the day instead on one of the school iPads, standing at finish line etc. I was going to take her out as you have to pick your battles and zero issue with attendance otherwise.

I’d just keep them off. I hated PE my whole school life and it didn’t affect my ability to work as a team or my resilience. I just wasn’t competitive and didn’t see the point. It made my life a complete misery and like your son, I dreaded sports day the whole year. I used to hate the sheer public humiliation of it.

Let sporty kids do the racing and let other kids keep score, or cheer, make banners, or organise drinks etc. Schools should get better at this and every child could find their thing to enjoy sports day instead of putting children off for life.

Dentist appointment/eye test? Miss the races, back for lessons? Don't make a big thing about it or make it a treat to miss school, as that will reinforce the avoidance for next year/the future. Just write it on the calendar and say "I've scheduled a dentist appointment that day so you might miss some of it, sorry"

I've always just told mine, they don't have to be the best,they just have to do their best and everyone has their own things they are good at, sports might not be their best thing but it's nice to be there and support their friends who it is their thing. I also remind them that for some children they might struggle every day with something like reading or maths that they find easy, so for some children it's nice that it's their turn to be good at something.

Could you take them out for the day to do an activity that gets them out of their comfort zone, but without the element of competition and all the spectators - which is what most unsporty kids hate the most about sports day? What about a day trip to a Go Ape centre?

It’s one day. Missing it will have zero impact on their resilience, but it will deepen their trust in you, showing them that you will protect them from situations that distress them.