Should I have left so early?

Exactly!

Again, you saying when you will be there is not agreeing a meeting time. That's you saying what suits you. Which didn't suit her, so not wasn't a time that was agreed. She then told you when she would be there. She was late from her time, but she never agrees to 10

She was 50 minutes late. She said 10.30-11. So 11 would not have been late.

The problem is partly that for some reason the OP decided to get there an hour early.

You initially said between 10.30 and 11, she messaged and said she was going to be 15 minutes late and then showed up 35 minutes after that?

Fuck that for a game of soldiers. Your time is important too, why should you be waiting around for her Majesty to grace you with her presence?

In my experience the only way to be reasonably sure at least one other person will be on time is to go to that person's house. And even then it's not guaranteed.

I mean, if you said you'd get there by 10 and she said she would be there 10:30 to 11 and you still got there for 10, there's some justification for her thinking "oh, she's not going there just to see me, she enjoys going on her own" so she's not necessarily thinking that she has to hurry because you're hanging aronud waiting. If when she said 10:30 to 11 you said "in that case I'll do some other things first and try and get there 10.45" it might have impressed on her that she had some responsibility not to keep you hanging around.
Either way though, you leaving at the time you did is fine.

How on earth were YOU rude @OneDenimQuoter ?! She was nearly an hour and a half late! Personally, I would have left when she was half an hour late.

I have friends like this. Nowadays, I only ever make arrangements to meet up with them as part of a group when I can be sure at least one person will show up at the agreed time.

simples.

That should make you come to the realisation that neither of you are true friends.

Thats not speculating that’s trying to make a decision for someone and trying to coerce their way of thinking

Ok, that’s really interesting. Thanks @BadSkiingMum.

@EmpressaurusKitty
Personally I find that about 20 minutes is the point at which driving somewhere tips from just going there into ‘a drive’.

In rural areas it’s not so much the time as the concentration that’s required, especially if you are on national speed limit roads, twisting country lanes or motorways. Then there is bad weather, road works and the dark evenings. Lots of roads are not lit outside large towns and cities!

You have to concentrate pretty hard and can pay a very high price for a lapse in concentration. I drive an hour’s round trip most days, with two options for routes. I began doing that journey four years ago and there have been six fatalities due to accidents along my routes in that time period. 😕

OP your post is unclear.

We live 35 mins from each other so I suggested to meet at a country type park. It opens at 10. She said she would get there for 10.30-11. She messaged on the day and said she would get there at 11.15. eventually see her at 11.50

Did you et there at 10? Did you tell her you'd be arriving at 10 or did she say she would be there for 10:30-11 and you said okay as if you'd arrive around the same time. If so I'd be surprised if you left at 12:35 without saying.

Did your friend seem surprised you were leaving?

Huh?!?
Saying something is evident isn’t speculating, you're stating that it’s clear or obvious

I think it's fine. You both have young kids and sometimes have to adapt to suit them. You had an hour together and she could stay longer with her kids if she wanted.

I find this confusing. She told you she’d be there 10.30-11. So why did you get there for 10? Even before she was late, you’d have potentially been there for an hour before she would turn up??

It sounds like you wanted her to fit in with your timings and you turned up very early.

If you’d turned up when she said she would (so around 11). Then you’d have been waiting 50 minutes for her which is annoying but not as bad as nearly 2 hours (this is your own doing).

She should have been more punctual but you don’t sound flexible either. At no point did she say she’d be there at 10…

So when she turned up, she hadn't set off by the time she was meant to actually be there... 11.15 to 11.50 and you live 35 mins from each other. She could have text you as she was leaving, she doesn't respect your time, why should you feel bad about leaving?

However, you can't be friends with someone you're jealous of. It seems you resent her because her life is so "perfect" and yours isn't. In your mind anyway. I'm 100% on my own with 4 kids so I get how tough it is, I really do. But projecting your unhappiness onto others isn't the way to go OP.

Eh, I don't get this at all! Where has the OP said she's unhappy with her life or jealous of her 'friend's'? She's only pointed out that she has to be more on the ball and that her friend doesn't have much excuse as she has more support - how does that translate to jealousy?!

It sounds like this is the last straw and the friend is generally selfish and thoughless.

That’s what’s confusing me. OK, I live in London & don’t drive so I get most places on foot or public transport, & I don’t have kids - maybe those are the differences. But I’d think nothing of travelling 35 mins to meet a friend for coffee or lunch.

Why is driving 35 mins such a big deal? Is it because of the kids?

It’s rude to not specify a time and just say “oh I’ll aim for..” when you said you’d be there at 10! She made it sound like she’d be there by 11 so 11.50 is taking the piss.

she clearly doesn’t value other people’s time whatsoever, so don’t you be feeling bad!!

And your point is?

Arh, well sod her then! She cant always have everything on her own terms and people aren't always willing or able to wait around.

If she cant see that, then that's a her problem!