Karma has finally happened

I think no one here actually understands what karma is. It’s a Buddhist term which you have all hijacked. It has a much deeper meaning than you have all simplistically ascribed to it.

So you actually think animal cruelty is worse than cruelty to women? Did you read the bit where he was abusive and she needed a restraining order?

Writing what you did is cruel. You are obviously one of those awful types who would beat someone to death with a ‘Be Kind’ placards.

You have said "Maybe using the term karma was wrong but he never faced any consequences of his actions until now." other than getting cancer what consequences has he faced?

Get a grip and stop twisting things.

I'm very glad he hasn't skipped off into the sunset. Implying those with cancer have received it as some sort of karmic payback for their behaviour is a bit shit though.

No it’s not weird. The OP can do something about it, walk away, report it, get therapy. Animals cannot defend themselves and nor can they seek therapy or solace in others.

How is having cancer facing anything other than having cancer?

I cordially disagree. It is completely within the ordinary spectrum of reactions for a well-adjusted human being. It appeals to the entirely ordinary human desire for justice.

You don't need to pathologise the OP because her reactions differ from yours.

Whatever you call it, it's a very direct consequence of his actions (messing up his body by repeatedly and deliberately taking quantities of drugs). And it's something he did to try to hurt you which had actually ended up hurting himself in the long run.

If people have a problem with 'karma', try out 'poetic justice' for size, which is what I'd call it. It's completely self-inflicted harm arising from a nasty impulse to control and manipulate another person.

You don't need to berate yourself for your feelings, OP. They are completely natural and fine to have. But the PP cautioning against carrying hate or too much vicious glee around with you are also right in that it only ends up taking up too much of your headspace and poisoning your current life.

Think of it as - natural consequences have taken care of his actions without you having to life a finger, leaving you free to let it go and mentally leave him and his shit behind you.

All the best.

So what have children done to deserve bad things happening to them, this thread is an issue but I suppose free country and all that, but going by your thinking what karma will get you for thinking this and for the things you have done in your own life?

I’m really pleased you’ve been able to leave and move on from an awful abusive relationship. I’ve two thoughts on kharma:

1. the best revenge is living well
2. worry about your own kharma (this was said to me by a friend when I was feeling vitriolic about someone’s situation. They meant, ‘give a shit about their life - concentrate on your own’. I thought it to be very good advice).

Live well OP!

So it is ok to abuse humans (physically and mentally) - especially someone who you are supposed to love but not ok to abuse animals?! Sorry but did you read the OP?

OP, I wouldn’t wish cancer on anyone. I think you should get some therapy or something because this is not a normal reaction for a well-adjusted human.

I had an abusive stepdad. When he got really unwell years later (mostly as a result of alcoholism) and eventually died, my reaction wasn’t to celebrate it. My feelings were complex but I mainly thought “what a shame he was so unhappy he had to behave like that.”

You can be extremely glad to be out of a situation and never wish to see the person again, hell even hate them if you like. But being glad they get cancer? I can’t fathom it.

Well, there's quietly sarisfied,mthenbthere's gloating about someone having cancer.
Yes, it seems like the OP was with a shite on a stick, but even if she was pleased he got 'his come-uppance', gloating about it on a public forum serves no purpose and only makes the gloater look petty.
A dignified silence would be more effective

If it was a post using his real name on the facebook community board in the small village he lives then I agree. But not when it is all anonymous on a global forum

People aren't MINIMISING animal cruelty. They're simply saying, in response to a very strange post, that it's not WORSE than human cruelty.

What's the matter with you?

I hope, OP, that you can resist gloating and celebrating - not a good look. But, I don't for one second blame you for getting a certain amount of satisfaction that some sort of "justice" might be getting served on someone who has abused you physically (and presumably mentally and emotionally).

Try not to revel, try to forget about him, but don't feel guilty for feeling some sense of justice.

OP if you’d titled your post “Have just found out that my ex possibly has cancer,” and had gone on to explain the details but without the mention of the word Karma, the majority response would have been “couldn’t have happened to a nicer bloke.”

I don’t believe in Karma, but I do believe that every single person on this thread has heard of something bad happening to a bad person and has either thought the above or has actually felt nothing.

Or have you all felt sympathy for Fred West/Harold Shipman/other people outside who have come to harm in some way but who you know as having done harm to others?

Actually I’d go so far as to say that any of the virtue signallers on this thread who may have said anything in your ex’s favour if the K word hadn’t been mentioned would have been given short shrift.

We all without exception, know someone or know of someone who has done something despicable.

There are world leaders who are responsible for atrocities in others and their own countries.

Notorious murderers who have committed the most heinous crimes.

If any of those people were to come to harm the majority response would be a positive one.

When Fred west and Harold Shipman killed themselves the only sympathy I felt was for their victims who now knew that the bastards had taken the cowards way out. But I am glad they’re dead. And I’ve subsequently read that many of Shipman’s victims now feel the same.

I know at least two people who I wouldn’t give CPR to if necessary. And based on what they’ve done (talking serious child abuse resulting in life-long disabilities) I would feel no remorse.

I wouldn’t wish harm or death on someone, but thinking that it’s not a bad thing when that happens isn’t the same. It’s not you doing it.

If the bastard has fucked up his insides by playing mock suicide then he deserves what he gets. Ditto if said stupidity has led to him having cancer.

What?? Animal cruelty is dreadful but human cruelty and domestic violence is fine in your book??

You are getting feelings mixed up with behaviour. Someone can’t help how they feel. Feelings are our way of communicating with ourselves, feeling happy about a ex-abusive partner being ill is not about cruelty—it’s often about unresolved trauma and a sense of justice or power being restored after feeling helpless or harmed.

Yawn 🥱

it’s one thing to be happy that karma has struck, it’s another to start an online post celebrating it.

if you can’t see the difference here then I don’t really know how I can help you.

please stop replying to me, I cannot be bothered anymore

I’m using your standards. He’s the violent criminal, she’s the woman who can’t help feeling a moments satisfaction at his poor health, I note you don’t mention the long term issues caused by his taking pills to look like he’s committing suicide when she left him, just the cancer. If those two are as bad as each other then what are you as bad as? No bank holiday here actually.

Finally a sane response.