Friend not talking to me because I shared a photo from her Wedding

She is being ridiculous! She didn’t know how she looked - did she not have a mirror?? I can’t stand people like this - far too precious

Honestly she sounds like a bridezilla! You’ve apologised several times, just leave her to it now.

Really? I can't believe anybody can get worked up about this stuff. The important thing about getting married is making a success of the relationship. The wedding is trivial in the great scheme of things. I feel very fortunate to have got married long before social media existed. It was all much simpler back then.

What a stupid cow.

It’s pathetic. Fair enough she didn’t want any pics but u apologised numerous times and honestly it’s not that mental that everyone is waiting for this big reveal, so childish, none has died. And if she’s happy to lose u as her as a friend over something as silly then she wasn’t a good friend in the first place

Can’t say I’d give two hoots about the frock of someone who didn’t invite me to the wedding. Does she think she’s some sort of minor Celeb?

I wouldn’t post photos of someone else’s wedding on social media, but your friend is being ridiculous. Unless you’ve just scuppered her deal with Hello, obviously.

So did you post a picture of her in her dress before she had had chance to do it? I’m very conscious from my adult DC that posting before the bride and groom is a no no if it includes them. You are your partner and friends is ok though.

Who’s she revealing it to?

surely her nearest and dearest were there and saw it and everyone else is just your friends in SM who saw it?

meh.

I got married on a day when about half my family couldn't attend - there were a lot of reasons why it was when it was. And while this was way before social media - my loathing of having my photo taken extended to not having an official photographer and only 2 pictures of me on that day exist.

If it had been during the last few years, and i - for whatever batshit reason of my own - asked people not to upload photos, you can bet your bottom dollar that anyone who did would be eased off my christmas card list.

I, for one, am not an "SM person"

And here is the update I knew was coming.

It seems neither of you like each other. You said in your OP she’s your best friend, did you mean best friend from school or uni? It certainly doesn’t sound like you’re that close now - you weren’t in the wedding party and didn’t seem to have any input into the hen do, she never thanked you for the wedding present, you had no idea of how strongly she felt about no pictures online, she’s willing to end the friendship over this… sounds like you both wanted an out!

Surely everyone who would care about what the dress looked like would have been at the wedding, so who is the big social media reveal for? Seems like a complete overreaction

it is a very common expression - i don't watch Friends so i don't know about that, but they certainly didn't invent the expression.

You should have waited until she posted.

She shouldn’t get so uptight about the ‘reveal’. Literally nobody but her cares about her dress. I’d bet £10 that her new husband would be hard pushed to describe it beyond ‘long and white’.

You were both being unreasonable. I think she sounds bridezilla-ish but I would never post a picture of the bride* unless photos had already come out on socials and that goes twice if I'd been told not to do it.

*purely hypothetical as I don't post on instagram

Where are you getting that bride wanted guests to stop publishing photos of themselves from? There is literally nothing to suggest that guests weren't allowed to post any photos, ever, at all. She just didn't want photos of her posted until after she had. I imagine if OP had only posted the photos of herself/other friends/cute flower girl or whatever other examples you used, bride wouldn't have cared. She also wouldn't have cared (as shown by the fact all her bridesmaids did so), if OP had posted as many photos as she wanted, including of the bride and groom, after she had posted her own first.

Is it something I'd give a shit about? No. But if I like someone enough to go to their wedding, and they ask me to do something very minor that is important to them, and will have no negative impact on me at all (as it's not as if OP was a celebrity with an audience of millions clamouring for a reveal) I would do it.

Holding on a few days to post the photos would not have impacted OP in the slightest. Neither would posting the photos of herself and other friends without the one of the bride. So it would have been decent to have not done it, even if you/she thinks it's a stupid restriction. The fact that every single other attendee managed to do so suggests it really wasn't that much of an impossible demand.

Lots of things associated with weddings are a bit silly, or OTT or just not our cup of tea, or more expensive than we prefer, or whatever, but we go along with them because we (hopefully) like the people we are there to celebrate, so if it's important to them we follow their preferences.

I don't think Bride is being unreasonable to be annoyed, but is being unreasonable to not get over it given OP has given a sincere apology. People make mistakes, it's a stupid thing to lose a friendship over.

someone having a dig?
Who knows.

I do know that if i ask my friends not to do something, and it is posting pictures of someone's wedding, and they did it? i would be angry too.

I always refuse when someone says "can i put this photo of you/us online" because - and i am aware it is My Issue And I Should Get Over Myself - i loathe photos of me. any that do put photos up? i ask them to take it down. Once.
Then i report the photo to the platform.

Yes, i am that awful and petty about it, because it impacts me. Am i mad? probably. Am i petty? yes Am I pathetic about it? Probably.

But any friend who ignores this? no friend, are they?

When I got married I asked people to wait until I’d announced to post. And when I had my son I asked people to wait until I announced. And people did. It’s fairly common to do that. I’d be a bit miffed if someone choose to go against my wishes

The 'reveal'?

FFS

She sounds too immature to be married.

oh OP this makes you sound petty and wanting to annoy/upset the bride. A FRIEND of yours, fgs.

You are annoyed, so you pissed her off and did something you knew she didn't want you to do.
Bloody hell, have a bit of introspection.

Sure she's being a bit "main character". If you can't be a bit of a "main character" at your own wedding, then i don't know what the world has come to.

Before the ceremony, there was an announcement not to upload anything to social media

Sounds like the request was pretty clear. The request may or may not be reasonable, but you ignore it at your peril

Why does everything have to go on SM? OP you say you don't really do social media but you couldn't wait to put up photos of yourself. Who for? Why did they need to see them?

Why can nobody just enjoy the moment in reality anymore?

Uuurgh.

Rant over.

I sort of see where she’s coming from.
a lot of heightened emotions come into play.
She was probably really excited about putting up her photos and then op steals her thunder.
it’s bad form
yes she’s bring OTT , but she had one shot at this.
im always excited to put up wedding / baby pictures, but always check the person has got their up first (and Ask if it’s baby ones)
id give her some space ….

She’s out of order.

I will never, ever understand the way in which weddings, either their own or other people’s, turn some women from sensible reasonable people into irrational, toxic, self-obsessed, narcissistic nightmares. WTF is wrong with them?

Men get married too. Yet they don’t behave like this. I wonder why? 🤔

Dear oh dear, has the world gone mad? I'm sure her professional photos will look very nice and people will 'Like' them whether or not they've already seen the dress on a friend's SM.