How do people vanish?

I often think about this. Years ago it was easier. I remember even back in the late 90s I moved to a new town, got a job, rented a flat directly from the landlady through the small ads in the paper and never had to show any ID.

But you hear about it now in cases where they are tracking criminals that they moved to another town and changed their name. How can that happen now?

@Where2GoNexthe has never spoken about it (he has never really spoken much to me about anything) but has never been able to maintain a healthy relationship (apart from with my Mum).

Change gender. You can get ID in your new name and gender, even the NHS will change your records for you. And it's transphobic for anyone to out you if they happen to realise so no one will. Even if you commit a crime the police will say they're looking for a man when you're a woman. That's the only way I can think of, these days.

I found out recently that of someone is flagged as missing their passport and put on an international will trigger an alert when they pass a border in some countries eg EU.

Police will get info that they've passed a particular border, so they can tell that the person is alive, and it can be used to help to identify unidentified bodies.

Seems we all have a right to disappear, as long as nothing criminal. I do think that families should be told that the person is alive, so they don't have to live with the awful uncertainty of not knowing.

Before DC I used to sometimes daydream about just leaving everything, work, family, all my obligations and starting again with a new identity somewhere totally different, but I don't understand people who actually do this to their family and friends.

It depends what you are vanishing FROM. If it's just your family/friends then it would be easy. Move to a completely different place in Britain/Ireland. Change your name (entirely legal). Get new bank accounts etc in your new name. Come off all social media, change your phone number, never have contact with anyone from your old life. If you are reported missing and the police find you, you tell the police that you're absolutely fine and do not want anything reported to the people who have reported you missing and the police respect that, all the people will be told is that you are OK, they will have no idea where you are, what name you are going by and what you are doing.

Living under the radar without any bank accounts etc is a whole other matter and I would imagine many people who have intentionally disappeared will have used the first method although their family/friends will be unaware of that.

Like in The Day of the Jackal!

But that worked because they were all paper records, not routinely cross checked and, as in the book, just put in a drawer and forgotten about.

Now I think you'd need to find someone about your age who died recently but the death was not registered.

This wouldn't help you anymore. If you tried to do anything with that birth certificate that involved a Govt. agency there are integrated systems that would raise a red flag via an automated GRO death record cross check.

My ex vanished

He came round to see our ds,walked to the end of the street,waved,walked around the corner and vanished

He's known for disappearing for 18 months or so-he'd disappear and pop back up a year or so later acting like he'd seen you the week before

First I knew he'd disappeared,was someone shared his photo on a missing person page on fb

I'd seen him 8 years earlier and his family where claiming they hadn't seen him for over 11 years (he claimed he was moving to Essex for a while and would be in touch-he didn't bother,so I figured he'd pop back up at some point)

He works cash in hand,has blocked us on sm sites,never spends more than a week in one place and I'm guessing he's gone back to using his middle name and mother's maiden name to anyone who meets him

I'm guessing he uses the nhs but doesn't claim the dole,doesn't rent (his 'work' provide him with a room) and changes his appearance all the time

If the police looked into this properly,they'd find him but they don't really care

He has psychopathic traits and won't give us a thought,his family seem to think he's dead but he won't be

He just got bored and 'forgot' about us

I forget which v show - I think Long Lost Family - featured a parent who left the family home c50 years ago and the child was looking for them. Records showed they had moved about 15 miles away and had a second family under their same name but the original family was never aware they were so close. It would be much harder to do that now as everything / everyone is so traceable electronically.

That's so sad, your poor Dad. How does he feel about her disappearing?

It would be incredibly hard to do now, because we no longer live in a cash economy, everything is computerised and therefore it's much easier to find someone. There is also CCTV absolutely everywhere, particularly in the UK, so you'd need to disguise your appearance, change your name, only work cash in hand, etc.

I would start by ordering er a birth certificate for someone who had died who would be the same age as me.

It is difficult these days but years ago, as people have said, it was much easier.

People used to to find a headstone of a child who would be about the same age as them and apply for I'd in their now new name. I'm not sure if that would work these days.

I often think about this scenario..not in a negative way but out of curiosity and 'how'.
I'd imagine you'd need quite a bit of secret cash stashed away and then access to someone who could do you some counterfeit documents as otherwise everything you use is tracked back to you from card transactions, ANPR on your vehicle reg, some police forces even have facial recognition equipment.

Maybe if you used legit passport to get to continental Europe you could move more freely or go somewhere with your cash where you can pay to disappear...south America maybe.

My grandmother vanished when my Dad was little. I think he was four. Never saw or heard from her again. That was in the 50s.

I would say it is easy to cut yourself off from family and friends. All you would need is a new address/phone number.

Harder to be invisible to government, banks, NHS...I assume the only way would be a fake identity, move to a different country or live completely off the grid.

Cash in hand illegal working and perhaps a partner to support. Fine as long as you're in good health, I guess.

Someone I knew well, disappeared for a year he went on holiday and it was his employer that reported him missing.

He was a frequent solo traveller and wild camped so nobody noticed he hadn' been around . He was eventually found and he had some MH issues that he hid from people he spent some time in hospital, it was a over a decade ago I don't know how he managed it.

I don’t think you could, really. I guess the only way would be to get hold of a false identity somehow, either by using a fake passport or driving license or by using someone else’s.

You could do it if you had a secret wealthy partner who could support you.

I think you could do it from your family but a bit more difficult if the police were actually minded to look for you.

60 years ago it must have been a lot easier, with passport, id etc.
She was not able to take her kids though if I understand correctly. Which is an enormous sacrifice then and now.
But women had no voice back then, she probably had no other choice, die or flee.
Poor woman. And truckloads others in the same boat I presume.