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AIBU?

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Original poster

DH said he's leaving because I'm having another drink

204 replies

Swimswimmswimswimswim · 04/05/2025 18:01

I have just hosted all my in laws 8 adults and more children, including my own 4 under 5! Full roast dinner, made it, cooked it, cleaned it, cleaned entire house before and looked after everyone. No one else did anything really other than DH carving the meat. I have filled everyone's drinks ho5 and cold. Fed dn a snack by hand. Bf one of my dc and now after they have left I have opened another bottle of wine and said this one is mine. DH has said if I drink it he is leaving. Aibu to tell him to crack on as I have had enough!

OP posts:
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CarpetKnees · 06/05/2025 15:45

"hounded by sanctimonious people"

^ bit of an odd interpretation of people answering the question the OP chose to ask Hmm

BunnyLake · 06/05/2025 09:40

CalicoPusscat · 05/05/2025 23:57

OP probably had enough of the responses and scarpered. It's not much fun getting hounded by sanctimonious people as they sit there with their gin.

They didn’t have to post in the first place if they didn’t want responses.

BunnyLake · 06/05/2025 09:39

SummerIce · 05/05/2025 17:39

MNHQ have actually told you she’s not the same as the previous poster?

I’d be genuinely amazed. I can imagine they would confirm it’s a genuine poster. But genuinely amazed they went on to say it’s a different poster. Wow.

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Maybe it’s true that we all have another us living a parallel life.

CalicoPusscat · 05/05/2025 23:57

OP probably had enough of the responses and scarpered. It's not much fun getting hounded by sanctimonious people as they sit there with their gin.

CarpetKnees · 05/05/2025 23:50

FieldInWhichFucksAreGrownIsBarren · 05/05/2025 19:08

Well the judgey pearl clutchers were out in force for this one weren't they... 🙄

The OP asked if she was being unreasonable.

People have answered, giving the opinions, as she asked.

Not sure that is 'judgy' - it is answering the question asked.

This is AIBU, not a topic area where you can only answer if you think the OP is faultless and to be agreed with whatever information they give.

FieldInWhichFucksAreGrownIsBarren · 05/05/2025 19:08

Well the judgey pearl clutchers were out in force for this one weren't they... 🙄

IrritatedEarthling · 05/05/2025 18:53

SummerIce · 05/05/2025 17:39

MNHQ have actually told you she’s not the same as the previous poster?

I’d be genuinely amazed. I can imagine they would confirm it’s a genuine poster. But genuinely amazed they went on to say it’s a different poster. Wow.

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I'm not sure I follow what you're saying.

SummerIce · 05/05/2025 17:39

IrritatedEarthling · 05/05/2025 13:20

MNHQ have confirmed that this lady is genuine, and is not the same as the recent thread, and I'm happy with that.

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MNHQ have actually told you she’s not the same as the previous poster?

I’d be genuinely amazed. I can imagine they would confirm it’s a genuine poster. But genuinely amazed they went on to say it’s a different poster. Wow.

Supergirl1958 · 05/05/2025 15:43

IrritatedEarthling · 05/05/2025 13:20

MNHQ have confirmed that this lady is genuine, and is not the same as the recent thread, and I'm happy with that.

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Excellent! Now people can stop wrongfully accusing her!

Riaanna · 05/05/2025 14:50

Tandora · 05/05/2025 12:22

You have no idea if OP has a problem with drinking. You have just assumed. So yes, I call that judgemental- quite literally leaping to a judgement.

Edited
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look at what we do know.

OH said leaving because having another drink. So already been drinking.
Has taken an entire bottle of wine.
Stated not sharing.
Is breast feeding.

Clues are all there.

IrritatedEarthling · 05/05/2025 13:20

IrritatedEarthling · 05/05/2025 07:44

I've asked mnhq to compare the two threads and check whether it's a repeat poster.

MNHQ have confirmed that this lady is genuine, and is not the same as the recent thread, and I'm happy with that.

Tandora · 05/05/2025 12:22

SquashedMallow · 05/05/2025 09:32

Wow... Did you actually read my post? I think there's little chance of an ex problem drinker (me) judging another one ! We do tend to know how the script goes when we're in denial, however. You think you're helping here, but your advice is detrimental.

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You have no idea if OP has a problem with drinking. You have just assumed. So yes, I call that judgemental- quite literally leaping to a judgement.

IrritatedEarthling · 05/05/2025 12:06

SummerIce · 05/05/2025 08:34

As much as I agree it’s the same poster, that’s extreme and unwarranted. MNHQ are not going to invade someone’s privacy to reassure you that it’s the same person.

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I've been accused of reposting similar myself, and it derails the thread, people accusing you of being a troll. What's more is I'm seeing it on every thread I read, "you've posted this before". If MNHQ can say that that isn't the case here, the thread can continue. It isn't an invasion of privacy to check an ip address. They do it all the time looking for PBPs.

AngelicKaty · 05/05/2025 11:11

wrinklyoldarms · 05/05/2025 08:08

Gawd what's the matter with folks here?

It was said as a JOKE I assume and an expression of her frustration.

Get a grip.

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Yes, you "assume" OP said it as a "joke", but where in her posts does she say this? Clue: she doesn't.

BunnyLake · 05/05/2025 10:15

It’s strange that this thread is almost identical to the other one’s scenario - cooking dinner for in laws etc (never mind the same children count). What is it about near identical threads (or identical) coming up more than once but with different dates? I don’t know enough about the workings of MN to know why.

Riaanna · 05/05/2025 10:00

Blackluxe · 05/05/2025 09:36

This, exactly.

I notice Op has barely been back to answer any questions. We are definitely not getting the full picture here and her reluctance to give more details combined with what she has said leads me to suspect there is a drink problem.

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She drank the bottle. Of course she’s gone.

MightAsWellBeGretel · 05/05/2025 09:42

PiggyPigalle · 04/05/2025 22:41

"That's too much wine to drink." OP hasn't said how much was involved.

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I'm guessing they were talking about the whole bottle she was planning on sinking solo?

BunnyLake · 05/05/2025 09:39

Swimswimmswimswimswim · 04/05/2025 19:45

So to answer a questions. I'm.not.AI and I'm not the same one from before. I know all about breastfeeding and drinking so it's ok. I need to learn to ask for help

Help with the cooking or help with your drink problem?

Supergirl1958 · 05/05/2025 09:38

BunnyLake · 05/05/2025 09:37

Must be their twin.

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Of course! 🙄

BunnyLake · 05/05/2025 09:37

Supergirl1958 · 05/05/2025 07:30

OP has been back to say that post wasn’t them!

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Must be their twin.

Blackluxe · 05/05/2025 09:36

Riaanna · 04/05/2025 19:54

Honestly drinking a whole bottle of wine in anger whilst breast feeding is a drink problem whether you want to admit it or not.

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This, exactly.

I notice Op has barely been back to answer any questions. We are definitely not getting the full picture here and her reluctance to give more details combined with what she has said leads me to suspect there is a drink problem.

Blackluxe · 05/05/2025 09:34

LoveWine123 · 04/05/2025 18:09

You have posted this before. And it transpired you indeed have a problem with alcohol.

Yeah this sounds familiar to me

SquashedMallow · 05/05/2025 09:32

Tandora · 05/05/2025 07:47

If “D”H wants to help his wife and his children, perhaps he could start by lifting a finger to help with cooking/ cleaning/ family responsibilities. But I’m sure that all went right over your head when you saw an opportunity to judge an exhausted woman.

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Wow... Did you actually read my post? I think there's little chance of an ex problem drinker (me) judging another one ! We do tend to know how the script goes when we're in denial, however. You think you're helping here, but your advice is detrimental.

ThatMorningCoffeeBrewedItForYa · 05/05/2025 09:01

MercuryRisingBeware · 05/05/2025 01:09

Tell him to fuck off. Have at it.

Jesus Christ

LAMPS1 · 05/05/2025 08:46

Swimswimmswimswimswim · 04/05/2025 19:45

So to answer a questions. I'm.not.AI and I'm not the same one from before. I know all about breastfeeding and drinking so it's ok. I need to learn to ask for help

Having a hard day hosting for a family event is one thing.
Rewarding yourself with a whole bottle of wine all to yourself when you have 4 children under 5 is a stupid thing to do and a bit of a give away OP.

What is your motivation for hosting and catering for 8 adults and extra children with a roast dinner all by yourself without help.
Were you coerced to do it?
Did you want to host them, -did it give you pleasure to cook and wait on their needs as well as look after your own children?

Did you do it to point score with your DH or somebody else?
Did you do it for the reward of a bottle of wine with no questions asked?