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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not want to 'celebrate' VE

236 replies

Ramblethroughthebrambles · 05/05/2025 17:33

I've been asked to take part in VE celebrations this week. I've politely declined. It feels OK to me to join in a solemn commemoration, with a focus on how to make sure this never happens again, but not a celebration of victory which all the UK events seem to be. I'm grateful for the sacrifices so many soldiers and others made and that we didn't become part of the Nazi empire. I completely get why people originally celebrated the end of such an awful war and its hardships. But celebrating military victory 80 years on doesn't sit right with me, especially given the conflicts in the world today. It seems to normalise military intervention and sends the message that military victory is a 'good thing' when often it's a result of failures in international diplomacy/ strategy / long term thinking. I'm not a complete pacifist and recognise there are times when military intervention is a necessary evil. But that doesn't make me want to celebrate it.

I never hear anyone else expressing this view in public. There seems to be an expectation that we'll all want to get the bunting out and have a tea party. So AIBU?

OP posts:
Dangermoo · 05/05/2025 19:06

DrMonjo · 05/05/2025 19:04

I was heavily involved with VE50 in 1995! It was a very different tone. Many people in the their 70s & 80s talking for the first time about their war experiences. It balanced the joyful photos of Trafalgar Square. Lots of just went to work like normal at the canteen/hospital/war office/Bletchley Park type places.
Lots of remembrance that VJ was a long way off and that most people didn't necessarily know where or when people would return from overseas.
Lots of acknowledgement and fear about how Europe would be rebuilt and how to stop another world war happening again, rather than repeating the mistakes of WW1.
Each decade further away from any conflict just seems to simplify it and we get the rhetoric of the decade. I personally dislike 'hero' talk for conscripted men. They used to talk more humble, of duty, of doing the right thing, being traumatised or even youthful adventure and excitement. The hero word was never used and I don't think accurate to those I spoke to.

Very poignant 😔

GetMeOutOfHere20 · 05/05/2025 19:05

BallerinaRadio · 05/05/2025 17:47

It's hard to look around the state that the country is in and think that much is worth celebrating. All these 'celebrations' are meaningless, a better legacy for the men and women that died would be a safe country with happy healthy people not the swathes of poverty and selfishness and hatred we see now.

It’d be a whole whole lot worse if the Nazis won

BadAmbassador · 05/05/2025 19:04

I don’t see it at glorification of war, very far from it. More like remembering to remember the horror - and the huge sacrifices made by all kinds of people, not just those who fought but those who endured the hardships and privations. I think it matters to keep it in people’s minds, especially for each new generation. Looking at footage of the time, it’s just unthinkable, unimaginable stuff that people just dealt with every day for six years!

DrMonjo · 05/05/2025 19:04

I was heavily involved with VE50 in 1995! It was a very different tone. Many people in the their 70s & 80s talking for the first time about their war experiences. It balanced the joyful photos of Trafalgar Square. Lots of just went to work like normal at the canteen/hospital/war office/Bletchley Park type places.
Lots of remembrance that VJ was a long way off and that most people didn't necessarily know where or when people would return from overseas.
Lots of acknowledgement and fear about how Europe would be rebuilt and how to stop another world war happening again, rather than repeating the mistakes of WW1.
Each decade further away from any conflict just seems to simplify it and we get the rhetoric of the decade. I personally dislike 'hero' talk for conscripted men. They used to talk more humble, of duty, of doing the right thing, being traumatised or even youthful adventure and excitement. The hero word was never used and I don't think accurate to those I spoke to.

Dangermoo · 05/05/2025 19:01

CombatBarbie · 05/05/2025 18:55

I've never heard Remembrance being referred to as Poppy Day?

Me neither. Remembrance Sunday will also never lose its meaning.

Dangermoo · 05/05/2025 18:59

zzpleb · 05/05/2025 18:52

Despite the word "Victory" I always assumed it was based on the celebration of peace being declared and the relief that the war (in Europe at least) was over.

I don't know if it was as much "hurray we won" rather than "thank God it's ended and we didn't lose".

I've never had a sense that WW2 is glorified - perhaps because I grew up hearing first-hand accounts from family and that makes it more personal.

You have summed up how I feel about it. I remember my mum telling me of them being kids and hiding in hedges during bombing. I can't even begin to imagine the terror. The relief for this country when it was all over, must have been tremendous. I like to pay my respect to our fallen, as well as raise a glass to victory.

CaptainFuture · 05/05/2025 18:58

Do all the 'oh mer gawd.. this was ages ago.... why are you still going on about this...?!!'
Do you say the same when people talk about racism and apartheid? 'This was ages ago! Why are you still going on'?!

CombatBarbie · 05/05/2025 18:55

Lilyhatesjaz · 05/05/2025 17:43

I am totally with you op.
When remembrance Sunday started to be called poppy day I felt we had lost the true meaning and purpose.

I've never heard Remembrance being referred to as Poppy Day?

CombatBarbie · 05/05/2025 18:54

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

zzpleb · 05/05/2025 18:52

Despite the word "Victory" I always assumed it was based on the celebration of peace being declared and the relief that the war (in Europe at least) was over.

I don't know if it was as much "hurray we won" rather than "thank God it's ended and we didn't lose".

I've never had a sense that WW2 is glorified - perhaps because I grew up hearing first-hand accounts from family and that makes it more personal.

Dangermoo · 05/05/2025 18:51

BarneyRonson · 05/05/2025 18:49

I’m immensely grateful that we didn’t get a nazi victory here, my mother would have never met my father, or she might not have been allowed to live. I am so grateful for how this nation stood firm for its beliefs against evil. I’ll celebrate.

Thank you for sharing that x 🙏

Feelingmuchbetter · 05/05/2025 18:50

You sound like a typically ungrateful leftie unable to grasp your own privilege, and the sacrifices made to give you the freedom to post your thoughts in English today on a forum.

How do you think things would have turned out without the victory??

BarneyRonson · 05/05/2025 18:49

I’m immensely grateful that we didn’t get a nazi victory here, my mother would have never met my father, or she might not have been allowed to live. I am so grateful for how this nation stood firm for its beliefs against evil. I’ll celebrate.

WinterMorn · 05/05/2025 18:47

ThePunnyPeachDuck · 05/05/2025 18:47

Well she wouldn’t give him the time of day if he was Charles the self serve supervisor would she.

Everyone addressing her as “the Queen” as well need to give their head a wobble.

Seriously, stop trying to derail the thread.

Dangermoo · 05/05/2025 18:47

ThePunnyPeachDuck · 05/05/2025 18:40

Bloody Ross Kemp now on TV saying it was a good day out .

And?

ThePunnyPeachDuck · 05/05/2025 18:47

CaptainFuture · 05/05/2025 18:44

'That tart'?!

Well she wouldn’t give him the time of day if he was Charles the self serve supervisor would she.

Everyone addressing her as “the Queen” as well need to give their head a wobble.

Dangermoo · 05/05/2025 18:46

It's not for anybody else to tell you ŵhether you are being unreasonable. I shall be celebrating it because it is and always will be a significant event - to me.

CaptainFuture · 05/05/2025 18:44

ThePunnyPeachDuck · 05/05/2025 18:23

My issue is that all the coverage was mainly about the Royals and that tart Camilla .

Would of been good to see some actual footage of VE Day, more of the veterans and events around the Country

'That tart'?!

tuvamoodyson · 05/05/2025 18:42

Then don’t OP.

EmmaJane2025 · 05/05/2025 18:41

🙄🤦🏼‍♀️

Serpentstooth · 05/05/2025 18:41

It is a celebration of the courage and sacrifice of those who fought and died that we may live and is a public recognition of thanks rather than a Trumpish 'we won, suck it up losers' statement. So YABU.

ThePunnyPeachDuck · 05/05/2025 18:40

Bloody Ross Kemp now on TV saying it was a good day out .

MelliC · 05/05/2025 18:40

As the daughter of a German Jew who came to the UK as a refugee in 1939, I think there is plenty to celebrate. Why not wave a few flags?

CSectionUncertainty · 05/05/2025 18:38

I think it’s pretty ironic that Starmer and co were front and centre of the celebrations today, whilst continuing to vote to support the genocide in the Middle East. We clearly haven’t learnt anything from the past and I also think it’s pretty crass to celebrate the UK as some sort of heroes on the “right” side of history, while we’re literally funding the bombing of innocent civilians, including babies, children, healthcare workers and journalists in at least a couple of other countries as we speak.

I do think it’s right and important that the living veterans themselves are commemorated and commended though - we do all owe them a great debt.

WinterMorn · 05/05/2025 18:35

waltzingparrot · 05/05/2025 18:32

I see it as celebrating that good triumphed over evil. War is awful so bringing it to an end and saving lives that would otherwise be lost can only be something to celebrate.

But evil is seriously threatening good again on more than one front. I wonder how many of the people attending The Mall today care about anything other than the chance to see some Royals and have a day out?

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