To think son’s school should be making special allowances for his ADHD

He needs an ECHP (do a parental request) or at the very least a detailed SEN plan with reasonable adjustments in it.
Email the school with what you think he needs (including re pen license) the school have a legal requirement to consider them. This will also help you gather the evidence needed for an EHCP
There is lots of info online for guidance
https://educationhub.blog.gov.uk/2023/04/what-are-reasonable-adjustments-and-how-do-they-help-disabled-pupils-at-school/

My DD has ADHD & ASD and some days getting her to take her meds is impossible.

You are foolish. If this lad won't take medication for his condition, then he will expect to be able to make the decision for any medication.

God forbid he becomes seriously ill and refuses treatment-she has set the precedent for him to choose,

I get that it's difficult for you to understand but I can't make it any clearer @SomethingInnocuousForNow so I shall leave you in your Sunday morning confusion.

Don't bother replying to me-I only spend so much time trying to help and don't batter my head against a brick wall.

Anonymity you seem determined to see something that isn't there. In this case the child did not cause issues with others really as the others just got on with their work. I spoke with the child and tried to help them. My point is that they couldn't learn. Their brain would not allow them to. I felt very sorry for the child who really seemed jittery and completely unable to focus on the lesson. Children whose adhd is so all encompassing have been described this medication for a reason. They should have it. It is frankly irresponsible to not provide what hs been prescribed. If the medication isn't needed the parents need to speak to the prescriber and stop it responsibly.

He's getting his pen license taken away, which is the natural consequence of not taking the meds. If that's an acceptable choice, then so be it. But the solution isn't to not take the meds and then also remove evidence of the impact of that choice.

You also have no idea what the full impact of his ADHD is. ADHD medication isn't freely given out - I have multiple family members who have been diagnosed but not given medication.

Nowhere do I see that he's being put in isolation, punished, or being sent home - things that point to the 'comfort or convenience of other people.' He is simply having his pen license taken away because of the effect of not taking medication on that day.

You know what's different. That is absolutely ridiculous and offensive to both people with ADHD and to people with cancer.

Yes, they are short acting and leave the body rather than build up - but the body learns how to respond to them with regular exposure. Taking them daily is advised so that the body is accustomed to them and responds to them consistently and also to avoid the ‘rebound effect’.

Every psychiatrist we have seen has stated the same - the effect of the tablets persist over the 4 or 8hr for which they are designed, but rebound effects and the bodies ability to respond efficiently to the medication relies on taking it regularly. It is fine to skip a dose occasionally or reduce it (my teen will if she has a party in the evening and wants to be able to drink alcohol), but only taking it sporadically means the person taking it is not getting the full benefit and risks a rebound.

@SomethingInnocuousForNow What do you mean? The boy has a condition-the mum has decided that he, at 9 years old, can decide if he wants to take the prescribed mediation.

I imagine-I hope-that if he cancer- she would make him take the medication whether he wanted to or not.

What's different? maybe the fact that she doesn't think ADHD is a condition at all.

Nonetheless, in my world, a 9 year old doesn't get to make decisions about what medication he will or won't take. So WTF right back at you!

If she wants to treat her 9 year old with someone with as much knowledge about his condition and the medication required to deal with that condition as her and medical professionals, then she is foolish woman.

He decides whether or not to take it! What the actual fuck!

Yes. Only quite often children with ADHD don’t care about consequences:

My argument is not that he shouldn’t take the meds. But that forcing or shaming him in to it won’t be the best approach.

The school continually taking away the (stupid) pen license is not the best approach to support him. It’s not something they should be focusing on.

It all needs to be handled differently. Then he may happily take his meds and also feel supported, happy and confident at school, which is also important and will have an impact on behaviour.

Yes the principle of pen licences generally sounds a bit mad. Having said that, I've heard teachers say that handwriting is deteriorating badly and increasing numbers of children produce illegible writing. I can't judge I can barely read my own writing!

That aside it's still an opportunity for OP to link choice to consequence in a really direct way. (OP I do agree find out what was different about those 2 days and don't assume it was just about no medication.)

What the fuck??

If he had cancer, would you allow him to decide that he won't take his medication?

Personally, I think it may be a bad idea to give your son the choice of taking the meds or not. Could you check whether sporadic medication has any impact on his ADHD? In my experience as a teacher, pupils take meds regularly and don’t miss doses.

I'd never heard of pen licences. Is it any wonder there are increasing numbers of behaviour problems and burnt out teachers with such ridiculous practices in place. Let's shame the children who's writing skills aren't up to scratch by them having different tools to their peers. Really big up moving on to a pen by calling it a 'pen licence', make it the exciting tool they all want to use. Then they have their licence revoked it if they have a bad day and are back to using the lowly pencil. I'm sure that leaves them full of enthusiasm for writing!
Is it not obvious to schools that this will impact a child's self-esteem and confidence, in turn impacting behaviour and attainment.

But the functioning we're talking about here is fidgeting in the seat and writing messily. That is still functioning!

I can now see why so many disability activists have such a problem with the medical model of disability.

I ask the question about sedatives because there's a really long history of sedating the shit out of autistic people, sometimes with medications that can fuck up your health a lot, for autistic behaviour. I mean it's acceptable if the behaviour is really extreme and nothing else has helped, but if that isn't the case it's just ... horrible.

I am all for meds in the best interests of that person or where they want them, but not for the comfort or convenience of other people.

Have you actually spoken to the teacher about it and asked for their reasoning for refusing to allow him to use a pen in those days? It seems like he hasn’t taken his medication in a number of occasion buts only ‘lost’ his pen license twice. By speaking to the teacher you can confirm what has happened on those two days compared to the other days when he hasn’t taken the meds and not had the same consequence.

You need to check that there hasn’t been other issues leading up to the removal - a build up of poor behaviour choices, distracting others, etc. it if it is just an inconsistent approach by the teacher.

It seems that he does have some accommodations made for his ADHD - fidget toys, chair bands - so it doesn’t feel like the teacher is completely ignoring his needs.

So what’s happened in those two days for things to be different?

I hate pen licences too but that’s a separate issue really.

You're actually confirming my post. For a 9 year old to have been diagnosed with ADHD and be medicated (especially given the diagnostic delays) there has been a serious and observable impact on his behaviour. Your son has a very different 'style' of ADHD from the OP's son. 'Just' being fidgety is really disruptive to other people around him which is why he's using fidgets etc.If only he had access to something to reduce his hyperactivity and improve his focus... Oh wait, he does! He's choosing not to take it. That's his choice (not everyone likes the feeling of stimulants or side effects).

So I don't agree with forcing medication either BUT I do agree with beginning to link choices and consequences as early as possible. Using a pencil is a simple, non-invasive way of doing this. As an adult with late diagnosed ADHD I am paying for the choices I made along the way and my inability to understand process. I wish someone had taught me this early on in a way that didn't involve beating me. Choices have consequences. FAFO as they say.

If the child had a medical condition that meant they needed sedative medication to function, then yes? What an odd question. OP’s DS’ functioning is clearly reduced when he doesn’t take the medication, and he is experiencing tje natural consequences when he doesn’t take it. Removing evidence of the consequences won’t help him, it will just allow him to deny his diagnosis, which OP says is the main issue.

Would you say the same if it was sedative medication for a child?

Edited to say:
It's just not really a free choice, is it? Either take these stimulants which might make you feel awful, or be shamed in front of your peers for something that just really doesn't matter.

The minute I stopped trying to get my son to take the meds he decided to take them for himself. Initially I’d be coming at him with a pill in my hand. That went well (it didn’t). It’s not easy.

Speaking as someone who is medicated for ADHD…he has a choice. He takes the medication and gets the benefit, or doesn’t take it and experiences the natural consequences. It‘s sending a confusing message if you want him to not take the meds, but also not experience the consequences. The school is doing nothing wrong.

For those criticising the parents.. Usual punishments don’t work for the ADHD brain. The stick approach does not work (carrot does and lots of praise) they don’t really care about consequences.

And often if you push and push they will then do the opposite. It’s a lot of fun!

It doesn't sound like you will, but please don't let anyone convince you to "force" your son to take stimulant meds go stop him fidgeting and improve his handwriting. That would be barbaric. Different conversation if he is hitting people or climbing on the school roof.

In response to your actual OP, yes, the school should make reasonable adjustments. That depends on how your son sees it all, he could just be allowed to write in pencil without any discussion around pen licences. If he finds it shaming or embarrassing, he can just write in pen. I mean next year (or certainly by secondary school) they'll all be writing in pen anyway and no one will have a pen licence!

Mine said the same. I specifically asked if he could take them as and when and have breaks at the weekend and she said yes. It’s a huge appetite suppressant and this is tricky for growing boys who are active. My DS was losing weight so needed to have breaks to get his appetite back and put weight on.

I’ve never even heard of a pen licence.
Can remember when doing B.Ed one of the golden rules was what a child has earned shouldn’t be taken away.
Why on earth do schools make life so complicated, for themselves and the children? It’s like setting them up to fail.

So glad I retired when I did….I could not inflict this misery on children.

Have you asked the teacher for the reason she takes the pen away?

Could he be doodling in ink on his copies, books or desk and it's simpler to swap him to pencil those days than punish him for something he doesn't think through fully?

Perhaps he could take the decision to use pencil the days he doesn't want to take the meds, it would remove the disappointment and give him more control, obviously with the teacher's understanding and agreement.