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AIBU?

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DH embarrassed and blaming me

171 replies

Dreco · 06/05/2025 06:37

Currently in Italy. Yesterday DH and I went to the pier, it was pretty isolated, just a couple of men fishing. I saw a cave type thing with some statues inside it so we went to have a look however as we made our way towards it the ground became quite overgrown and difficult so I said he should go ahead and I’ll wait here for him. Told him to take photos. As I headed back I passed a couple who surprisingly spoke English (first English speaking people I’d spoken to since arriving). We exchanged pleasantries and then the woman went ahead to the cave - her DH held back like I did.

a few minutes later DH came stumbling back through the overgrown area, face bright red looking like he’d seen a ghost! I asked what was wrong and he gestured towards the car and hurried off towards it. We got in and this is what had happened at the cave …

DH heard the woman approaching the cave, assumed it was me - hid in said cave and then shouted “you’re scared!” Apparently the woman jumped out of her skin - DH came out of the cave, realised what he’d done and then basically made a hasty exit leaving the woman looking a little confused.

I thought it was hilarious - thankfully he didn’t say anything more inappropriate considering some of the daft stuff DH and I say to each other when nobody is around! He is somehow blaming me and not seeing the funny side. I can’t understand why he didn’t just apologise and tell her he thought it was his wife approaching! God knows what she must have thought and id love to know what she said to her husband afterwards 😂

AIBU to find it funny?! Despite how mortified DH is?

OP posts:
AngelicKaty · 06/05/2025 11:48

tanstaafl · 06/05/2025 07:39

slight missing the point but who shouts “you’re scared”?

Boo! - too old fashioned now?

I was just about to say the same thing. "Boo!" is definitely what DH and I say to each other - but we are old. 😂

Dweetfidilove · 06/05/2025 11:48

I don't know what's funniest...
You and your husband's silly games, him scuttling away or the interpretations on this thread.

I'm glad he's gotten over the embarrassment. This has made me laugh 😃.

Wholikesbreadandhoney · 06/05/2025 11:42

AthWat · 06/05/2025 11:36

How is laughing at something stupid someone has said a personal attack? It's the definition of mocking the argument rather than the arguer.

Well it might be stupid in YOUR opinion.

Obviously it's not stupid in MY opinion, otherwise I wouldn't have said it.

When somebody posts a serious comment and some other poster puts the laugh emoji on it they are not laughing at the comment so much as the person who said it.
It's a deliberate undermining of another person and an attempt to deter them from expressing their view point.

AngelicKaty · 06/05/2025 11:37

@Dreco "I can’t understand why he didn’t just apologise and tell her he thought it was his wife approaching!"
This. 👆 Honestly OP, if this is the most embarrassing thing that ever happens in life to your DH, he'll be doing well. He could have just laughed and said "sorry, I thought you were my wife". All over and done with.
Please tell your DH, from the MN collective, to stop being silly and get over himself. 😂

AthWat · 06/05/2025 11:36

Wholikesbreadandhoney · 06/05/2025 11:30

Posting a reply and pointing out why you think it's stupid is totally different from putting a mocking emoji on a post that only the poster can see.

Just mocking someone for saying something is just down right nasty and is a personal attack.

Personal attacks are supposed to be against MN guidelines but many of the posters on this thread are happy to get round the guidelines by using the emoji to bully other posters off the thread.

Edited

How is laughing at something stupid someone has said a personal attack? It's the definition of mocking the argument rather than the arguer.

Wholikesbreadandhoney · 06/05/2025 11:30

AthWat · 06/05/2025 10:10

Surely its about posting opinions and then having those opinions challenged or responded to. Not just a space for everyone to say whatever they like, however stupid, without fear of being told what people think of your opinion.
Why do you think you have some sort of right to say what you like and nobody has a right to say "That's stupid."?

Posting a reply and pointing out why you think it's stupid is totally different from putting a mocking emoji on a post that only the poster can see.

Just mocking someone for saying something is just down right nasty and is a personal attack.

Personal attacks are supposed to be against MN guidelines but many of the posters on this thread are happy to get round the guidelines by using the emoji to bully other posters off the thread.

ItGhoul · 06/05/2025 11:22

Walkingonmoss · 06/05/2025 07:00

It’s not even remotely funny. That poor woman. She must have been terrified. He should have apologized and explained and checked she was okay. A lone woman in an enclosed space with a man trying to scare her. Hardly hilarious.

You have no idea of her background or experiences, whether she has a history of trauma or assault, and yet your reaction is ‘LOL’, rather than checking she is ok, and making sure she gets an explanation of what happened, so that she can understand it.

Shameful behaviour from both you and your husband. Are both 12?

Speaking as someone who actually has been assaulted… this is a colossal overreaction

BunnyLake · 06/05/2025 11:05

LittleBitofBread · 06/05/2025 11:02

yes, then went off laughing with her partner.

She’s probably re-told the story herself. Now whether she’s told it to her friends or a therapist we’ll never know. 🤔

balloonraces · 06/05/2025 11:03

hilarious !!

LittleBitofBread · 06/05/2025 11:02

Nomoreidea · 06/05/2025 11:01

OP says the woman jumped out of her skin

yes, then went off laughing with her partner.

Nomoreidea · 06/05/2025 11:01

Gyozas · 06/05/2025 10:47

Imagine she’s given it no thought at all. A man jumping out near some crude wooden renderings of fisherman, looking mortified and scuttling off, and then being seen in the car park with his wife…?

OP says the woman jumped out of her skin

Dinosweetpea · 06/05/2025 10:55

This is hilarious 🤣🤣🤣 some serious sense of humour fails on here this morning.

ISpyNoPlumPie · 06/05/2025 10:55

Oh god. I’ve loved this thread, and some of the responses have left me in tears (happy tears).

It reminds me of a plan I hatched with a friend when we were in a youth hostel. We thought it’d be funny if she hid in one of the big lockers and jumped out on our friends. There she was hidden in the middle shelf locker. We were so pumped, there was so much energy and enthusiasm. When it came to the moment of surprise, in her excitement, she punched the door clean off of its hinges. So instead of this funny surprise, she was crouched in the locker looking horrified, the friends were just confused, and the broken door clattered to the ground. When I recall her face, it makes me laugh till I cry…

Readytohealnow · 06/05/2025 10:54

Sorry DH but this is hysterical hahahahaha

MoistVonL · 06/05/2025 10:53

I was that woman when I was in my twenties. A bloke pounced out at me from behind and grabbed me by the waist.

I shrieked and walloped him.

His girlfriend (wearing the same colour jacket as I was) could hardly stand she was laughing so hard. I was rather embarrassed but laughing; he was mortified - and sore!

WayneEyre · 06/05/2025 10:51

toomuchfaff · 06/05/2025 10:37

Shrines...

OP has explained it wasn't shrines. You assumed disrespect 🤣

I would imagine there was substantial religious symbolism there in an Italian fishing community. That's not to say nobody could have a little joke, it wasn't a cathedral, but also no need to dismiss totally what the statues probably were. People can have different views.

Gyozas · 06/05/2025 10:47

Nomoreidea · 06/05/2025 10:45

So did he explain to the woman he thought she was someone else? Or not? Did he say sorry at all?
She will be wondering what on earth happened.

Imagine she’s given it no thought at all. A man jumping out near some crude wooden renderings of fisherman, looking mortified and scuttling off, and then being seen in the car park with his wife…?

Nomoreidea · 06/05/2025 10:45

So did he explain to the woman he thought she was someone else? Or not? Did he say sorry at all?
She will be wondering what on earth happened.

LadyBracknellsHandbagg · 06/05/2025 10:43

Wholikesbreadandhoney · 06/05/2025 08:53

@ArtTheClown

I'm interested to know why you thought my comment was so funny.
Do you think tourist disrespecting other people's customs is amusing?
Please explain.

I bet you’re fun at parties!

nomas · 06/05/2025 10:42

Dreco · 06/05/2025 06:55

No it wasn’t religious! It was fishermen statues, made of wood.

Wasn’t Christ a fisherman of men? 🤣

LadyBracknellsHandbagg · 06/05/2025 10:41

Goodness me the thought police are out in force this morning, patrolling alongside the lack of humour police. Where did you all lose your sense of humour?!

Gyozas · 06/05/2025 10:40

This thread’s responses makes me feel like we’re being trolled. Hopefully.

Gyozas · 06/05/2025 10:39

DonnaBanana · 06/05/2025 07:54

Ignore the context, your husband basically jumped out at a random woman and terrified her, I’m not sure I could forgive that.

You’re up there with @Walkingonmoss for being brilliantly batshit OTT.

hamstersarse · 06/05/2025 10:38

I dread encountering the poe-faced posters on this thread in real life - every little tiny thing is an opportunity to be offended and triggered

The anxiety and depression drugs just don't seem to work

It's hilarious OP - I'd still be laughing at DP now about it, maybe even for months

LadyBracknellsHandbagg · 06/05/2025 10:37

Greenartywitch · 06/05/2025 08:34

He is lucky the woman did not report him as a pervert trying to scare off lone women...or that she did not react by slapping him around the face.

Not remotely funny and it is even more of a fool for trying to blame you for his nonsense.

Chill out for goodness sake! It was a genuine mistake, stop catastrophising.