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Original poster

Friend not talking to me because I shared a photo from her Wedding

660 replies

ByTidyHare · 04/05/2025 16:53

I attended my best friends wedding a few weeks ago. The day after, I posted some photos to Instagram which were mainly of me and my DP, with one of them of myself and my friend.

This was posted in the morning and on the same afternoon, my friend messaged me to ask I took it down as she didn’t want any photos posted from the day. I said of course and removed it. Before the ceremony, there was an announcement not to upload anything to social media which I assumed related solely to the ceremony and as we were quite near the back, I didn’t take any photos of this anyway. The photo of my friend and I was taken later that evening.

My friend went on her honeymoon soon after. I learnt from another friend whilst she was away that she was really upset with me for uploading the photo and that it ruined her reveal of the day/dress with professional photos as people would have seen it on my page for the few hours it was uploaded.

I didn’t want to message my friend whilst she was still away so I waited until she returned. I apologised, said I was horrified and that I’d mis-understood the instructions thinking they only related to the ceremony.

She replied to say she was still really upset and that I took away the reveal which she’d only have one chance to do in her life and she can’t believe I ignored her wishes. I again apologised but she hasn’t spoke to me since and I’ve learnt from another friend that she doesn’t think she will forgive me.

AIBU to think my friend is now over reacting or is her reaction proportionate?

OP posts:
Philadelphiacrumpet · 05/05/2025 22:10

She sounds ridiculous and not much like a best friend anyway

beAsensible1 · 05/05/2025 22:01

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 04/05/2025 17:11

Yes it is. It's the same type of 'big event's as birth of babies, you don't put photos or announcements up when someone else has a baby, same you don't put a photo of the bride/groom until they have and announced their wedding. They even had a sign to say no photos on social media.

Lots of people don't care, but some people, like OPs friend obviously do care and it is their life event.

Show quote history

Exactly!

putting up pictures for all the world to see of someone’s wedding or baby when they have expressly asked you not to is insanely mannerless

beAsensible1 · 05/05/2025 21:55

People are getting caught up in the reason but frankly it doesn’t matter. She asked you not to show pictures of her wedding on social media and you did. Just 24 hours later.

not ok. Even if you want to scoff her being precious. So what. She asked you not to.

celticprincess · 05/05/2025 21:55

Genuinely, if I ever got married again (divorced and was married before social media existed) I would be creating an album on the platforms I use and adding friends to be able to share their photos to the album as the day unfolds. I can’t understand this precious thing where no one can see the dress. The important people are surely at the wedding and seeing it as the bride appears wearing it. The social media big reveal is for people the bride isn’t obviously that friendly either as they haven’t been invited.

Limprichteabiscuit · 05/05/2025 21:54

Blackcountrychik83 · 04/05/2025 16:58

Surely everyone who she wanted to “reveal” to were at the wedding ?!
I swear just as you think there can’t be anything else more ridiculous left to come from people , up pops another bride with a more self absorbed idea !

I fear there may be more shockers to come!

TwinklySquid · 05/05/2025 21:52

I hate to be that person but statistically, with divorce rates as they are, she’ll likely have another chance to post wedding pictures.

Shes being silly.

Lavender14 · 05/05/2025 21:48

Is she overreacting? Yes. But you were thoughtless and I can see why she's annoyed when they went to the effort of specifying no photos. There may have been others who couldn't attend she wanted to be able to show nice photos to. At the end of the day it's her wedding, she's spent the money on a good photographer and she wants to continue celebrating as she and her partner sees fit so whether or not it makes her a bridezilla is neither here nor there.

You've apologised, I'd do it again properly in person when you next see her and then there's nothing more you can do.

ilovemyhamster · 05/05/2025 21:44

A reveal? WTH. She needs to get a bit of perspective.

TatteredAndTorn · 05/05/2025 21:27

MissAndrey · 04/05/2025 16:54

She's got major Main Character Syndrome. Hopefully she'll get a bit of perspective once she's been away and realised the world continued turning.

This she’s being absolutely ludicrous. And anyone that was interested in her wedding would probably have been there so what’s a “big reveal” in her eyes means probably noting to anyone that will see her photos. And people also need to stop thinking they can tell other people what to do. All these “instructions” for guests. It’s completely self obsessed and over the top.

Fogey · 05/05/2025 21:22

Marriage is about love, not publicity. Marriage is not a marketing tool… it’s a celebration. Well done for being so excited about her wedding that you wanted to share! Your friend’s a first degree knob… ditch her and move on.

JustCopyeditorsAnnie · 05/05/2025 21:19

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Fogey · 05/05/2025 21:18

She’s not your best friend. Full stop.

FairFuming · 05/05/2025 21:13

This reminds me of when a friend of my ex and his gf were making a massive deal about not telling anyone what kind of car they were getting after making a big deal about getting a new car. Literally no one cared and it was just stupid self import behaviour.

nobodywantsit · 05/05/2025 21:13

My friend requested the same at her wedding recently. She’s honestly one of the least precious and attention seeking people I know. Very natural and down to earth and not uptight at all, she just wanted to be the first to post pictures of their wedding day.

I first heard this request years ago, it’s not unusual at all.

And to counter all the snippy comments about no-one caring about her wedding/photos, not everything thinks like this, thankfully!

Clarabell77 · 05/05/2025 21:09

How can people think they’re so important that their wedding photos require a big social media reveal. Anyone who would want to see her was likely at the wedding and anyone who wasn’t at the wedding couldn’t give much of a fuck.

I don’t think you’re being unreasonable and I’d probably not want to be friends with someone who did this to me anyway.

MyPantsAreMissing · 05/05/2025 21:02

If she had a million pound contract with a magazine, and your photo voided the contract, I could understand. If not she is being unreasonable 🙄

FlipFlopVibe · 05/05/2025 21:00

Sorry I’m not usually on the side of bridezillas but its the unwritten rule, everyone waits until the bride and groom share photos, same goes for baby arrival announcements

SummerDaysOnTheWay · 05/05/2025 20:54

She’s being a dick.
But you were asked not to share it.

Mammyplease · 05/05/2025 20:52

Surely anyone that might actually give a toss what she looked like on the day....were actually THERE ON THE DAY??!! block, delete and move on.

ShowMeTheSushi · 05/05/2025 20:52

You made a genuine mistake, apologised, and removed the photo quickly. If she wanted a strict reveal, she could’ve been clearer or even asked guests to sign an NDA. Hopefully, with time, she’ll come around.

Original poster
ByTidyHare · 05/05/2025 20:46

I’ve learnt today from another friend that some of her older family members/relatives posted photos on Facebook which she was in (the day after) and that she didn’t take issue with this because she isn’t on Facebook herself.

My ‘fault’ was that the photo was put on Instagram..

OP posts:
Trishyb10 · 05/05/2025 20:45

Precious princess, who needs friends like that, move on and ignore xx

ChocolateAddictAlways · 05/05/2025 20:45

Assuming you’ve had a good relationship up to now, her to end a friendship over a mistake like this is insanity. Okay she wanted to do a grand reveal and in her eyes that was spoiled but she needs to get over it. If she doesn’t forgive you then it’s her loss and not yours.

ladydoe · 05/05/2025 20:42

You’re better off without her in your life, she sounds flaky fake and up herself. A lucky escape for you I think

Shamsie24 · 05/05/2025 20:41

Send her this thread.