To be annoyed at staff asking my kid what she wants?

I didn’t vote, because people made some reasonable arguments.
But you’re the mum - you’re the boss. But did the ice cream vendor know that? I don’t think it matters when you were doing the ordering.
I can see why it irked you.
At 9, we were on our bikes going to the drive-in getting soft-serve cones by ourselves. Soft-serve was our only choice in our tiny town. Actually, I think it’s still the only choice back there. I love it though. I love soft-serve. It’s hard to find now where I live.
Getting back to the point (lol), maybe you should’ve just said “no flake” or “yes flake.”
I hope you had a nice day out after that.

No it's not 🤣
It's named after the 99 Flake and I can remember them being 20p.

Nothing worse than late teens, early 20s without additional needs standing there whilst a parent does the talking.

I always encourage my kids to order for themselves and am happy for staff to speak to them directly. You were standing right there and could easily have asked how much the flake would be.

It’s not as they were first noted in the 1930s -before decimalisation. I thought it was something to do with Italian conscripts as the feather in their hat resembled the flake?

Although regardless, they were probably only actually 99p for a month on 1986

I’d address a 9 year old rather than the parent, it’d be different if it was a small child.

Where on earth are you buying ice cream at that price?

Any 'captive audience' place such as a zoo; and on the seafront in some areas -down South.

I like it when people address DS - he is the one ordering something and it makes children fell engaged and important. It’s not like they asked if she wanted gold leaf!

if you couldn’t afford the flake on top then move child away from the van a little

A 99 is Mr Whippy soft ice cream which the OP doesn’t mention is what the ice cream was. The flavoured ice creams we have now are more expensive. There’s a dairy farm near us that set up an ice cream parlour. It is slightly more expensive than other ice cream but it’s handmade and is the best in the area. They change the flavours often. I’ve never had the same flavour twice. I like the try a different 1 each time with a flake btw.

Where on earth are you buying ice cream at that price? That's horrendous. It's difficult because on the one hand asking the child is nice and interactive butbit can put people in a tight spot too.

If you'd wanted a flake you'd order a 99
Maybe years ago.
The kids I work with didnt know what that was when I ordered at the ice cream parlour and took the piss out of me for ages ( good natured!)

So you tell your kid before they go to buy an icecream if they're allowed extras, or if they have a set amount to spend and must check if any offered extras are included or not.

Failure to prepare your child for normal interactions.. are on you.

Digressing. Apologies. DS (adult) told me last week that a park in B’ham it was £7.00 for a Mr Whippy. I’m not sure if it included a flake and ‘red’ sauce but either way it seemed a lot. Is that the going rate these days?
No idea as we live overseas.

It’s one thing to address the child, and something completely different to upsell TO a child. OP is complaining about the latter.

For the love of god (ignoring point of post) why don't you want your free flake? YABVU. Just think of the joy they would bring to someone else - not in the uk and have been craving a flake, so might be a little deranged by the thought of passing up free chocolate. Even if it is a cheapest of the cheap Mr Softee one.

Urgh I just went somewhere that charged 40p for a squirt of strawberry sauce on top, so I don't think you are being unreasonable at these kinds of places. Its not even the cost 40p I do have, but the principle of paying 80p for two squirts of sauce just left a bad taste in my mouth

It would be weird and patronising if they spoke to you over her head at 9 as if she wasn't there.

A 4 or 5 year old, yes, but 9 is old enough to speak for herself.

If you don't want her to have it then as a parent you simply intervene and say 'not today, thanks'.

I think they should ask whoever ordered the rest. So if your DD went with you and asked for her own ice cream, ask her (I wouldn’t say this applies to very young children). But it sounds like you’d ordered it, so they should ask you.

You ordered it in the first place so they should have asked you. If you were willing to spend the extra, you could then tell your child to tell the seller what they wanted. And to those saying it's 'only a pound' - £4 is already a lot.

If a flake was wanted it would have been asked for at the time wouldn't it

I hate the assumption that the parents can just pay for any add ons.

I last had a mr whippy two summers ago and they were £3.50 then but a fiver (regardless of if flake in it or not!). Heck if I was a parent I’d nip into closest supermarket and grab a multipack Cornettos for us all I think! 😅

That’s not true actually. I can’t remember exactly what they were named for but you can google it. I can remember when they cost less than 99p and I’m only in my 30s

yes it's nice to involve kids.

But I hate it when people say "but it's only a pound" or similar.

Yes it's only a pound. To you that may be nothing. But to a parent who has scraped together the money for an ice cream as a special treat that might be cutting into them having anything or even cutting into the grocery money for the week. The person serving won't know if this is the case or not so should never put the parent (payer) in to an awkward situation.

Not really a dig at you amooseymoomum but I've seen this too many times and it's sometimes "only a pound" and sometimes it's "only £100" or even more.

I had this was clearly one paying and had said prior I could get everyone a £4 without flakes in - teens look at me when asked and said no DH said yes which then threw money I had left out and couldn't do it a second time as planned.

So said fine we'll all get a flake but means can't buy a second lot later in week - thanks to a family funeral money was really tight.

It from £4.50 - bloody pricy already- to £5.50 per cone - and all the shops with scoops and cones in town were the same price as had checked . So we had to find some cheaper frozen ice creams to put in freezer rest of week - which took some doing as many shops were sold out but was much cheaper.

what? 😂

Do you think the flake comes out of the Mr Whippy machine straight onto the cone?