Worried I’m about to move in with a cocklodger

Do you both work?

Are you the higher earner?

Do you own more nice household things than he does?

Is there an age difference? (30s can have have a ten year difference)

🤮- he’s telling you his standards please run fast

I'm sure you can hold off buying somewhere together til you're more sure of the situation between you.
Definitely try before you buy into a life with him.
No matter how young or old you are, you have plenty of time to check out the goods on offer.
If his offer doesn't suit your needs, there are plenty of other suitors out there waiting to impress you. Don't be desperate & naive.

And you're buying without having lived together??

No!!!

He wants to get out from home and you're the easiest way.

Don't do it!

Fuck me. He literally wants you to kiss his ass for generously helping around the house?

Hideous.

You know what you need to do. 18 months is no time at all. Do better.

They probably weren't compatible because she wouldn't put up with his crap. It's your decision whether you put up with it but he is giving you fair warning now that it's going to be a rough ride. Personally I would thank him for the warning and wouldn't see him anymore.

Agree, a year rental with a six month break clause. You'll go after 6 months.

At the very least you need to live together for several rmonths before you think about buying property. Long enough for all the routine, boring, cleaning jobs to need doing. Long enough for you both to think of him as living there and not just visiting. I'd probably cut my losses now tbh.

This is one of those posts you hope aren't real.

OP: I am planning on buying a house with my boyfriend of 18 months. He just told me he wasn't great on housework but with his ex he would occasionally clean the kitchen/bathrooms in exchange for rimming. Should I be worried?

Any normal woman with normal boundaries would be fleeing - not worrying.

Dump him.

nopity nope nope. You are just imagining this man will of course be able to cook, even though he ‘wasn’t comfortable’ doing it at yours, and he lives with mummy and daddy and he’s made comments like this about the housework?? You’d be crazy to continue the plan to buy. Conversations are hard, but having to split and sell the house is harder.

😆

Bum-holey!

😂

.

Personally I would have The Ick big time by now. But if you are still considering him as a long term partner, you definitely need to live together first. After all you may be ‘everything he wants’ but is he everything that YOU want?

I could understand if he didn’t want to give up a house or flat to move in with you, but he lives with his parents for goodness sake.

I expect his mum does everything for him & he doesn’t want you to realise this until you’ve made the commitment of buying a house together.

Absolutely don’t do this. Buying with someone you’ve never even lived with is madness.

I think we know why he and former GF 'weren't compatible' . She wised up and kicked him out didn't she? Let him remain his parents problem; they should have trained him better. I bet they're desperate to get him out too; hence the rush.

I agree with your decision that this doesn't sound like a good idea after all, at least not yet.

First, it seems like you should know him better than you do by now. I read a lot of "I don't knows" in your replies about him on basic knowledge about someone. If he's not forthcoming about his past, one wonders why.

Second, I agree with you that his comments are letting you know what he expects. Living with a man baby who doesn't do his fair share sounds very draining. Dumping all the household tasks on her also shows a deep lack of regard for his partner's comfort and wellbeing in general. Apparently, he's learned nothing from his last relationship except to go home to mommy. In fact, it sounds like he thinks that kind of lazy misogyny is cute.

Also, as has been mentioned, buying a house with someone you're not married to can turn into a giant mess if it doesn't work out. And if you're not yet at a stage to make a commitment to each other, why add the complication of committing to homeownership together. House prices go up and down but they're far from the only issue. It sounds like this guy might not even be a solid bet to sign a year long lease with. Slowing down for now sounds like a good idea to me.

I meant that’s what the ops DH does 😂

Omg 😳 is he for real??
do you really to think about it, are you happy to be his skivvy and agree to sexual favors for him to do a tiny % of his share

Every day I think to myself " there can't be worse out there. " but no, it appears they're still competeting for the scumbag of the year.

This!! I bought a house with a man after a 4 and a half year relationship, most of which we lived together for and that STILL definitely wasn’t long enough for me to realise what a twat he was, and I was then stuck in a mortgage with him! Please reconsidering buying with someone after just 18 months, especially if he’s already making comments like that.

don't you mean holey @BonfireToffee ?

So sorry... got ma coat

He's telling you who he is.

Listen to him.

1000x this, OP. Sack him off, for the love of all that is holy.

@londongirl12

"and he does the drying up"

Did you have to reward him? 🙈

This. ^ Any man expecting a 'rimjob' can get in the bin.