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AIBU?

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Original poster

To feel like being attractive sometimes means people assume the worst?

32 replies

MySharpOliveExpert · 06/05/2025 13:52

I’ve always felt that some people put me in a box - “oh, she’s pretty, so she must have slept her way into this position” or “she’s only here because of how she looks.” But that’s never been how I operate and it’s frustrating to feel like my achievements are dismissed because of assumptions about my appearance.

Have others experienced this? AIBU to think that being attractive sometimes comes with unfair judgements?

OP posts:
Dweetfidilove · 06/05/2025 14:09

Pretty privilege does exist, so people will always have something to say and yes, you may have benefitted from being attractive.

Are you feeling out of your depth in your position or are your accomplishments in line with your abilities?

Coconutter24 · 06/05/2025 14:07

MySharpOliveExpert · 06/05/2025 14:01

They rarely say it outright, it’s more the subtle digs or the way certain achievements are downplayed. Sometimes it’s the tone, sometimes it’s the assumptions. I know others have it worse it different ways but it can still be frustrating to feel underestimated for the wrong reasons.

Show quote history

If no one has actually said those words then you’re putting an awful lot of words in someone’s mouth. You could be way off of what they think

Swiftie1878 · 06/05/2025 14:06

You know your own worth, and there are LOTS of benefits to being attractive, so focus on the positives.

Original poster
MySharpOliveExpert · 06/05/2025 14:01

SkaneTos · 06/05/2025 13:55

Do people really say those things to you? How rude of them.

They rarely say it outright, it’s more the subtle digs or the way certain achievements are downplayed. Sometimes it’s the tone, sometimes it’s the assumptions. I know others have it worse it different ways but it can still be frustrating to feel underestimated for the wrong reasons.

OP posts:
SkaneTos · 06/05/2025 13:55

Do people really say those things to you? How rude of them.

MiloMinderbinder925 · 06/05/2025 13:54

People will judge no matter what you do.

Changeyourlifes · 06/05/2025 13:53

In toxic workplaces, yes